Bump-n-Grind

boating dumbfuckery

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<rant>

Coming up the ditch from Ft Pierce, FL the last couple weeks in a recently purchased trawler. FL was boring, but for the most part, people on the water mostly knew what they were doing.  When I got do GA I swear I could hear banjos in the distance thru the marshes. Northern GA and the bottom of SC were really quite serene; very little traffic on the ICW. Spent a few days-nights in Charleston waiting for some truly shitty weather to roll thru. So far, most of my encounters and crossings with other boats have been quite courteous. That all stopped approaching Myrtle Beach. I have never, in almost 40 years on the water, encountered a higher concentration of idiots operating machinery. Seatow and Tow Boat US are very busy around here. My trip to Wrightsville Beach today was peppered with close encounters, at speed, with everything from jetskis to 60' sportfish to motorized canoes, all trying to get somewhere as fast as they can, with little regard to colregs much less any common sense, or basic rules of the road.  I try to slow down for situations that seem to require it and get flipped off by some idiot trying to go past me at Mach Schnell... only to see him coming back the other way 2 minutes later.

Yeah, I know I'm burning diesel, but I think 10% of the total annual fossil fuel consumption takes place along this stretch of the ICW on weekends. my burn rate is about 4.5 gal/hr some of these maroons with 6 outboards laced across their sterns have to be burning 10 times that.

I will never again complain about weekend Rodneys in Annapolis!

</rant>

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Some areas/days are Not To Be On The Water.
4th July. Ever.
Perhaps that stretch of the ICW. Ever.

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IPC (Idiots per Capita) think you be hard pressed to beat Southern Florida around Columbus Day. Like friggin moths to a flame.

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They've been waiting for the warmer weather before coming out.  You may have missed them further south because it was too early.

 

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9 hours ago, Bump-n-Grind said:

I will never again complain about weekend Rodneys in Annapolis

Yes you will.

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same on the C&D canal a couple weeks ago.  so many idiots on jet skis and cigarette type boats.  morons, it's a wonder more of em don't get killed.

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I wait for a weather windows to avoid St A to Beaufort NC on the inside stopping each night. This year I had to come in to the Cape Fear and continue on the waterway. I was early enough that the traffic was light but still a pia.

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We really enjoyed the ICW in Georgia. Beautiful, peaceful marshes and not much traffic. Harbor porpoises everywhere. Cumberland Island should not be missed. We went offshore from Charleston up to Beaufort in part based on reports like the OPs. Then the ICW from there to Norfolk was also mostly great. 

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"Ahntryeh!? This here ICW doan go ta Ahntryeh."

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8 hours ago, Navig8tor said:

IPC (Idiots per Capita) think you be hard pressed to beat Southern Florida.

Edited for simplicity.

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The Norfolk broads is coming into tourist season,  hundreds of idiots trying to get from Pub to pub sometimes drunk,  driving 40ft hired boats on a week's hire, they have had at most 30minutes training. They  have never read our equivalent of Colregs, they don't care anyway,  having paid their collision damage waver insurance. They think they can drive off after hitting anything. 

Then you Get the day boats 20ft half open boats on hourly hire, trying to get to a pub and back in the time they've purchased. No training at all.

The speed limits are 4 mph through moorings and villages 6mph elsewhere.  They're often at Max hull speed in these floating caravans / day boats , creating a huge wash. Just Occasionally you'll come across some idiot in a private speed boat going at planing speed.

Sadly there aren't enough Rangers to catch them all, and just a few get stopped  and fined each year. 

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The infection up here in the PNW isn't as broad but the symptoms of the disease are more intense. Just go into any strait in the fog and I guarantee within minutes you'll be on a collision course with a 50 foot power boat running WOT with no radar or AIS. 

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You guys should come and visit Scotland... it's freezing cold, pisses with rain most of the time and there are lots of midges... but that usually keeps the Dumbfuckery level down to pretty manageable levels... :-).

Cheers,

               W.

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2 hours ago, IStream said:

The infection up here in the PNW isn't as broad but the symptoms of the disease are more intense. Just go into any strait in the fog and I guarantee within minutes you'll be on a collision course with a 50 foot power boat running WOT with no radar or AIS. 

