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Are We Over?

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Give us your version of the theoretical conversation between the skippy and the crew on the I-14's in the picture. Top three get cool swag from our friends at The Sailing Pro Shop. Good Times!

 

We finally got around to announcing the winners of the Caption Contest, brought to you by The Sailing Pro Shop, who provided some great prizes.

 

1st Place: Mr. Happy

"Fuck, this isn't our start!" Wins an $80 Mylar pro race bag.

 

2nd place: ACK758

"Think we're over???"

"Well, the starting line is about a quarter-mile long... factor in our speed, heading, and the current... divide all that by the momentum we lose because of the rotation of the earth and the configuration of the boats around us... In my professional opinion, I'd say we're good to go."

"You have no idea, do you?" Wins a $45 DRYSHIRT:

 

3rd place: Warped Sol

RACE Committee PRO: Damnit, this after 3 general recalls. Screw the black flag. Signal "individual recall" and mark down that poor SOB with the third row start as the only one starting properly. Wins a $60 Mylar day bag.

 

Winners send me an e-mail to get your swag.

17th_Feb_renee_start_line.jpg

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"i say were over"'

"yeah, well your over"

"why'd you paint this thing orange"

"it came that way"

"they wouldn't see us if it was white"

"I'll get you a brush"

"are we over?"

"oh, were over"

"can I date your sister now"

"tacking"

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"1 boat lenth... ahead of the line"

"2 boat lengths ahead of the line"

BOOM

"3 boat..."

"shut up and hike harder"

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Are we over?

 

No, we're perfect, go!

 

I think we were over.

 

No way, we were right on, GO!

 

I don't think so, I think we should go back.

 

We're fine! TRUST ME!

 

 

 

 

(true story, we were over)

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-Up, Up, Up!

+I am, chill!

-Ok, boatspeed... boatspeed!

+Call waves!

-Why do you think I said boatspeed?

+Because I was going "Up, up, up!" We were stalling.

-Stay in the game...keep drivin' the boat...

+You're doing a pretty good job of it right now...wanna trade?

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SKIPPER: How're we doing?

 

CREW: They're faster, and WAY higher...how're they pointing so high...

SKIPPER: No wonder they're point so high, look how they hiking! Why don't YOU hike like that??!!

 

CREW: Well, if you paid me like he pays HIS crew, I would!

SKIPPER: If I could afford to pay, I'd hire HIS crew!

 

CREW: Well, there ya go then.

SKIPPER: Grumble.....

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(Gun!)

 

Skipper: Are we clean?

 

Crew: Dunno…

 

Skipper: WTF?

 

Crew: Sorry mate, wasn't paying attention 'cause it looks like Ben’s kicking Dean’s ass out on course right.

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Crew - 1 boat length, just hold here

 

Skipper - I think we are over, we need to come down

 

Other boat - leeward!, get the hell out of here!

 

Crew - just stay right here, they can't get to us, just keep pushing the guy above us up, we need room to foot

 

Other boat - Leeward!, Come on guys, you have to come up more!

 

Skipper (yelling now) - How the hell do I come up with 50 boats above me? Shut up!

 

Crew - Ok, time to start moving, 10 seconds...

 

other boat - Don't come down, no rights!!!

 

Crew - They are too low, not an issue, just drive right over them

 

other boat desperately luffs head to wind to try and push you over as you drive right over them

 

(Gun)

 

Skipper - where the hell is the line

 

crew - how the hell should I know, I was too busy trying to keep you from hitting that other guy

 

together - screw it, there were other people further over than us

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shot

skipper: do u think we had been over the line?

crew: don´t htink so, what does the start boat says?

skipper: can´t see it, do u see it?

crew: yes

skipper: and, do u see any signals?

crew: yeah, but drive on, just the guys from finland had bean to early...

skipper: really, how do u know?

crew: i just see the finland flagg...

skipper: :blink:

;)

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Team GBR - " I say, old boy, would you mind awfully just luffing up a smidgeon? There's a good fellow"

 

Team AUS - "Fack off you Pommie Facker"

 

Team GBR - "I say! Good Lord!"

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Skipper---"How do we look, feels like shit"

 

Crew-----"were alright, were alright, feels fine"

 

Skipper looks over shoulder

 

skipper---"you gotta F'UP version of ALRIGHT

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BANG! (It's the finish dumbies, not a start!)

 

Skipper - Good finish eh mate!

Crew - That was a hell of a last beat. Having all of the intergalactic PHRF fleet champions sail a OD regatta made it a tight fleet.

Skipper - Yeah, now who wins on corrected time?

Crew - Well.... 12 seconds per mile over an hour and 10 gives us .... divide by three....square root of ...... No idea.

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"TIME"

"15 seconds"

"THERE'S A FUCKING HOLE I'M GOING FOR IT"

"10 Seconds"

"UP UP!!!!!"

"5 Seconds your early"

"FUCKING SHIT"

"3,2"

"GET OUT OF THE WAY DOPEY"

"Good start, clean air"

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SKIP: "How much time?"

