cms

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314 F'n Saint

About cms

  • Rank
    Super Anarchist
  • Birthday 04/07/1955

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  • Location
    Le Minihic near St. Malo
  • Interests
    Life, the Universe and Everything.

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  1. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    What's the point of voting for a party so determined not to get elected? To win an election you need to win the centre.
  2. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Brexit. There is nothing else that matters. Whyne told us. Anything which could be construed as cooperating with the EU must be banned. France suggests opening borders with UK, despite UK being worse on infections and deaths and all the measures necessary to reduce these. Fuck that, no way will we allow ourselves to be seen to be talking to those nasty people on "the continent". Brexit is royally stuffed and they know it, so only by making the people believe that the EU is responsible for no deal, and that Covid-19 bollocksed the wizard plan they had, guaranteeing sunlit uplands ....
  3. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    "Too good to miss. It clears up everything. Enjoy. The week in Tory (Cummings special): 1. Dominic Cummings, one of the few men to have ever been found in contempt of Parliament, moved onto contempt for everything. 2. When the story broke, and he was accused of doing things that look bad, he said he didn't care how things looked. 3. Then ministers said press outrage meant nothing, only the opinion of the people mattered. 4. Then polls showed 52% of people wanted Cummings to resign. 5. So Cummings decided to show the public some respect, by turning up 30 minutes late to make his explanation. 6. He began by saying he wasn't speaking for the govt, which must be why he was in the Rose Garden of 10 Downing Street. 7. Then the self-styled "enemy of the Islington media elite" said his wife, who works in the media, had been ill in their house in Islington. 8. But she was only a bit ill, so he popped home, got himself nice and infected, then went back to Downing Street for meetings with lots of vitally important people in the middle of a national crisis. 9. But then he got ill too, so then it was suddenly important. 10. Sadly he couldn't get childcare in London, even though 3 immediate relatives live within 3 miles of his London home. 11. So because he was carrying a virus that can cross a 2 metre distance and kill, he immediately locked himself in a car with his wife and child for 5 hours. 12. He then drove 264 miles without stopping in a Land Rover that gets maybe 25 MPG. 13. Then the scourge of the metropolitan elites made himself extra-relatable by describing his family's sprawling country estate, multiple houses and idyllic woodlands. 14. He explained that he'd warned about a coronavirus years ago in his blog. 15. Then it was revealed he actually secretly amended old blogs after he'd returned from Durham. 16. And anyway, if he'd warned years ago, why was he so massively unprepared and slow to react? 17. Then he said he was too ill to move for a week. 18. But in the middle of that week, presumably with "wonky eyes", he drove his child to hospital. 19. Then he said that to test his "wonky eyes" he put his wife and child in a car and drove 30 miles on public roads. 20. Then it was revealed his wife drives, so there was no reason for the "eye test", cos she could have driven them back to London. 21. Then it was revealed the "eye test" trip to a local tourist spot took place on his wife's birthday. 22. Then cameras filmed as he threw a cup onto the table, smirked and left. 23. And then it emerged his wife had written an article during the time in Durham, describing their experience of being in lockdown in London, which you'd definitely do if you weren't hiding anything. 24. A govt scientific advisor said "more people will die" as a result of what Cummings had done. 25. Boris Johnson said he "wouldn't mark Cummings " down for what he'd done. 26. The Attorney General said it was ok to break the law if you were acting on instinct. 27. The Health Minister said it was OK to endanger public health if you meant well. 28. Johnson said Cummings' "story rings true" because his own eyesight was fine before coronavirus, but now he needs glasses. 29. But in an interview with The Telegraph 5 years ago, Johnson said he needed glasses cos he was "blind as a bat" 30. Michael Gove went on TV and said it was "wise" to drive 30 miles on public roads with your family in the car to test your eyesight. 31. The DVLA tweeted that you should never, ever do this. 32. Then ministers started claiming Cummings had to go to Durham because he feared crowds attacking his home. The streets were empty because we were observing the lockdown. 33. And then a minister finally resigned. 34. Steve Baker, Richard Littlejohn, Isabel Oakeshott, Tim Montgomerie, Jan Moir, Ian Dale, Julia Hartley Brewer, 30 Tory MPs, half a dozen bishops and the actual Daily Mail said Cummings should go. 35. The govt suggested we can ignore them, because they're all left-wingers. 36. Then a vicar asked Matt Hancock if other people who had been fined for doing exactly what Cummings did would get their fine dropped. Matt Hancock said he'd suggest it to the govt. 37. The govt said no within an hour. Cummings' statement had lasted longer than that. 38. And if the guidelines were so clear, why were people being stopped and fined for driving to find childcare in the first place? 39. Then a new poll found people who wanted Cummings sacked had risen from 52% to 57%. 40. Cummings is considered the smartest man in the govt 41. And in the middle of all this, in case we take our eye off it: we reached 60,000 deaths. One of the highest per capita death rates worldwide. 42. We still face Brexit under this lot. 43. It's 4 years until an election. 44. And it's still only Wednesday"
