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Mr. Ed

Google & Babel Yacht Brokers

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From a Dutch advert translated by our friends at google: I particularly like that it has been stolen every winter.

Temporarily lowered! If we do business before 1 November, you can take the ship for EUR 15,000. Save me the heated winterstallation and 2 days of work (on and off, off and in the water).

 
Your own beautiful Waarschip 1010, well-equipped and holiday-ready! Extended skirt (+40 cm) with scoop (= swimming platform). Great sail, genua and gennaker from 2005, breeding 2007. Other older sails: High-aspect breeding, stormfuck, spinnaker. Stolen every winter. Rump painted in 2016, underwater ship bald + rocked and painted with 2-component primer in 2014. New tanks (diesel and water) both 65 liters of polyethylene in 2007. Navigation battery separated from battery refrigerator / power steering. New engine instrument panel in 2007. Cooling box 50 liter custom made, Peltier element 12v, detachable. Sleeps: 5, manual pump toilet, 2-burner stove (gas), sink with foot pump, solid screw shaft, 2-blade flap screw, water lubricated, trip coupler, 1 aluminum mast, chain anchor chain and line, swimming platform, sun tide, self-emptying deck, deck renovated in 2015, shore supply, electric system 12v, 220v shore power supply, 3x 220v power outlets, 2x light battery, 1x starter battery, Sterling battery charger 40a, Garmin 128 GPS, Icom m59 marphone, Sumlog log, depth gauge
 
i

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Oh, and these Dutch guys did their own. Rapid turnover!

 

This fast and comfortable Dehler 44 has had only one owner since her lunch ...”

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Ok, I know what a stormfuck is, but what is "high-aspect breeding?

Steve

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Now I really want a stormfuck, spinnaker.

Sails that breed would be so great too - just imagine new sails every other year for free!

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I can only wonder how bald + rocked goes with high aspect breeding and a stormfuck

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I think stormfuck is what happens when you get caught with your 140 up in 40 knots of wind.

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I know the drug-related property crime rate in Amsterdam is out of control, but this boat was "stolen every winter."  They left out "recovered every spring," but I think it's implicit.  That they kept the boat on a high crime neighborhood would explain how the hull got "rocked" in 2014.

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I'm not sure but I think I have one of those self emptying decks also.

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You need self emptying decks in Amsterdam, to get the drunks and high removed every night.

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On 11/5/2017 at 7:44 AM, Panope said:

Ok, I know what a stormfuck is, but what is "high-aspect breeding?

Steve

Sex standing up. Sometimes called 'a quick fat-head up against the wall.'

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8 hours ago, Bull City said:

^^ Leave it you, Diarmuid.

Too old for that kind of thing.  I've come to appreciate the  beauty of a low-aspect rig -- or ''yer basic Leysdown Gaffer'. It's a Sheppey kind of shippy.

(That one's for you, Mr. Ed.)

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Crikey, but that’s a hostile shore, Leysdown. There’s a so called route there called the “overland passage” which is more accurate than its other name of the “four fathom channel”. Lots of sailors have gone down there, but maybe not in the way you’re thinking. 

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My, but this has become the double entendre thread.

 

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Double Enders are good, you can use them in either direction. 

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Another doozie here, again a waarschip 1010

“Hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump?” Well I never. 


Fast and light-footed ship for a sporty sailer (headroom within 1.40 !)
2016 new code 0 (+ bowlbite) and HA 
Underwater ship of epoxy system provided.
Sail Track mast rail (hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump)
Version with bulb keel !!!
We have been sail delighted with her twelve years between landsend and Kopenhagen.
In connection with more free time (retirement) we are looking for something bigger

 

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On 11/8/2017 at 11:25 PM, 140fulton said:

Or, in the vernacular of the thread, they go both ways.

I think this thread is going sideways.

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28 minutes ago, Mr. Ed said:

Another doozie here, again a waarschip 1010

“Hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump?” Well I never. 


Fast and light-footed ship for a sporty sailer (headroom within 1.40 !)
2016 new code 0 (+ bowlbite) and HA 
Underwater ship of epoxy system provided.
Sail Track mast rail (hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump)
Version with bulb keel !!!
We have been sail delighted with her twelve years between landsend and Kopenhagen.
In connection with more free time (retirement) we are looking for something bigger

 

Those Waarschips sure seem to inspire some turgid prose.

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I think some lifelines and non-skid might solve the self emptying decks problem.

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3 minutes ago, Shu said:

I think some lifelines and non-skid might solve the self emptying decks problem.

