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LB 15

Brisbane to Keppel 2018

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Here we go again. The NOR for the 12th edition of the Pineapple race is out...

 

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Not doing it again til Fiona buys himself a better yacht.

Yes, I am choosy      :P

 

 

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1 hour ago, LB 15 said:

Here we go again. The NOR for the 12th edition of the Pineapple race is out...

 

image.jpg

From all reports, you couldn't call that event a fight. 

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Just had a stickybeak at the NOR and was looking at the crew requirements

Quote

At least 50% of the crew including the skipper & or sailing master shall have completed a Category 1 or 2 race or an equivalent passage.

I assume that my non-stop Sydney to Melbourne delivery of my Jeanneau would be considered sufficient for the good 50%

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50% of the crew also need a mouth guard.

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3 hours ago, hoppy said:

Just had a stickybeak at the NOR and was looking at the crew requirements

I assume that my non-stop Sydney to Melbourne delivery of my Jeanneau would be considered sufficient for the good 50%

Prob should say in the last 12mths etc

2 hours ago, LB 15 said:

50% of the crew also need a mouth guard.

Is it now tag team?

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19 hours ago, LB 15 said:

Here we go again. The NOR for the 12th edition of the Pineapple race is out...

 

image.jpg

Interesting to note that World Sailing's RRS have been replaced by Marquis of Queensberry  Rules for this event.

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Prizes will be awarded for the IRC, PHS, light, middle and heavyweight divisions.

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I hear our bowman is Jeff someone. 

Says he can’t sail this weekend as he is a bit sore but promises to make weight for the race.

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35 minutes ago, lydia said:

I hear our bowman is Jeff someone. 

Says he can’t sail this weekend as he is a bit sore but promises to make weight for the race.

and he said to say that he "loves yous all"

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I heard through the grapevine ramifications from the rumble last year are far from finished and it is still lawyers at 40 paces? Surely not ???

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They are bit closer than 40 paces I believe.

Only just starting really.

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Lydia, did anything make it to a real court? 

& You & LB both need to watch some MMA. Boxing, the rumble in rocky & rocky the movie ain't real baby! 

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10 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

Fuck that is crazy shit...and I presume the club watches this shit unfold without kicking some arses into line??

What you mean, like any good club it circles the wagons and protects the chosen ones.

It's board members anyway.

The Rule 69 inquiry I imagine has been parked at the bottom of someone's drawer at AS and will never see the light of day again.

So now the personal injury and defamation matters play out in the civil courts.

Going to be expensive for someone.

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1 hour ago, lydia said:

So now the personal injury and defamation matters play out in the civil courts.

Snowflakes! 

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Could be some great new trophies though!

The Glass Jaw Cup for most underperforming big boat

The Southpaw Cup for the best performed boat not from the host club

The Jimmy Sharman Shield for best showmanship by any crew

The Mundine Plate for best radio communication by a navigator

The Rocky Balboa Cup for oldest boat in the top ten.

Possibilities are endless.

 

 

 

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Lydia, LB and Shaggy (wherever he is hiding) I don't see your boats on the entry list yet....

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3 hours ago, lydia said:

It's board members anyway

So now the personal injury and defamation matters play out in the civil courts.

That is insane.

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4 hours ago, hoppy said:

Lydia, LB and Shaggy (wherever he is hiding) I don't see your boats on the entry list yet....

I think I will go with Shaggy. We have some unfinished business after the unfortunate collision with that sun fish last year.

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17 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

Fuck that is crazy shit...and I presume the club watches this shit unfold without kicking some arses into line??

The internal hearings are finished. The Kangaroo got life.

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Seems like there money in opening a Bodyguard for Hire business up there that weekend?

I could also maybe send  Brandy, Channing, Brianna, Dakota, Bambi and Co along under a new vertically integrated business model I'm trialing?

Might have to label them so no one got the service availability mixed up and tried a reach around on Sgt Slaughter.

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Jack, deal with me , you take the security and the entertainment but the betting pool is mine.

Alternatively I take 15% of your pool for 5% of mine but you provide security for my runners.

It is just business!

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^^^Yes business it is, so I can only suggest get in early because after the girls are finished with them they won't have 5 bob collectively to argue about let alone to place a bet with. Bambi alone who sometimes goes under the monikers Alotta Fagina or Handless Marge can clean an ATM out at the blink of an eye.

I could give you a job if you like, though you would have to change that name, they will automaticaly think Chlamydia.

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Jack, last time the fight kicked off pretty quickly so they will time to get the bets on mate.

It is the undercard I am worried about.

Thinking about using LB as a rabbit, anyone can have shot at the title for $100.

That will shake out a bit like who will bet on LB and Shaggy could be good for a dive!

