The SF Bay Area is full with attitude. Millionaires fighting other millionaires over their view, over the location of their fence, where their neighbors pool should not be located, or how their neighbors removal of a shed has caused their pool to crack. Their deep unhappiness is covered by the shiny new luxury cars they drive.
Yes, I live here and despite all that I still love the place. Besides the crap described there are tons of great folks too, and obviously the sailing and generally speaking the natural beauty is hard to beat.
Actually, I do not think unwelcoming yacht clubs are a specific Bay Area problem: nation-wide welcoming yacht clubs seem to be the exception, not the rule. Try getting into any YC that charges a high initiation fee. It will not be different in Chicago, San Francisco, San Diego, Seattle, or Rhode Island. Over here my experience has been pretty good with YC's. I have been to a bunch of clubs as guest when I was either crewing or dinghy sailing (I can think of Richmond, Berkeley, GG, SF, St Francis and a few in Alameda). The experience might be different when you show up outside of an event you registered for. I remember one instance at St. Fancy when at registration most of us had made up the YC we were a member of. During the awards ceremony the commodore made fun of those made up yacht clubs, all in good spirits. When entering they do ask you to take off your cap and not crash a wedding in your wetsuit, but I can live by those rules especially when rewarded with a ridiculously spectacular view while having tacos and beers.
I am not familiar with the club in Sausalito.