Where's the challenge in that? Fuck that, it's not manly. Pour 10W30 all over the deck and then I'll show some respect.

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5 hours ago, Mr. Ed said:


2016 new code 0 (+ bowlbite) and HA 
 

+ bowlbite

puuORS8.png

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6 minutes ago, Diarmuid said:

+ bowlbite

puuORS8.png

She (?) looks tragic.

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24 minutes ago, Ishmael said:

She (?) looks tragic.

Empty bowl = tragedy. Basic dog math.

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On 1/11/2018 at 8:21 AM, Mr. Ed said:

Another doozie here, again a waarschip 1010

“Hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump?” Well I never. 


Fast and light-footed ship for a sporty sailer (headroom within 1.40 !)
2016 new code 0 (+ bowlbite) and HA 
Underwater ship of epoxy system provided.
Sail Track mast rail (hoarse like a sun, falling like a bump)
Version with bulb keel !!!
We have been sail delighted with her twelve years between landsend and Kopenhagen.
In connection with more free time (retirement) we are looking for something bigger

 

Looking for something bigger, said every girl, ever...

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3 hours ago, Last Post said:

Looking for something bigger, said every girl, ever...

To you maybe...  B)

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Another corker here - from spanish this time:

 

Very nice classic boat- 1 double cabin and two large rabbit hutches- convertible saloon- Equipment and documentation: Radar, VHF radio, GPS Plotter, wind equipment, wheel rudder, depth sounder, autopilot, electric anchor windlass, CQR anchor, electric refrigerator, interior and deck speakers, gas cooker, two water tanks, fresh water pump, un-installed water heater, deck shower, oversized winches, 2 bilge pumps Mainsail and Genova, Documentation in Regla: seventh Spanish list Motor Perkins 50CV.

 

 

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You may begin passage with two large rabbit hutches, but very soon the boat will be ALL rabbit hutches.

thetroublewithtribbleshd1207.jpg

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bloody awful eatin too is rabbit

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14 minutes ago, Mid said:

bloody awful eatin too is rabbit

Better than cat I'm told. Lovely story from my wife's family of a very remote-living fellow who served "rabbit stew" to unexpected visitors. One was a veterinary physiologist and recognised the bone structure - he kept his comments to a discreet miaow as they left. Feral cats are a big problem in theAustralian bush. 

I'd give you my recipe for balsamic bunny if I had the time. Would make a dead man smile. 

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too much information :wacko:

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45 minutes ago, Mid said:

bloody awful eatin too is rabbit

Rabbit's good eatin'. 

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good , you've got mine .....

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1 hour ago, Diarmuid said:

You may begin passage with two large rabbit hutches, but very soon the boat will be ALL rabbit hutches.

thetroublewithtribbleshd1207.jpg

Tribbles turn into Trump wigs! Who knew?

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1 hour ago, Mid said:

bloody awful eatin too is rabbit

Tastes like chicken

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9 hours ago, Mid said:

good , you've got mine .....

Rabbit is the Tri-tip of the Lagomorph Order.

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Mmmm. Drunk hare.

Game bunnies/hares need lots of drunking. Hutch bunnies are tender goodness.;)

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This one doesn’t even have google translate to blame:

 

“Step aboard "Nirvana" and

instantly be greeted by some gorgeous blonde walk around teak decks laid over fiberglass. Her aggressive looking and striking presence in the water is due in part to the fact that the famous German Frers designed her. She was built in the world renowned Kong & Halvorsen yard and is as stern as they come because of it.”

This isn’t a one off success in the battle against the English language: here is their mission statement - and no you don’t have to try and read it to the end.

 

Welcome to Sheldon Yacht Sales

WE ARE GLAD YOU HAVE EITHER DECIDED TO LIST YOUR VESSEL WITH US, BUY YOUR VESSEL WITH US, OR HAVE ACTUALLY DECIDED TO SMARTLY DO BOTH. WITH EXCITEMENT & HUMBLED DELIGHT WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO GUIDING YOU THROUGH THIS YACHT SALES TRANSACTION. OUR SMOOTH, PROFESSIONAL, & PROACTIVE APPROACH HAVE ENABLED US TO FULFILL COUNTLESS OF OUR PREFERRED CLIENTS YACHTING GOALS. WE HAVE A NEVER ENDING PASSION FOR SERVANT LEADERSHIP AND MAKE SURE THAT WE ALWAYS PUT YOUR NEEDS FIRST AND AT THE FOREFRONT OF OUR RELATIONSHIP. 