To find the real mindless fools here you need to go on a lake in the summer. Ski boats and Jet skiers have to be seen to be believed.

I knew a guy who was a local hero hot rodder when I was a kid - killed himself in his hot ski/drag boat running under a dock at night drunk.

Another guy got hospitalized from tubing when the driver cracked the whip with him at about 50 MPH and slung him up on the beach.

We won't even mention the powerboaters leaving the fireworks in English Bay. They should be on the short bus, not running boats.

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Hard to beat Lake of the Ozarks for dumbfuckery – this is one of my favourites

 

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There is a certain added surrealism when the dumbfucker wears a uniform, a badge and carries a gun.

 

 

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9 hours ago, doghouse said:

Yes you will.

probably

 

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2 hours ago, KC375 said:

 

And not even one bikini top blew off. :angry:

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5 hours ago, KC375 said:

There is a certain added surrealism when the dumbfucker wears a uniform, a badge and carries a gun.

That was a funny CNN reporter though.

Other very infamous ones were in San Diego on 4th July, and even more so the one further north, was it Seattle, where the police killed someone in a little sailboat at night, going at 30 kn or so, who got away with it and later became a counselor. Can't find the threads right now.

 

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35 minutes ago, Fiji Bitter said:

That was a funny CNN reporter though.

Other very infamous ones were in San Diego on 4th July, and even more so the one further north, was it Seattle, where the police killed someone in a little sailboat at night, going at 30 kn or so, who got away with it and later became a counselor. Can't find the threads right now.

 

That was Russell Perdock in Lake County.

 It seems Lake County falls below third world dictatorship rule of law standards.

Russel Perdock 2nd in command in the Sheriffs office was drunk and operating a motor boat dangerously when he hit a sailboat and killed  someone. Russel with help of the sheriffs office conspired to pin the blame on the skipper of the sailboat...lots of skullduggery. The one person in the sheriffs office trying to tell the truth was fired. Exculpatory evidence for the defence of Sailboat operator was buried and only surfaced at trial etc...

The case fell apart at trial. Ultimately the sailboat skipper succeeded in obtaining a settlement from Lake County (or their insurance company).

Russel Perdock went on to serve as Mayor and last week was appointed councillor of Clearlake, Lake County where the dumbfuckery is in all the ellected offices and appointed officials.

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16 minutes ago, KC375 said:

I think that was Lake County California

You got it, the Perdock case. Can't find the original thread, just a rather lame thread here:   

 

 

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Here’s a story- :)- we were sailing around Bainbridge Island on a broad reach in a nice 8 knot NE breeze, sunny day, and when we were about 1/2 way down the west side, six Cigarette style boats doing what looked like 60-70 knots were enjoying a high speed fleet thing, traveling North, straight at us.  As they zipped by, one of the back benchers caught a wake from the first boat- bounced off of it, and headed straight at us.  The guy at the wheel was holding a fifth of something whisky-ish looking, so ‘relaxed’ he was bouncing off the railing, saw us, but couldn’t keep his head up.  His boat rolled over to the port chine, and somehow the boat carved off of it about 20 yards from us, and the boat sliced to starboard, hard, almost capsized, and then tore off to the east, still with the throttle on, missing us by 10 yards or so, the skipper holding on to the wheel for dear life and support, and, in then what looked like an out of control slalom, commenced to disappear North with the pack.  The hull was yellow.  We reported it to the Coasties.  Nothing happened.

Gosh, is this the type of fun on the water you guys are talking about?  High powered motorboats look like fun!

 

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Ah, the sea. The last great bastion of freedom.  :rolleyes:

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9 hours ago, Grande Mastere Dreade said:

nothing, nothing y'all describe is as bad as lake lewisville in n.texas.. 

I even get worried driving over that lake on the I-35 bridge. I'm on Eagle MTN. It's not too bad.