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1 hour ago, LB 15 said:

I think I will go with Shaggy. We have some unfinished business after the unfortunate collision with that sun fish last year.

What happens at the after party - stays at the after party. 

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1 hour ago, SCANAS said:

What happens at the after party - stays at the after party. 

Not anymore mate, plenty of mobile phone cameras now days.

Maybe that is what the NoR needs, requirements that mobile phones be left at the door.

 

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8 hours ago, hoppy said:

Lydia, LB and Shaggy (wherever he is hiding) I don't see your boats on the entry list yet....

Hoppy, we are all hoping your new ride will be entered.

Buy it in Brisvegas and do the race.

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1 hour ago, lydia said:

Not anymore mate, plenty of mobile phone cameras now days.

Maybe that is what the NoR needs, requirements that mobile phones be left at the door.

 

That was actually a joke about LB & Shaggy going home with a sun fish.

But I agree, I was at bucks party last weekend & yesterday videos started doing the rounds, who the fuck films shit a bucks party! 

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Maybe I have been looking at this wrong.

Live streaming to pay tv.

how much do you get for Funniest Home Videos?

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2 hours ago, SCANAS said:

That was actually a joke about LB & Shaggy going home with a sun fish.

But I agree, I was at bucks party last weekend & yesterday videos started doing the rounds, who the fuck films shit a bucks party! 

A guy I worked with not only had his bucks filmed, but had the video playing in one of the conference rooms in the office. People from a meeting in an adjoining room ended up taking a break from their meeting and went next door to watch the video.

This was back in 1990 before too many Australian men started growing vagina's.

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16 hours ago, lydia said:

What you mean, like any good club it circles the wagons and protects the chosen ones.

It's board members anyway.

The Rule 69 inquiry I imagine has been parked at the bottom of someone's drawer at AS and will never see the light of day again.

So now the personal injury and defamation matters play out in the civil courts.

Going to be expensive for someone.

AS would of sent their best man for that inquiry “Stand in the way”, full of piss and wind and no guts or  balls. AS finest

 

Here’s how it would of worked. “Stand in the way” would of done the following

He Would of told you what you want to hear and tell you all is good and bagged the other guy.

Then he would of talk to the next guy and  told him what he wanted to hear and bagged you and others to the other guy. 

He then would of played the “Tony Jone card“ thanks for you question now let’s move on” this is a quote from Stand in the Way him self.

Next comes  a few late night drinks at 1 or more regattas or events with who ever “Stand in the Way” feels will give him less grief in the long run if he sides with them ( quite offer the rich guy with the big mouth and brains in fare play)

He may try and get all of you in the same room for a “let’s talk and sort this out”. He’s only doing this as sport and fun (for Stand in the Way) and play with  the big mouth and have some fun and piss him off that he must give up his time to hear the truth and make you think that “Stand in the Way” is working on getting a result. Always a hidden agenda to catch the guy that’s going to get shafted off guard.

next the findings, the rich guy with no brains gets let off Scott free and the little guy gets shafted.

 

At the end of the day the guy who gets stafted is a long time sailor and know the rules and fare play better than most and will give “Stand in the Way” less grief  and then gets the shits with AS and our sport suffers in the long run. 

 

So this is how AS would of handled this matter. 

 

If it sounds like I’m fucked off with AS your right. I got shafted by “Stand in the Way”. I’m a big boy and I can handle it. 

 

Whats worse is I’ve seen “Stand in the Way”  shaft a 12 year old kid who AS, World Sailing and the World class he sails in support this kid, they all say he is a Australian  sailor, to let the rich guy ( 2 of them are from  RQ)  with no brains in fare play have there way with shafting the kid and “Stand in the Way” moves on to the next AS problem to solve.

 

No wounded our sport is suffering

 

pulpit

 

 

 

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“You are speaking on an open channel”

I’m not from round these parts and don’t know what you’re talking about but want to. Tell us what happened. You know you want to. 

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2 hours ago, Mr. Ed said:

“You are speaking on an open channel”

I’m not from round these parts and don’t know what you’re talking about but want to. Tell us what happened. You know you want to. 

Covered in last years thread. 

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4 hours ago, SCANAS said:

Covered in last years thread. 

care to summarise for those of us who are not locals ?

 

 

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1 hour ago, Hold Fast said:

opposing sides need to release a rap style diss track imo. 

 

Mariah Carey V. Eminem diss tracks were fanfuckingtastic :) 

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Anyway.... the BJ and WOXI rematch in this years race should be a hoot. As should be the Pogo and sunfish rematch. And any other rematches...

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19 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

And any other rematches...

I would like one with the big abbo kid that belted the fuck out of me in grade 5. This time I will bring a gun.