WEATHER YOU ARE A FIRST TIME BOATER OR AN SEASONED MARITIME PERSON: WE CAN ABSOLUTELY ENSURE YOU THAT YOUR OVERALL EXPERIENCE WITH OUR BROKERAGE FIRM IS GOING BE A STRIKINGLY POSITIVE ONE. WE TRULY HANDLE THE FACILITATION OF A VESSEL TRANSACTION WITH GRACE & DYNAMIC FINESSE, BECAUSE WE HAVE LEARNED FOR THE MOST PART THAT A YACHTS DO NOT SELL THEMSELVES AND FOR GOOD REASON. IF YACHTS COULD TALK THEY WOULD PROBABLY SAY THINGS LIKE, "Hop aboard Captain, it's time for some fun?" and, "Please do not ever sell me Captain; there is too much fun for us to have and too many places that we are yet to explore". THAT IS NEITHER HEAR NOT THEIR. NONE THE LESS, COUNTLESS BUYERS AND SELLERS ALIKE HAVE CHOSEN US OVER THE COMPETITION TO REPRESENT THEM AND THEIR RESPECTED VESSEL. THIS IS SIMPLY BECAUSE AND DUE IN PART TO THE FACT THAT WE DO WHAT OTHERS WILL NOT DO OR ARE NOT WILLING TO DO IN ORDER TO GET THE JOB DONE. COMING UP SHORT &/or EVEN FAILING TO CARRY OUT A PLANNED CHART IS SIMPLY NOT AN OPTION FOR OUR FIRM. OUR LOVELY CLIENTS DESERVE THE FINEST YACHT BROKERING SERVICES THAT THIS PLANET HAS TO OFFER & THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT THEY GET & IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO GET AS WELL. OUR ALWAYS READY & WILLING TO SERVE OTHERS ATTITUDES PROMPT INFORMATIVE & SOLUTION BASED ADVISE AS WE FACILITATE THE PROCESS OF BUYING OR SELLING YOUR YACHT. WE CAN HELP YOU FIND THE PREFECT YACHT BUT WE CAN"T FORCE YOU TO USE IT. BEING A YACHT OWNER IS ACTUALLY A PRETTY BIG RESPONSIBLY; IT TAKES YEARNING PASSION & COMMITMENT FOR THE SEAS TO GET THE MOST OUT OF YOUR YACHTING LIFE. THEREFORE, FEEL FREE TO CONTACT US FOR MORE INFORMATION ON WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE A YACHT OWNER. IT WILL NOT HURT TO JUST FIND ABOUT WHAT SOME OF THE MORE COMMON RESPONSIBILITIES ARE THAT GO ALONG WITH BECOMING A YACHT OWNER. GETTING INSIDE INFORMATION ON THE INDUSTRY ARE THE BABY STEPS TOWARD THE FUTURE OBTAINMENT OF YACHT DREAMS. FURTHERMORE, WE CAN BE AND ARE MORE OFTEN TIMES THAN NOT ARE HIRED TO SELL A YACHT THAT THE OWNER(S) DO NOT WANT TO SELL BUT HAVE TO BECAUSE OF SOME UNFORESEEN LIFE CIRCUMSTANCE. WE UNDERSTAND THAT THIS IS A DIFFICULT DECISION TO MAKE. YACHTS BECOME APART OF THE FAMILY AND THEY ARE A PLACE WHERE LIFE LONG RELATIONSHIPS ARE FORMED AND WHERE COUNTLESS CHERISHED MEMORIES ARE MADE. WE ARE HERE TO MAKE SURE THAT THE PROCESS OF SELLING YOUR BELOVED YACHT IS AS SEAMLESS, PROFESSIONAL, AND STRATEGIC AS POSSIBLE. WE WANT YOU & YOUR FAMILY TO BE ABLE TO PACKAGE ALL OF THOSE JOYOUS MEMORIES IN YOUR HEART FOR ETERNITY. WE WANT YOU TO BE ABLE TO SAY YOUR GOODBYES KNOWING THAT YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TO KEEP HER FOREVER, BUT AS FOR THOSE PRIZED MEMORIES, WELL YOU MOST CERTAINLY CAN. WITH ALL THAT BEING SAID TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE WHEN YOU ARE STILL SEAWORTHY OR HAVE A FIERCE CALLING FOR THE WATER, SO COME ON, HURRY UP, LETS GO, THE WATER AWAITS US.

 

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"Grace and dynamic finesse" - just what I look for in a broker.

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That's a hell of a mission statement. 