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On 6/15/2019 at 11:14 PM, Bump-n-Grind said:

<rant>

Coming up the ditch from Ft Pierce, FL the last couple weeks in a recently purchased trawler. FL was boring, but for the most part, people on the water mostly knew what they were doing.  When I got do GA I swear I could hear banjos in the distance thru the marshes. Northern GA and the bottom of SC were really quite serene; very little traffic on the ICW. Spent a few days-nights in Charleston waiting for some truly shitty weather to roll thru. So far, most of my encounters and crossings with other boats have been quite courteous. That all stopped approaching Myrtle Beach. I have never, in almost 40 years on the water, encountered a higher concentration of idiots operating machinery. Seatow and Tow Boat US are very busy around here. My trip to Wrightsville Beach today was peppered with close encounters, at speed, with everything from jetskis to 60' sportfish to motorized canoes, all trying to get somewhere as fast as they can, with little regard to colregs much less any common sense, or basic rules of the road.  I try to slow down for situations that seem to require it and get flipped off by some idiot trying to go past me at Mach Schnell... only to see him coming back the other way 2 minutes later.

Yeah, I know I'm burning diesel, but I think 10% of the total annual fossil fuel consumption takes place along this stretch of the ICW on weekends. my burn rate is about 4.5 gal/hr some of these maroons with 6 outboards laced across their sterns have to be burning 10 times that.

I will never again complain about weekend Rodneys in Annapolis!

</rant>

I will tell you what, every one of them will slow down and salute the Stars and Bars if you fly it.

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On 6/15/2019 at 11:14 PM, Bump-n-Grind said:

<rant>

Coming up the ditch from Ft Pierce, FL the last couple weeks in a recently purchased trawler. FL was boring, but for the most part, people on the water mostly knew what they were doing.  When I got do GA I swear I could hear banjos in the distance thru the marshes. Northern GA and the bottom of SC were really quite serene; very little traffic on the ICW. Spent a few days-nights in Charleston waiting for some truly shitty weather to roll thru. So far, most of my encounters and crossings with other boats have been quite courteous. That all stopped approaching Myrtle Beach. I have never, in almost 40 years on the water, encountered a higher concentration of idiots operating machinery. Seatow and Tow Boat US are very busy around here. My trip to Wrightsville Beach today was peppered with close encounters, at speed, with everything from jetskis to 60' sportfish to motorized canoes, all trying to get somewhere as fast as they can, with little regard to colregs much less any common sense, or basic rules of the road.  I try to slow down for situations that seem to require it and get flipped off by some idiot trying to go past me at Mach Schnell... only to see him coming back the other way 2 minutes later.

Yeah, I know I'm burning diesel, but I think 10% of the total annual fossil fuel consumption takes place along this stretch of the ICW on weekends. my burn rate is about 4.5 gal/hr some of these maroons with 6 outboards laced across their sterns have to be burning 10 times that.

I will never again complain about weekend Rodneys in Annapolis!

</rant>

Considering the quality of humans I see on land in that area I'm not surprised at all!

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3 minutes ago, SloopJonB said:

"Sailboaters think that if they have the sails up and the engine off that they have the right of way"

Imagine that.

Entitled pricks. Where could they have possibly gotten such an outlandish idea?

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5 hours ago, Ajax said:

Ah, the sea. The last great bastion of freedom.  :rolleyes:

No lane markers, no speed limit signs ... no rules! Ah feels the FREEDOM coursing thru my veins! No wait, that's Red Bull and Jagermeister.

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9 minutes ago, Diarmuid said:

No lane markers, no speed limit signs ... no rules! Ah feels the FREEDOM coursing thru my veins! No wait, that's Red Bull and Jagermeister. And no accountability.

 

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I've cruised the Myrtle Beach/Carolina Beach stretch of the ICW many times, and our rule was to tie up or anchor on weekends and holidays. Too many Bubba's per sq. ft.

 

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3 hours ago, Chardonnay said:

The guy at the end of this video with the funny shirt is an idiot.

Joe Charter with lines in the water has the "right of way" over a vessel under sail? 

The problem is that other douchenozzles are getting their "expert advice" from this douchnozzle.

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There are fine people on both sides.

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38 minutes ago, DavidC59 said:

The guy at the end of this video with the funny shirt is an idiot.

Joe Charter with lines in the water has the "right of way" over a vessel under sail? 

The problem is that other douchenozzles are getting their "expert advice" from this douchnozzle.