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I can’t believe it, you bunch of choirboys and wimps. I read a whole page of drivel and there’s no names of boats and I still have no idea what the “legal action” is about, and whether it involves the genes or the punches.

Call this a news channel! 

 

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10 minutes ago, Mr. Ed said:

I can’t believe it, you bunch of choirboys and wimps. I read a whole page of drivel and there’s no names of boats and I still have no idea what the “legal action” is about, and whether it involves the genes or the punches.

Call this a news channel! 

 

One boat is clearly named & Lydia mentions the legal action above. 

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45 minutes ago, Mr. Ed said:

I can’t believe it, you bunch of choirboys and wimps. I read a whole page of drivel and there’s no names of boats and I still have no idea what the “legal action” is about, and whether it involves the genes or the punches.

Call this a news channel! 

 

I did the same and gathered the Bene 40.7 'Beach Ball' was wearing the gloves in the red corner. allegedly.

not sure who was in the blue.

civil suit by the sound of it? 

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5 hours ago, SCANAS said:

At least one of them has decent legal representation so I'll leave it up to those interested to read page 3 of last years thread. 

http://forums.sailinganarchy.com/index.php?/topic/185965-brisbane-to-keppel/&page=3

 

The post that best explains it all...

I was on the thread earlier in the race but either missed or totally forgot LB's post explaining the incident. 

 

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24 minutes ago, Dark Cloud said:

ahh boat A - so it was that Russian billionare cunt

Crossing Gybes with a striped out Bene 40.7 ? 

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On ‎6‎/‎14‎/‎2018 at 2:11 PM, huwp said:

care to summarise for those of us who are not locals ?

 

 

Allegedly the story goes like this.

So a DK 46 and a First 40 sailing downwind in light air on opposite gybes.

Each boat sailing best VMG

DK 46 is on starboard

First 40 is on port

It is after sunset.

Boats converge.

Simple or not so simple!

 

 

 

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On 6/13/2018 at 1:33 PM, LB 15 said:

I think I will go with Shaggy. We have some unfinished business after the unfortunate collision with that sun fish last year.

You haven't lived till you've experienced fellatio from a sunfish. Just look at that mouth...

   MolaMolaCover.thumb.jpg.f909d28a70a1c4bd45082eb594495436.jpg

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5 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

They taste like chicken.

The swimmer or the fish?

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18 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

They taste like chicken.

SLF. TLC

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Heard there are two teams new to sailing that are looking to charter for the race.

Any prospects contact Basketball Australia

 

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Might be better to cross the finish line and start a delivery to Airlie in preparation for Hammo.

 

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9 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

Have any of you bloke's ever got a root in Kepple, giver or reciever? I'm doing a serious survey for Australian Sailing. 

I think the answer is in my signature..

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14 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

Have any of you bloke's ever got a root in Kepple, giver or reciever? I'm doing a serious survey for Australian Sailing. 

Didn't Scanas's infamous 'pig or a spit' take place in the cow paddock behind the toilet block? He went on to marry one of the other participants IIRC...

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52 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

Didn't Scanas's infamous 'pig or a spit' 

Ohhhh dear ..I will have to start a "Giver & Reciever" category.

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6 hours ago, hoppy said:

I think the answer is in my signature..

That was a Gladstone Goat. She was on holidays.

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3 hours ago, LB 15 said:

Didn't Scanas's infamous 'pig or a spit' take place in the cow paddock behind the toilet block? He went on to marry one of the other participants IIRC...

Not guilty, but there's always 2018!

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JS, dunno if this qualifies, is there any limitations on the amount of legs?

Did you know that Ukranian pigs can be stacked? I didn't train them to do this, it comes naturally. I do confess to the outfits though, that was my idea as I'm sick of having to shout all these boozer hags for the crew, they end up way too pissed anyway and what they don't remember won't hurt em. 

And I had to get two not because I'm greedy, it's just that Scanas is a fussy fucker and won't share.  

salolovers2.jpg.24416490233d86f756087403da717dce.jpg

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EDit: LB, I didn't forget you mate, and I dunno why you wanted a black one,  but it was a bitch to find.

Don't let the innocent looks deceive you, she's a wild one.

TEASER-Goat-dressed-as-Princess-Elsa.thumb.jpg.bce919c415b1e31fbf1e92778b113279.jpg  

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4 hours ago, SCANAS said:

Not guilty, but there's always 2018!

Scan I must admit before LB spilled the beans I always thought you sounded a bit giddy with something pressing at both ends.

Don't fret though your experience has raised this race up the Australian Sailing rankings...on its own by the way in Olympic standing with 2 rings for Olympic sports on the same race card. 

Seems Australian Basketball has cottoned on too.

