Para Handy

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12 Whiner

About Para Handy

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    Sailing and, er, sailing

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  1. Para Handy

    Sailing around the world in a San Juan 24

    #FindRimas He’s not been seen or heard from in months. WTFRU Rimas?
  2. Para Handy


    And then it will wipe out the camera.
  3. Para Handy


    And solar panels. It's certainly going to be interesting watching that webcam.
  4. Para Handy


    If those that were stupid enough to ignore mandatory evacuation warnings find themselves up to there necks in floodwater will the emergency services still respond to cries for help, assuming, of course, the idiots can be heard. I seem to remember the governor of one state telling these people "You will be on your own, rescue services will not respond" or something similar. Frankly, I believe those that are putting their faith in God should see it through, to the pearly gates if necessary. Why should others put their lives at risk for fools?
  5. Para Handy


    Stay safe guys, look after each other, and remember, everything you own will one day be junk; sometimes sooner than you would like. Nothing you own is worth risking your life for.
  6. Para Handy

    How do you define bad crew?

    Ideally carrying a mug of rum laced cocoa.
  7. Para Handy

    How do you define bad crew?

    Having seen what happens when a ring is caught in a turnbuckle split-pin when someone jumps into the dinghy, I no longer allow rings to be worn on board my yacht. (belly; nose; nipple or finger; clit on the other hand is allowed)
  8. Para Handy

    How do you define bad crew?

    Nah. They're fine. It's Hurricane Jack you have to look out for.
  9. Para Handy

    How do you define bad crew?

    I'll start. I once had the misfortune to sail with a guy who would come on deck at night wearing a head torch. Did wonders for everyone else's night vision. He couldn't understand why yachts weren't fitted with headlights. Another bloke who, because he was a bodybuilder, though he was God's gift to winches. Yes, he was strong, as his ability to rip the clew out of a jib when the lazy sheet got jambed testified. And because of his bodybuilder's diet he had the worst flatulence I have ever encountered. We eventually made him sleep in the cockpit as the stench was unbearable. Despite being told several times not to take a turn round her hand when hauling on the sheets, one female crewmember broke two fingers and dislocated another two during a gybe when the mainsheet pulled her hand into the blocks. Then you have the ones who complain about being left behind, saying, "I was only quarter of an hour late." when we had a tide to catch.
  10. Para Handy

    Sailing “bucket list” thread

    Hmm, bucket list? How about:- Out to St Kilda and, preferably, back. (About a week) Round Britain. (Several weeks) Complete the Jester Azores Challenge. (A month or more there and back) Complete the Jester Atlantic Challenge. (An entire summer) To still be sailing well into my 80’s (and you can read that two ways)
  11. Para Handy

    Sailing around the world in a San Juan 24

    Sadly, I reckon his next boat trip will be in the company of Charon.
  12. Para Handy

    How do you define Good Crew?

    I don’t race and sail solo most of the time. Lately I’ve been taking my grandkids (singly, there’s too many of the little buggers to all come at once) out for two or three days at a time to see if any of them show an interest. One, 13 years old, is as keen as mustard. Suddenly, having someone to pass my experience on to is a blessing. She can tack the boat tending helm or sheets, trim the sails, handle dock lines, hang fenders, brew coffee, set a course on chart or plotter (with a bit of help), never gets seasick, do a backsplice and eyesplice in 3-strand, not fazed by the intricacies of the sea toilet, and bring us into an anchorage while I’m on the foredeck prepping the anchor. She’s a good crew who I hope will take me out sailing in my dotage. Might leave my boat to her in my will. At any other time Good Crew is someone who buys the first round ashore and drinks rum on board.
  13. Para Handy

    Sailing around the world in a San Juan 24

    I have a cap like that. He looks better than when he arrived. Could his ss payments be going direct to his mastercard? Anyone able to translate that link, or date it? Could be 5th Feb or 2nd May.
  14. Para Handy

    Sailing around the world in a San Juan 24

    Don’t be stupid. That would require Rimas to be proactive and capable of tying knots.
  15. Para Handy

    “Knot” a cool pun: worst boat names ever

    I’ve seen a :- Smug Druggler. (A very fast sports boat) Banclay’s Barque. (Probably financed by Barclay’s Bank) Gay Abandon. (all male crew, strangely enough) Goodytwoshoes. (a catamaran) And cleverest of all, d∩ sɯoʇʇoq