CREW:"5 seconds"

s: let's go.

c: 4, 3, Oh SHIT!!!

s: what, what we're over?

c: I forgot the sandwiches on the dock.

s: Nice job you fack...

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"I don't give a crap if you did stay at a Holiday Inn last night, we were over the dame line, now just shut up and find me someone to protest......."

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Crew: Great start

Skipper: Thanks, nice job everyone

Tactician: Yeak nice job, too bad we're on the wrong side of the course!

Crew: I have a lane to tack, we only have to take 40-50 sterns.

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Skipper: We are early! LUFF!

Bow: *holding 3 fingers*

Tactician: GO GO GO

*BANG*

...

*BANG*

Skipper: FUCK we're over

Bow: NO! NOT US

RC (on radio): Scrambled list of boats impossible to decipher..

Bow: We're good, I'M POSITIVE

Skipper: looked early from back here

Tact: Sail Sail Sail, shut up and sail the fucking boat

Tact: Good start, we are clear ahead, keep sailing

(30 seconds later)

RC: Calls our numbers "Still OCR"

Skipper (me): Fall off Fall off Fall off prepare to jibe...FUCK YOU GUYS I knew we were over

Bow: I "thought" we were good (note the lack of "I'M POSITIVE")

 

______________

 

Oh well, I think we still climbed our back to a decent top 5 finish

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Crew: We're good, nice start

Skipper: Good lane up ahead.

Tactician: Thanks guys, all in a day's work.

Crew: What the hell are you doing here?

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Bowman: Slow down, we are going to be early......

 

Driver: I need more power...

 

Main Trimmer: We're going to be 5 sec's too early....

 

Jib Trimmer: Speed mode....

 

Bowman: On the line.....

 

Runner: 5, 4, 3, 2 , 1....

 

BOOM

 

Driver: ARE WE OVER??????

 

Bowman: YES

 

Driver: How do you know?

 

Radio: Over early, boat 45 ( yes, we were No. 45)

 

Driver: Who else is over.....

 

Bowman: No one.....

 

Driver: How the heck we were the only ones...

 

Runner: Because you ran over the pin and we're dragging it with us, look....

 

Driver: #*&!

 

Owner: Hopefully this won't make it on to Sailing Anarchy......

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I N D

D'ya think they caught us over early

I V I

I'd bet money on it, we're the only yellow boat out here

D U A L S

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Skipper: Trim for speed!

Crew: I am trimmed.

Skipper: Hike!

Crew: I am hiking.

Skipper: why are so slow?!

Crew: you were the one who said roachy sails aren't fast

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S: Fuck, where's the start boat?

C: Unless its slipped into a parralel universe its somewhere behind those guys, UP UP!.

S: Fuck, what about the Pin?

C: Port tacking this fleet would not be recommended.

S: Thanks for the useful advice but can you see it?

C: Woah! Head up man there's like 40 boats luffing us, can't see a thing down there would you like me to create a new window?.

S: Shut up, Fuck it, everyone's going, we're off, get out, here's the main, think fat and flat.

C: We should buy a watch

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S How long

C 40 seconds

S Ahh they are all early he he he

 

10 seconds later

S How long

C 10 seconds

S What the fuck

C I forgot I was using the stopwatch not the countdown

S Fuck me

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- Think we're over???

 

- Well, the starting line is about a quarter-mile long... factor in our speed, heading, and the current... divide all that by the momentum we lose because of the rotation of the earth and the configuration of the boats around us... In my professional opinion, I'd say we're good to go.

 

- You have no idea, do you?

 

- Nope.

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Bang!

 

Skipper; All right!! Great start, let's go..... hike, hike, boat speed, boat speed....

 

Crew; Ugggh...Ughh

 

Skipper; good boat speed, clear air, we're fast, ..... I think we can cross the fleet!

 

Crew; Let's go now!

 

Skipper; OK, Tacking...

 

 

AARRUUUGGGGAAAA (big horn blast....)

 

Loud Hailer: "You are in an LPG tanker "moving security zone"....please vacate the area!"

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Are we over??

 

No I can still see the committee boats

 

Boats??

 

yeah there are 2 of em

 

You idiot! That is TNZ going to windward

 

Oh!!

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*booom*

 

c: think we had been to early over the line.

s: why?

c: the guys on the start boat are yelling at us, don´t u think they want to recall us?

s: no no, we had been right...

c: how can u be that sure, they are really yelling at us. and just at us!

s: it´s not because we had been over any line... it´s about something different...

c: so about what is it?

s: i think it´s just because I didn´t payed the entry fee yet...

c: :blink:

 

 

 

or another version.

 

*boom*

 

C: to early, my fault, sorry...

S: No mather, so i can tell u now, that i forgot paying the entry fee...

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J105 Start # 1

Tactician: We're in flood, there will be space at the boat end.

Skipper: That's what you said for the first start yesterday

Tact: Yeah, but the flood hadn't actually started then, the tide book is wrong.

 

J105 Start #2

30 secs. Bow: Shows 5 fingers

Tact: OK, let's get this pig moving, foot a little

15 secs. Bow: Shows 5 fingers

Tact: What the f**k, we have been moving, how can it still be 5 lengths?

