Max Rockatansky

never fuckin' mind

Recommended Posts

I thought we were going to see the Arno.

 

 

============================================

Shhh, they're strapping down Liza Minelli.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bart: If the Lord is all-powerful why does he care whether we worship him or not?

 

Homer: It's because God is powerful, but also insecure -- like Barbra Streisand before James Brolin. Oh, he's been a rock.



============================

 

 

How many gazebos do you shemales need?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

from now on you shall be called brian that is called brian.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

take it to GA you GA landlubbers

 

You're not from around here are you?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gentlemen, you are all in a line of elite men, great men, who have defended the world's most enduring sporting record. It's an honor to know you, it's an honor to sail with you. Tradition has it that the first American skipper to ever loose the Cup will replace it with his own head in the trophy case. Gentlemen, my head is in your hands. Please be careful, I've become attached to it. I would propose a toast. The Cup.

 

Hear! Hear! The Cup!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sorry, Wilson! Wilson, I'm sorry!



I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go.



It's a pressure valve. It won't open unless there's tremendous pressure.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My love for you is like a truck, Berserker!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I broke his fuckin' neck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My mom came home the other night and she poured hot grease over my ass , my back and my genitals, and then my shoes fell off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm no longer impressed by my own resume.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit...It's the only way to be sure.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That scag and his floozie, they're gonna die.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Shawn, I knew your people, your grandfather, died in Australia... in a penal colony, your father... he was a good man too...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

He must be ambidextrous Bob

 

I don't know about that but he can use both feet

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

.... listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Okay, here's the story. I come from the gutter. I know that. I got no education... but that's okay. I know the street, and I'm making all the right connections. With the right woman, there's no stopping me. I could go right to the top.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Jane, you ignorant slut!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm only 4 inches away from happiness!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

One more push, I'm gonna to smack his face so hard he'll have to stick his toothbrush up his arse to clean his teeth!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Would you tell this muthafucka he can sew this shit back on? It's like that dude whose wife cut his dick off, threw it on the freeway? She just called Triple A, they towed the dick and sewed the muthafucka back on. Listen up, jackass, I saw the muthafucka in a porno, the thang still worked, it looked like a chewed-up frank, but that little muthafucka be workin' that muthafucka. It's mangly, but he be fuckin' the bitch all kind of ways with a twisted dick.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

[in Japanese] Hello. Your tits are as beautiful as Mt. Fuji. Would you mind if I rubbed my face in them?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Artists use lies to tell the truth, while politicians use them to cover the truth up.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

National Beer

National Beer

You'll like the taste of National Beer

And while we're about it, we're proud to say,

It's brewed on the shores...

Of the Chesapeake Bay

 

Natty Boh hon

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm boiling a roast. How hot and wet do you like it?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Call me if his condition changes.

 

 

He's dead.

From the legendary and oh so profane Moms Mabley:

 

They say only to speak good of the dead. He's dead. That's good.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

From the Land of Sky Blue Waters,

From the land of pines' lofty balsams,

Comes the beer refreshing,

Hamm's the beer refreshing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Have you ever seen a body like this in your life!?!

 

- She happens to be my daughter...

 

Oh, well than I guess you have.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Excellent round son soldier, excellent round, top notch, top notch!

 

 

 

be the ball Danny, be the ball, you're not being the ball Danny

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

Excellent round son soldier, excellent round, top notch, top notch!

 

 

 

be the ball Danny, be the ball, you're not being the ball Danny

 

Well it’s kinda difficult with you talking like that........

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My friends,

either you are closing your eyes to a situation you do not wish to acknowledge,

or you are unaware of the caliber of disaster indicated by a pool table in your community.

 

My friends you got trouble,

right here in River City.

That begins with "T" and that rhymes with "P"

and that stands for pool.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Swear to God Snake, I thought you were dead...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And what are these really big things that are right in the middle of your view of the Sac-o-Suds and your kitchen window, what do we call these big things?


...


Trees?


...


Trees! That's right! Don't be afraid just shout 'em right out when you know 'em.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What was that word? Did you say, "yoots?"

 

 

Oh, I'm sorry Judge.... 'Yyyyyoooouuuuuuuuuuttttthhhsssssssss.'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit...It's the only way to be sure.

Okay, it's been fun, but there are so many refs I don't get or maybe just missed, can we begin a "Aha, I know that one, I'm almost as cool as you"?

 

Toward that, aha! I think this is from the second Alien movie, best SF franchise of all time. Please, please tell me I'm at least close to right.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Abby Normal

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for. Do you understand? Do not open this door.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. What's the matter with you people? I was joking! Don't you know a joke when you hear one? HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here! Open this goddamn door or I'll kick your rotten heads in! Mommy!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

you are in more dire need of a blowjob than any white man in history.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Then I tore out his liver, fried it up with some fava beans and served it with a nice chianti....PHFFFFFFFF!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What knockers!

 

Thank you Doctor.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole... wheel of cheese? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing. How 'bout we get you in your p.j.'s and we hit the hay.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

PC Load Letter? What the fuck does that mean?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I, uh, betrayed my wife. I betrayed myself. I've killed men, and I ordered men to be killed. No, it's useless. I killed... I ordered the death of my brother; he injured me. I killed my mother's son. I killed my father's son.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow. Never ceases to amaze me. What cologne you gonna go with? London Gentleman, or wait. No, no, no. Hold on. Blackbeard's Delight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Always look on the bright side of life.

Life's a piece of shit,

When you look at it.

Life's a laugh an death's a joke, It's true.

When you're feeling in the dumps,

Don't be silly chumps,

Just purse your lips and whistle,

That's the thing!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

John Lennon once said,"I don't believe in beatles i just believe in me." Smart man, after all he was the walrus. I could be the walrus, but I'd still have to bum rides off of people.