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    • UnderDawg

      A Few Simple Rules   05/22/2017

      Sailing Anarchy is a very lightly moderated site. This is by design, to afford a more free atmosphere for discussion. There are plenty of sailing forums you can go to where swearing isn't allowed, confrontation is squelched and, and you can have a moderator finger-wag at you for your attitude. SA tries to avoid that and allow for more adult behavior without moderators editing your posts and whacking knuckles with rulers. We don't have a long list of published "thou shalt nots" either, and this is by design. Too many absolute rules paints us into too many corners. So check the Terms of Service - there IS language there about certain types of behavior that is not permitted. We interpret that lightly and permit a lot of latitude, but we DO reserve the right to take action when something is too extreme to tolerate (too racist, graphic, violent, misogynistic, etc.). Yes, that is subjective, but it allows us discretion. Avoiding a laundry list of rules allows for freedom; don't abuse it. However there ARE a few basic rules that will earn you a suspension, and apparently a brief refresher is in order. 1) Allegations of pedophilia - there is no tolerance for this. So if you make allegations, jokes, innuendo or suggestions about child molestation, child pornography, abuse or inappropriate behavior with minors etc. about someone on this board you will get a time out. This is pretty much automatic; this behavior can have real world effect and is not acceptable. Obviously the subject is not banned when discussion of it is apropos, e.g. talking about an item in the news for instance. But allegations or references directed at or about another poster is verboten. 2) Outing people - providing real world identifiable information about users on the forums who prefer to remain anonymous. Yes, some of us post with our real names - not a problem to use them. However many do NOT, and if you find out someone's name keep it to yourself, first or last. This also goes for other identifying information too - employer information etc. You don't need too many pieces of data to figure out who someone really is these days. Depending on severity you might get anything from a scolding to a suspension - so don't do it. I know it can be confusing sometimes for newcomers, as SA has been around almost twenty years and there are some people that throw their real names around and their current Display Name may not match the name they have out in the public. But if in doubt, you don't want to accidentally out some one so use caution, even if it's a personal friend of yours in real life. 3) Posting While Suspended - If you've earned a timeout (these are fairly rare and hard to get), please observe the suspension. If you create a new account (a "Sock Puppet") and return to the forums to post with it before your suspension is up you WILL get more time added to your original suspension and lose your Socks. This behavior may result a permanent ban, since it shows you have zero respect for the few rules we have and the moderating team that is tasked with supporting them. Check the Terms of Service you agreed to; they apply to the individual agreeing, not the account you created, so don't try to Sea Lawyer us if you get caught. Just don't do it. Those are the three that will almost certainly get you into some trouble. IF YOU SEE SOMEONE DO ONE OF THESE THINGS, please do the following: Refrain from quoting the offending text, it makes the thread cleanup a pain in the rear Press the Report button; it is by far the best way to notify Admins as we will get e-mails. Calling out for Admins in the middle of threads, sending us PM's, etc. - there is no guarantee we will get those in a timely fashion. There are multiple Moderators in multiple time zones around the world, and anyone one of us can handle the Report and all of us will be notified about it. But if you PM one Mod directly and he's off line, the problem will get dealt with much more slowly. Other behaviors that you might want to think twice before doing include: Intentionally disrupting threads and discussions repeatedly. Off topic/content free trolling in threads to disrupt dialog Stalking users around the forums with the intent to disrupt content and discussion Repeated posting of overly graphic or scatological porn content. There are plenty web sites for you to get your freak on, don't do it here. And a brief note to Newbies... No, we will not ban people or censor them for dropping F-bombs on you, using foul language, etc. so please don't report it when one of our members gives you a greeting you may find shocking. We do our best not to censor content here and playing swearword police is not in our job descriptions. Sailing Anarchy is more like a bar than a classroom, so handle it like you would meeting someone a little coarse - don't look for the teacher. Thanks.

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Bob Perry

The world loses a great young sailor

556 posts in this topic

I don't want to burden you with this but you are my sailing family.

My 30 year old son, Spike, died last night from a viral infection.

 

We will have a real Irsh wake for him

 

For now I am in this sureal world.

 

But I know we all loved sailors and Spike was one of those you didn't need to tell what to do. He had grown up sailing from day one and he always knew what to do.