  4. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    I look forward to Whyne being deported over using red diesel. Last time I was involved was shopping a tosser from SA to the Met and HM Customs and Excise for invalid license and red diesel. To avoid a custodial sentence, he paid a thumping fine. He cheated a customer of mine not realising that I dealt with Customs on a regular basis and had several customer friends in the Met.
  5. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Whyne will love this one ... Alba gu bràth 34 mins · Boris Johnson has said "Dominic Cummings followed the instinct of every parent" by travelling and that his travel "was justified". Boris Johnson also said "You should not travel and visit family you do not currently live with - Unnecessary travel will be be the same as breaking the law during current lockdown restrictions and you will receive a fine". Families have not been able to attend funerals of loved ones and tens of thousands have died on hospital beds alone without their family beside them following the rules that Cummings himself helped create. Boris says Cummings was being a parent yet the guidelines clearly state that if anyone in your household has symptoms of COVID-19 all other residents should enter a state of self-isolation for 14 days, not be driven to their fucking grandparents house. Furthermore if you don't believe you have the eyesight to drive, you don't go a fucking drive to test it out because you're putting other families at risk on the road. Who the fuck is this clown?!!!!!
  6. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    From the Guardian online Cummings’ statement this afternoon did little or nothing to address the issues facing the government, according to Dr Michael Head, a global health expert at the University of Southampton:
  7. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Seeing what the former did to the crew of Dawn Patrol (Locura) at the 84 SORC made me stick to the latter, copiously....
  8. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Can she drive? DC said Boris was upstairs in bed. This was just after Boris's positive test. Weren't we told for quite a few days after that that he was self isolating at No 10, but in control and on top of everything? Stay at home. Part of this message was clearly fleshed out with don't put health services in other areas under pressure. Stay at home. Deal with whatever has to be dealt with right there. Is he really expecting us to believe that he could not find a solution for looking after his son in London? When they eloped it is unclear how ill she was, or was not, and he waffled on about SPADs not being in the list for being tested. If they had stayed put, they would have avoided any incidental risk - traffic accident, UFO landing on the motorway, 6 hours drive without a pee stop .... Barnard Castle.... Wonder when they concocted the story, rehearsed it and decided it was sound? Boris and co have known for 6 weeks. Why did the story break now? Jack's "framing" to push everything else off the front pages? I can't see the public accepting that the stay at home message was not royally flushed by someone who was involved in the policy. He came across as arrogantly suggesting that the government could not function without him. He was needed for everything from funding vaccines to providing finance for the NHS. He has a pretty global take on his remit and responsiblities.
  9. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    I have staff to bring me another Ricard.... so long as I am nice to her and do all the cooking.
  10. cms

    IOR Legend Sighting

    She started out like this ....
  11. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Boris is now to lead the presser at 17:00 local time, replacing the scheduled Housing Minister. Will he just say a cabinet office enquiry has been set up and hope the smoke clears, or will he try to look like he is in control. Some have been suggesting Labour favour the enquiry? A plan to discredit these enquiries? We are still waiting on the Priti Pathetic one, and of course Russian interference.
  12. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Laura K is just so hooked on her "privileged access" that she has completely swallowed the hook and promptly trots out what her "source" tells her to. Unless she applies for a job with Boris soon, she will be one more on the dole...
  13. cms

    Brexit WTF, WTF

    Oh, and France have indeed said that if the UK do apply quarantine to arrivals from France, reciprocal action will follow. Boris will be on the phone to Macron, just don't tell Gove and the Brexit public. Maybe he should ask Dom? Oh shit, he's in the shit himself ....