This part raises a few questions:

"THIS IS SIMPLY BECAUSE AND DUE IN PART TO THE FACT THAT WE DO WHAT OTHERS WILL NOT DO OR ARE NOT WILLING TO DO IN ORDER TO GET THE JOB DONE"

 

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"Start enjoying fantastic emotions"

Here is one that I saw in Wooden Boat a while back. Not as turgid as others, but worthy. I especially like the second sentence of the ad copy.

niebla.thumb.JPG.894778ef5a0d05c0c9647ec32783f8d5.JPG

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She is a beautiful boat, and I'm surprised that the copy wasn't cleaned up a little more. There are more little morsels on the web site (http://niebla-sailboat.com/):

"She has all needed systems but nothing useless, keeping the boat to the highest level of simplicity and reducing the problem risk. After 10 years of navigation all the little hick ups have been sorted out and fine-tuned and right now the boat is ready to load some groceries and go sailing."

"The boat is equipped with the required equipment to do not depend on going back to the marina during the cruising periods, a generator and a water maker provide her the power and water, and also carries a dive compressor for the enjoyment of the underwater world without having to depend on shore air charging stations."

"Her hull was built with cold moulded wood and epoxy resin, her frames and deck beams were laminated as one only piece, giving her a structural strength beyond the requirements of the loads that she has to withstand and with the 50% of her displacement in the led keel, together with a carbon fiber rig give her an optimal upright momentum that allows you to trim the sails to give her owner an unprecedented enjoyment with the sailing experience on board this boat."

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13 hours ago, Bull City said:

She is a beautiful boat, and I'm surprised that the copy wasn't cleaned up a little more. There are more little morsels on the web site (http://niebla-sailboat.com/):

"She has all needed systems but nothing useless, keeping the boat to the highest level of simplicity and reducing the problem risk. After 10 years of navigation all the little hick ups have been sorted out and fine-tuned and right now the boat is ready to load some groceries and go sailing."

"The boat is equipped with the required equipment to do not depend on going back to the marina during the cruising periods, a generator and a water maker provide her the power and water, and also carries a dive compressor for the enjoyment of the underwater world without having to depend on shore air charging stations."

"Her hull was built with cold moulded wood and epoxy resin, her frames and deck beams were laminated as one only piece, giving her a structural strength beyond the requirements of the loads that she has to withstand and with the 50% of her displacement in the led keel, together with a carbon fiber rig give her an optimal upright momentum that allows you to trim the sails to give her owner an unprecedented enjoyment with the sailing experience on board this boat."

I am willing to be quite forgiving for a beauty like that.  One picture is worth a thousand mangled words.

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Bottom line is their English is a hell of a lot better than my Spanish.

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I just noticed that the forward companionway is off center. I would love to see that defect covered in Google & Babel fashion.

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On 2/16/2018 at 9:57 AM, andykane said:

That's a hell of a mission statement. 

This part raises a few questions:

"THIS IS SIMPLY BECAUSE AND DUE IN PART TO THE FACT THAT WE DO WHAT OTHERS WILL NOT DO OR ARE NOT WILLING TO DO IN ORDER TO GET THE JOB DONE"

 

Showty & Awlcaps, Yacht Brokers. 

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On 2/20/2018 at 10:27 PM, Diarmuid said:

Showty & Awlcaps, Yacht Brokers. 

Well done!

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Here’s a fine mast. I have no idea what they mean. I also have no idea why my text is centred  
 

1980 Custom 1980 wooden boat

£ 66,742
 
Italy
 
6647542_20180315054413569_1_XLARGE.jpg&w=924&h=693&t=1521096300000
 
6647542_20180315054844585_1_XLARGE.jpg&w=924&h=693&t=1521096564000
1 / 9
 
 
 
 
 
Interested in this boat?Call NowSend Email
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  • Description
  •  
  • View Full Specifications
 
 
Year:
1980
Length:
44'
Engine/Fuel Type:
Located In:
Italy
Hull Material:
Wood
YW#:
72731-3188501
Current Price:
EUR  75,600 Tax Paid (£ 66,742) 
 

Fully restored in 2010!

Designer Axel E Nygren

Shipyard: KG Batbyggeri

Length: 13,54 m

Beam: 2,12 m

Draft: 1,6 m

Displacement: 6700 kg

Engine: Volvo Penta 6 kW, gas

Fuel capacity: 15 l

Hollow mast with the top banana, height 14,00 m

spinnaker

Mahogany wood

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Quote

Hollow mast with the top banana, height 14,00 m

 

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