 

I'm going to miss my son.

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Dear Bob,

 

Horrible, what a loss ... my thoughts are with you !

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Wow I don't now what to say. I'm so sorry for your loss.

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My deepest condolences. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Spike.

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Bob,

W0W, so sorry, hard to say anything. Huge loss

Bob Pistay

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Bob... wow... I'm gutted for you. Lots of positive thoughts from the East Coast....

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Bob,

What terrible news. I am so sorry for your loss. Tip one back for me at the wake and know our prayers are with you all.

 

JM

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Thanks you guys.

I'm a bit of a weird world right now. My son Max is by my side and we are holding onto each other.

Spike was the kid you would want on your crew.

 

I'm hurting big time.

post-2980-057967600 1301758141_thumb.jpg

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Oh no. Bob, I am so very sorry. Your family is in our prayers.

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My deepest sorrow and sympathies for you and yours, Mr. Perry. May time and love ease your pain.

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Thanks you guys.

I'm a bit of a weird world right now. My son Max is by my side and we are holding onto each other.

Spike was the kid you would want on your crew.

 

I'm hurting big time.

 

 

So sorry for you Bob, thoughts are with you.

Every parent's worst fear.

 

Too young .... way too young.

 

Craig

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Bob, I'm very sorry for your loss. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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Deepest condolences, Bob, thoughts are with you and yours...

 

 

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Thanks you guys.

I'm a bit of a weird world right now. My son Max is by my side and we are holding onto each other.

Spike was the kid you would want on your crew.

 

I'm hurting big time.

 

Bob ,

I'm so very sorry for you and your family...

I remember seeing Spike at BBS on your design, I could tell he had a stake in the program, he was like your wingman.

 

God speed Spike and keep watching out for Dad from above.

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I'm hurting big time.

 

damn bob, life is truly not fair. words are not adequate but you have my deepest condolences.

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My son is a sailor too, we sail together a lot now, I just can't imagine the pain if I lost him. I am so sorry to hear this has happened. Words fail....

 

dash

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Mr. Perry. I cannot imagine. You have my profound and heartfelt sympathy. Fair winds to the young man. We'll have a thought for him and you while out on the water today.

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Thanks you guys.

I'm a bit of a weird world right now. My son Max is by my side and we are holding onto each other.

Spike was the kid you would want on your crew.

 

I'm hurting big time.

 

Bob,

 

There are some things in life that no one should ever experience and a parent burying his child is one of them! Please know that there is a whole big community out there that is sending love and good thoughts to you and your family right now.

 

Spike is now a member of the greatest sailing team ever and will always be 1st to the weather mark

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Bob,

 

I'm terribly sorry, that's just awful news. My prayers are with you and your family.

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I just don't what to say.

I would really hope that none of you would fel like I feel right now.

 

I'm sorry to lay this burden on you but the sailing comminity as clsoe to me.

I hurt.

post-2980-076343400 1301759155_thumb.jpg

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I'm very sorry, Bob. Our sailing community is with you.

Thoughts & prayers from Chicago.

 

Jim Calto

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Bob,

 

I am simply stunned. I feel that there is nothing I could say that could possibly mitigate the pain of such a loss. All I can say is that we ARE all here to listen to you, and to help you however we can.

 

Condolences,

 

Rich (Ajax)

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Oh, Bob, so sorry to hear. Good energies coming your way. Hang in there, and if possible, go sailing. Best, JW

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Bob, I cant imagine the pain you are in right now, and am so very sorry for your loss.

I hope one day the pain will subside and you will be warmed by all the wonderful memories of the 30 great years you were able to have with Spike. You sailed with your son, that is a very great gift that 99% of the people that walk this planet aren't given.

As I now look out over the vast ocean, I say a prayer for Spike and the whole Perry family. Rest in peace, Spike

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My heartfelt condolences to you and your wife for this tragic loss. No one should have to lose a child. It is just not meant to be.

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I'm not sure what to say. It's been 7 hours.

I thank you all.

 

I hope you never, ever have to go throgh this.

 

For me, I feeel I am part of the greater sailing community. I have ttied hard to be that.

It means a lot to me that you care.

I hurt so bad.