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9 hours ago, shaggybaxter said:

EDit: LB, I didn't forget you mate, and I dunno why you wanted a black one,  but it was a bitch to find.

Don't let the innocent looks deceive you, she's a wild one.

TEASER-Goat-dressed-as-Princess-Elsa.thumb.jpg.bce919c415b1e31fbf1e92778b113279.jpg  

She has pretty eyes.

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Stop Press>

New NoR about to be issued, with big media announcement to follow.

Brisbane to Keppel Yacht Race is rebranded as Central Queensland biggest multi sport event.

A unique event bringing together sailing boxing and thanks to LB, sheep dog trials.

Prize money to be announced.

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Sheep Dog trials? LB & I def got this one in the bag. 

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So B2K is the Main Event. Whats on the undercard?

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Who is sanctioning the B2K race?

AS, MMA, WBF, IBF, WBC or WBO?

19 minutes ago, Last Post said:

So B2K is the Main Event. Whats on the undercard?

Both Ronda Rousey and John Cena will be fighting on the undercard. Not sure who they will fight, but it should be a good warm up for the main event.

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55 minutes ago, hoppy said:

Who is sanctioning the B2K race?

AS, MMA, WBF, IBF, WBC or WBO?

Both Ronda Rousey and John Cena will be fighting on the undercard. Not sure who they will fight, but it should be a good warm up for the main event.

 

Dunno but I hope I don't get drug tested!

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38 minutes ago, SCANAS said:

 

Dunno but I hope I don't get drug tested!

Your pretty safe Scan. They gave testing away after finding KY Jelly is a natural masking agent.

images (69).jpeg

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2 hours ago, SCANAS said:

 

Dunno but I hope I don't get drug tested!

Just smoke some weed and that will ensure you pass the test..

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The Keppel race is now a stage race! Inspired by the Tour De France PHS is this year in 8 stages. Read more...

This year the event will be run differently to previous years – the race will consist of eight (8) stages where yachts are scored for each stage, based on their elapsed time between the designated gates. This change will only be applied to the PHS (Performance Indicative) results. This new initiative promises to give yachts more opportunity to perform well, with 8 chances, rather than 1, to be successful in this event.

I shit you not! This would have to be the most retarded thing I have seen from the club since speed was capped at 10 knots for the River race a few years back

YCMTSU.

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9 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

The Keppel race is now a stage race! Inspired by the Tour De France PHS is this year in 8 stages. Read more...

This year the event will be run differently to previous years – the race will consist of eight (8) stages where yachts are scored for each stage, based on their elapsed time between the designated gates. This change will only be applied to the PHS (Performance Indicative) results. This new initiative promises to give yachts more opportunity to perform well, with 8 chances, rather than 1, to be successful in this event.

I shit you not! This would have to be the most retarded thing I have seen from the club since speed was capped at 10 knots for the River race a few years back

YCMTSU.

VOR Jr. !!! start getting your sponsors back !

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There will be drug testing for all winners after each stage. BJ and WOXI are going to get pissed off waiting for Olsen 40 to finish each stage before the restart. This will take days.

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18 minutes ago, LB 15 said:

The Keppel race is now a stage race! Inspired by the Tour De France PHS is this year in 8 stages. Read more...

This year the event will be run differently to previous years – the race will consist of eight (8) stages where yachts are scored for each stage, based on their elapsed time between the designated gates. This change will only be applied to the PHS (Performance Indicative) results. This new initiative promises to give yachts more opportunity to perform well, with 8 chances, rather than 1, to be successful in this event.

I shit you not! This would have to be the most retarded thing I have seen from the club since speed was capped at 10 knots for the River race a few years back

YCMTSU.

Stage 1. Cross start line in the correct direction within 30 minutes of start gun (bonus points for crossing after gun);

Stage 2. Pass Fairway Mark off Caloundra without having been involved in a Marine Incident or having been hailed by commercial shipping (bonus points for passing seaward side of Mark).

Stage 3. Leave Mudjimba Island to port without having taken on extra drinking water (bonus point if drinking water is actually taken on but no protest is lodged)

 

Futher stage bonus suggestions invited.

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Can't we just sail there as normal and then have some kind of mixed martial arts contest to decide the trophys? 

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18 minutes ago, greasy al said:

Stage 1. Cross start line in the correct direction within 30 minutes of start gun (bonus points for crossing after gun);

Stage 2. Pass Fairway Mark off Caloundra without having been involved in a Marine Incident or having been hailed by commercial shipping (bonus points for passing seaward side of Mark).

Stage 3. Leave Mudjimba Island to port without having taken on extra drinking water (bonus point if drinking water is actually taken on but no protest is lodged)

 

Futher stage bonus suggestions invited.

Too funny! 

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