10 secs: Bow: Shows 0 fingers

Tact, skip and everyone: "F**k!"

 

J105 Start #3

Tact: Port approach, we'll tack into a gap in the RC third

Tact : Tack behind this guy

Tact: OK, we're good keep a little speed

Tact: Great, we have some space above, point.

Tact: that idiot above us is going to be over

Tact: F**k, he's bearing away.

Tact: Dude, you can't reach down on us. Up Up!

Idiot: No overlap, I can do this.

Tact: What are you taking about, you are reaching,.

Tact: This moron's going to hit us, bear away

Skip: Bear away to where, I've got a fleet stacked below me?

Tact: OK, so hit the guy above us, at least he'll be the one to pay for the damage.

Crunch.

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"Guys, would you mind taking a step back, so we can have some air here?"

 

"Aw shucks, I dont like racing anyway.."

 

"Skipper, I think you forgot to plug the drainage hole.."

 

"Ugh, I can't breathe, there just NO air here!"

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C- I think we're over

S- what do you want me to do?

C- I don't know

S- can you see the committee boat

C-I can't see anything

C- shit,shit, watch out for that guy

C- you're going to hit him

S- no I'm not

C- yes you are

S-I think we should just keep going

C-I think you're right

S- how do the sails look

C- I don't know

S- maybe more outhaul

C- maybe

S- was that a General Recall horn

C- I don't know

C- I still can't see the Committee boat

C- what flag is that anyway

S- should we just keep going

C- yeah might as well keep going unless others turn back

S- Ok

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15 seconds to start

 

Standard backround noises: flapping sails, curse words etc.

 

10 seconds to start

 

beep beep

 

7 seconds to start

 

beep beep beep beep

 

5 seconds to start

 

beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep

 

1 second to start

 

beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep

 

0 seconds to start

 

BANG

 

1 second after start

 

Skipper: Thanks for the christmas gift.

Crew gives puzzled look

Skipper: I can still remember the card you gave me with it. "I hope this new Ronstan clear start watch will give us an edge on the compeition"

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crew-Over!

 

Over?

 

crew- over!

 

WTF? we've got 5 minutes!

 

Crew - NO! Go over there, there's girls on that boat!

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crew: 20 seconds, why yellow?

skipper: ease a touch were early, it was the right boat at the right price.

crew: 10 seconds, you know yellow's unlucky right?

skipper: trim up lets go, you're not superstitious are you?

crew: there's the gun, fuck we're early

skipper: whaddya mean, you talk too much.

crew: eat my fuck!

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-Fuckitfuckitfuckit!

~What?

-I knew we should have gotten the **insert pay TV operator name** package with E! TV in it

~ :huh:

-Apparently white is the new kevlar for jibs this season.

we're like so last week!

~(to self) I just knew taking the hot chick on as crew was a bad idea :rolleyes:

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Give us your version of the theoretical conversation between the skippy and the crew on the I-14's in the picture. Top three get cool swag from our friends at The Sailing Pro Shop. Good Times!

Great Start guys. Decent seperation from the fleet now, but we're about 200 yards from getting starboard tacked from hell!!!!!

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novice crew memeber - "Was that the ten minute or the five minute gun?"

 

(theres alway one on board isnt there!)

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Skipper - "We over or what!!!!!!!!!"

Crew - "I think I heard our number. I think we should go back!"

Skipper - "Are you crazy, I'm in the middle of 100 boats. I'm scared. Hold me!"

Crew - "That is it, I want a divorse"

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Crew. "Maybe we're over"

Capt. "Maybe we're not"

Crew. "Why is everybody going the wrong way"

Capt. "What time was the start?"

Crew. "No idea."

Capt. "Well maybe we have just missed it."

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English: Dude are we over?

French: Dude Sommes-nous terminés ?

German: Dude Sind wir rüber?

Italian: Dude Siamo sopra?

Greek :Dude Τελειώνουμε;

American: Fuck’em all, go go go!

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Skipper: DAMN! I think we're over!

 

Crew: Awesome.

 

Skipper: Awesome!?! Black flag on the last race on the last day of the regatta. Now tell me, how could that possibly be AWESOME?!?

 

Crew: Simple. We'll be the first ones back at the bar.

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S: I need speed !

 

C: Head down a bit

 

S: I cant I have a Dickweed coming up to leeward

 

S: Trim me in I have to point !!

 

C: Your there !!

 

S: Hike Hike Hike !

 

C: Your over!!

 

S: No were NOT !

 

RC: BOOOOOOOOOM !!!!!!

 

RC: 796 over!

 

S: FUCCKKKKKK!!

 

C: Told U

 

S: Ease the F n Jib

 

C: This blows !

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skip...where's the line?

bowman...we're good, trim for speed

10.9.8...

hiker....dam we are over

7,6,5....

skip...hike, hike, hike

4,3,2...

hiker...i gotta pee...

1,gun...

bowman...we're good

skipper...hike hard guys hike hard

hiker...i can't hike any harder i gotta pee...

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