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oh my god, Bob, I am so sorry. Truly a parent's worst nightmare. My sincerest condolences.

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Bob,

 

I'm beyond words. You are part of our family and we are so terribly sorry for your loss. Our deepest sympathy for you and yours.

 

Larry

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I'm really sorry about your loss, Bob. Its especially chilling for me because I'm exactly the same age as your son. I don't know what else to say...

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so very sorry.

words are inadequate.

you are among friends.

my heart breaks for you and your family.

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God Bob- Horrible. Don't know how you can deal with it. We're supposed to go first. My thoughts and prayers.

 

MikeR

 

 

I don't want to burden you with this but you are may sailing family.

My 30 year old son, Spike, died last night from a vira; infection.

 

We will have a real Irsh wake for him

 

For now I am in this sureal world.

 

But I know we all loved sailors and Spike was one of those you didn't need to tell what to do. He had grown up sailing from day one and he always knew what to do.

 

I'm going to miss my son.

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Heartfelt condolences from the AC Forum posters............words fail, but perhaps some solace will flow from these pages and the concern and respect felt for you by the SA's........dp

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Thanks you guys. It means much to me that you care.

Right now I am hurting so much that I hpe you cannot ever imagine.

I'm just thinking about my kid

 

I really hoe that you never feeel; this pain.

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I'm not sure what to say. It's been 7 hours.

I thank you all.

 

I hope you never, ever have to go throgh this.

 

For me, I feeel I am part of the greater sailing community. I have ttied hard to be that.

It means a lot to me that you care.

I hurt so bad.

 

Speaking for the Night Runner family, we all are so sorry to hear about your loss. You have been a big part of our sailing family which makes this loss even more painful. Sail on Spike with fair winds!

post-6128-096689900 1301762606_thumb.jpg

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Bob

 

So sorry to hear the news. My condolences to you and your family.

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so sorry to hear.

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Bob, So very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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I'm very sorry Bob. My deep sympathies & condolences to you and your family.

 

I really don't know to say in situation like this. :(

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Bob,

 

My deepest condolences to you and your family. My thoughts will be with you.

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I don't want to burden you with this but you are may sailing family.

My 30 year old son, Spike, died last night from a vira; infection.

 

We will have a real Irsh wake for him

 

For now I am in this sureal world.

 

But I know we all loved sailors and Spike was one of those you didn't need to tell what to do. He had grown up sailing from day one and he always knew what to do.

 

I'm going to miss my son.

 

 

You and your family are in my prayers.

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Bob,

 

As a father I can't imagine how painful this is for you.

 

As is true, I'm sure, with most parents who care, I break a little inside each time I hear of the loss of a son or daughter - especially when someone I feel a connection to is involved (I've followed your work for decades).

 

Your journey forward is going to be difficult but I'm sure you know that at some point, along with serious and sad reflection, there will come great joy in your memories, shared experiences with loved ones and the photographs you're already beginning to find new meaning in.

 

Stay strong and bring your pain to places like this as you feel the need. We may not help much but we'll read with care, stay close through the words and offer up what we can for a crew member who's hurting.

 

“Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air…” Ralph Waldo Emerson

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My condolences. As a parent it's our worse fear.

Will pray that the time it takes for this to become bearable,

and believe it or not it will, comes soon for you.

You life wont ever be the same but always hold with you

the thought of how Spike would want you to carry on for yourself

and your family.

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Words aren't adequate, know that I am thinking of you and your family in this tough time.

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Bob,

 

Parents are not meant to bury their children. I'm so sorry.

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Oh man ! Bob, you have been friend and advisor to so many of us. I doubt there is a more loved and admired figure in this crazy cyber world we all share. Wombat Manor mourns your loss mate. Sad times, sad times indeed.

Condolences and a great big hug from us both.

Andrew and Wendy

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Bob,

While there are no words that can adequately comfort you in this time of grief, know that your friends are there for you to lean upon in the days and weeks ahead. Please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your beloved son Spike, and my prayers that you eventually find comfort in the memories of the thirty years that you enjoyed together.

 

Nick

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You and your family are in our thoughts, Bob.

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he'll be sailing, through dreams, through memories, go and walk the beach senor Perry, go sail the sea, he'll be there, with you. tough bullet to bite, let the sailor rest in peace.

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My heart goes out to you.

 

Sail on, spike.

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Bob,

 

Sincerest condolences.

 

Have a son and daughter, 34 and 30, and can't begin to imagine what you are feeling.

 

A time for many of us to reflect and be incredibly grateful for all we have and those we hold dear.

 

Sun finally appeared here an hour ago but after hearing this news, I don't find it very warming.

 

Be strong and resolve to deal with this as Spike would want you to.

 

 

Fair tides and a following breeze,

Red

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Bob, there is nothing, nothing I can say to lessen the grief but I am so so sorry for your loss.....

Kevin

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I don't want to burden you with this but you are may sailing family.

My 30 year old son, Spike, died last night from a vira; infection.

 

We will have a real Irsh wake for him

 

For now I am in this sureal world.

 

But I know we all loved sailors and Spike was one of those you didn't need to tell what to do. He had grown up sailing from day one and he always knew what to do.

 

I'm going to miss my son.

 

Bob so sad to hear, parents are never supposed to watch their children pass

 

Thoughts with you my Friend !

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Dear Bob,

 

I can barely imagine how much you must be hurting. Please know that we are all grieving with you. There will always be a place in our hearts for Spike and the Perry family.

 

Sincerely,

Paul

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Bob,

 

My deepest condolences for you and your family in this very trying point in your lives. I can't begin to express the sadness that I feel for you at this moment. May you in time feel peace. Fair winds and following seas spike.

 

Martin.

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Bob,

You and Spike, and the rest of your family will be in our prayers. We too are very sorry to hear about Spike.

 

I too have lost a child. I can tell you that it will get "better." It will never go away, and you don't want it to, but it will get better, and some of the hurt will go away.

 

Here's to Spike, may we remember him forever..

 

Take care of yourself and your family, and let us know how we can help...all of us would love to be able to anything, something, should you ask.

 

Sincerely,

Pete

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Bob

 

I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through.

Deepest sympathies from Patti and I.

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Very sorry for your loss Bob.

Know that a thousand sailors' prayers are sending fair winds to Spike as he sails along the rhumb line to heaven.

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As a parent, I cannot imagine the pain you must feel. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this time.

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Bob,

 

What absolutely devastating news. Our thoughts are with you and your family.

 

Doug.

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Not a living soul can take your pain from you, but your family can remind you what a gift it was to have had his love for 30 years. I hope you can find some solace with their company and eventually, through their help, your pain will ease.

 

We would take on any part of your pain if we could, but alas we can only hope to see it eventually fade to a loving memory of having been gifted with a great kid.

 

So I say, look to the heavens and curse the Gods with all your might; no loving God would hold it against you. Cry for your pain, cry for your families pain, cry for having been robbed of his company and when you can cry no more you will begin to rebuild his presence through memories and love.

 

Until that day, we can only look on and hope that we can help in some small way.

 

 

Condolences.

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I cannot imagine what you must be going through, probably many times worse than I can imagine.

 

My condolences and prayers go out to you and your family, and I wish you all the best in coping with what has happened.

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Bob -

 

I am so sorry to hear this terrible news. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Condolences, and fair winds to Spike.

 

Michael Hennessy

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when it comes,

it's like a flower unfolding. . .

when it goes,

it's like thunder rolling. . .

 

My heartfelt condolences to you and your family, Mr. Perry.

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While nothing can remedy the pain I can only imagine you are feeling today, celebrating a great life with an Irish wake sounds like a great tribute.

 

May the road rise up to meet you,

May the wind be ever at your back

May the sun shine warm upon your face

And the rain fall softly on your fields

And until we meet again, May God hold

you in the hollow of his hand

 

Fair winds, Spike.

 

Patrick Ryan Wilson

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The vodak has worn off and my oldest son Max has hidden the bottle.

I'm alert not but I wish I were not.

 

Your feelings mean a lot to me.

Thanks

 

Spike would always have been there to grab your line.

And he knew what to do with it.

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We're crying here with you. You can try switching over to beer if the vodka's been taken away.

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It is so easy for me to talk about getting back up and getting on with life.

 

An injury is one thing but death is final (in the physical sense).

 

I don't even know what I would do or say if my son passed.

 

Bob, There is tomorrow, you know your son want's you to live on. Grieve and look for brighter days ahead. :wub:

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Bob, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you.

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absolutely gutted for you Bob. Can't even begin to imagine.

 

deepest condolences,

Jeff

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When I read your first post this morning, it brought tears to my eyes. Such a difficult loss, it left me thinking about where he is.

 

So this:

 

 

THE VOYAGE

Whichever way the wind doth blow,

Some heart is glad to have it so;

Then blow it east or blow it west,

The wind that blows, that wind is best.

 

My little craft sails not alone:

A thousand fleets from every zone

Are out upon a thousand seas;

And what for me were favoring breeze

Might dash another, with the shock

Of doom, upon some hidden rock.

 

And so I do not dare to pray

For winds to waft me on my way,

But leave it to a Higher Will

To stay or speed me; trusting still

That all is well, and sure that He

Who launched my bark will sail with me

Through storm and calm, and will not fail,

Whatever breezes may prevail,

To land me, every peril past,

Within his sheltering haven at last.

 

Then, whatsoever wind doth blow,

My heart is glad to have it so;

And blow it east or blow it west,

The wind that blows, that wind is best.

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Oh no! Bob! I am so, so, sorry! Such a tragic loss.

 

What can I do? How can I help? If you need anything please let me know.

 

Joe

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I can't think of anything to say that doesn't risk sounding trite or contrived, and even as an "adopted" father I can't begin to imagine the pain you and your family are going through..

 

You have mine and Ms. Poda's deepest condolences to you and your family, and to anyone else who's lives were undoubtedly blessed by your son.

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My deepest condolences Bob. Having experienced a sudden, unexpected loss myself when my wife died 5 years ago (at 37)I know some of the pain/anger/confusion you're dealing with.

 

Let time do it's job taking the edge off things, meanwhile stay healthy and know that your son wouldn't want to be the cause of pain. Remember him well by living well and resist the urge to smack the well-meaning that tell you "life is for the living" no matter how much a pithy phrase can grind at times such as these. Especially when somebody trots out the "God doesn't give you burdens you cannot bear..." bit - they are TRYING to be comforting, no matter how insensibly maddening it sounds now.

 

We love you, man. Stay strong for the rest of the family.

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Bob, so sorry to hear of your loss. My deepest sympathy are with you and your family at this time.

 

I doubt anything I can say or do will help at this time, but I will mention that The Compassionate Friends were a Godsend to my parents when we lost my younger brother. I wish you peace and strength.

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Bob

I'm gutted to hear this. I can not imagine your pain right now. A glass will be raised, or several.

 

Our thoughts are with you.

 

- Graham

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Oh, no, no, no.

 

We are all deeply hurt by this sorrowful news.

 

The SA community is sharing your sorrow, Bob. SA loves you and we love Spike, too.

 

I believe somehow Spike's spirit has entered each of us today, and we now traverse this difficult course together.

 

Your photos are beautifully chosen. They show in summary a beautiful human being, so keen on sailing and the sea.

 

 

While sitting here crying for the past few hours, I found a couple of quotations to further reflect my sympathy...

 

 

If tears could build a stairway,

And memories a lane,

I'd walk right up to Heaven

And bring you home again.

 

~Author Unknown

 

 

 

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, but love leaves memories no one can steal.

 

~From a headstone in Ireland

 

 

Fair winds, Spike.

 

- Larry and Holly Moran

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Bob,

 

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

 

Mark S

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Bob,

 

I'm truly saddened to hear about your loss. As a parent it's you're worst nightmare and I can't even bear to think about what you must be feeling right now. My condolences to you and your family in this difficult times.

 

B.J.

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Bob,

 

My heartfelt condeolences go out to you and your family. As a relatively new father I can only imagine your feelings.

 

God Bless you and your family.

 

Will Museler

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Bob, terrible, terrible sad news.

 

Both you and Jill have my deepest condolences.

 

Mark

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Thanks:

Those are ver nice things you have posted.

I truly appreciate it.

I will rememeber those posts.

We will have a huge Irish wake in a few weeks. I'll let you know.

Mom is having a hard time with it now.

 

Right now the house is quiet. My oldest son and his wife are here. He's another great sailor.

I can't imgaine what tommorrow will be like.

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