I wonder if wingnut giving video commentary creates any liability for himself. He holds himself out as an expert and then gives advice in conflict with colregs...I don’t think I’d want to do that in a litigious place like the US. Given he monetizes the video (ads) he is a “professional” getting paid for giving his advice. (Clearly I’m not the member of any bar association)

Probably most people do not look at the comments below...if they do they will fortunately see many/majority? Of comments correct the bad advice in the vid

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18 minutes ago, DavidC59 said:

The guy at the end of this video with the funny shirt is an idiot.

Joe Charter with lines in the water has the "right of way" over a vessel under sail? 

The problem is that other douchenozzles are getting their "expert advice" from this douchnozzle.

I didn't intend that post to mean that I agree with him.  I think he is referring to Rule 18, Responsibilities Between Vessels (b) which states that  A sailing vessel underway shall keep out of the way of:  (iii) a vessel engaged in fishing.  That rule in no way applies in this case since the powerboat was clearly not engaged in fishing.  The regs are to be taken as a whole.  First, Rule 2 states, "Nothing in these Rules shall exonerate any vessel, or the owner, master or crew thereof, from the consequences of any neglect to comply with these Rules or of the NEGLECT OF ANY PRECAUTION WHICH MAY BE REQUIRED BY THE ORDINARY PRACTICE OF SEAMEN..."  In other words, you don't get to run over another boat just because a rule gives "right of way" under certain circumstances. Further, Rule 6 states, "Every vessel shall at all times proceed at a safe speed so that she can take proper and effective action to avoid collision and be stopped within a distance appropriate to the prevailing circumstances and conditions."  Rule 8, Action to Avoid Collision, (a) "Any action taken to avoid collision shall, if the circumstances of the case admit, be positive, made in ample time and with due regard to the observance of good seamanship", and (d) Action to avoid collision with another vessel shall be such as to result in passing at a safe distance."  and finally, Rule 8, (f) (iii), "A vessel, the passage of which is not to be impeded remains fully obliged to comply with the rules of this part when the two vessels are approaching one another so as to involve the risk of collision."

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1 hour ago, Cheap Beer said:

I've cruised the Myrtle Beach/Carolina Beach stretch of the ICW many times, and our rule was to tie up or anchor on weekends and holidays. Too many Bubba's per sq. ft.

 

I sailed in a much less crowded area than Myrtle Beach but even so we never went daysailing on weekends.  We saved that for weekdays or late afternoon/early evenings after the kids got home from school.  If the boat left the slip on weekends it was because we were racing somewhere.

Fall was an especially fun time as salmon were starting to move upstream to spawn.  Getting out of the harbor was often like running a gauntlet what with idiots trolling in the channel and other idiots trolling across the harbor mouth.

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On 6/16/2019 at 3:10 PM, KC375 said:

Hard to beat Lake of the Ozarks for dumbfuckery – this is one of my favourites

 

 

 

can u post a link to the non slow motion original of this? much better vid

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2 hours ago, MikeR80 said:

can u post a link to the non slow motion original of this? much better vid

 

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13 hours ago, jerseyguy said:

 

Fall was an especially fun time as salmon were starting to move upstream to spawn.  Getting out of the harbor was often like running a gauntlet what with idiots trolling in the channel and other idiots trolling across the harbor mouth.

Thankfully, our regulations say that fishermen must lift their lines when in the navigational channel to allow boats to pass (Motor or Sail) and they are not allowed to troll . Some do need reminding though.. As a harbour authority they have such powers does yours?

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On 6/17/2019 at 8:51 AM, woahboy said:

I even get worried driving over that lake on the I-35 bridge. I'm on Eagle MTN. It's not too bad.

yeah but the reasons for worrying about driving the bridge have nothing to do with the boats on the water. That whole area is a swirling matrix of stupidity both on land and on the water. 

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6 minutes ago, DarthSailor said:

yeah but the reasons for worrying about driving the bridge have nothing to do with the boats on the water. That whole area is a swirling matrix of stupidity both on land and on the water. 

You got that right. Where do you sail?

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13 minutes ago, woahboy said:

You got that right. Where do you sail?

Started on Lake Pontchartrain as a kid then moved to Big D in 1976 to 78 my folks had their boat on Lake Lewisville,  we moved away ( Ct. then Nola) ended up back in Dallas 1985 and the boat went to Texoma that time. I sailed mainly on Eagle Mtn. and Ray Hubbard with some White Rock mixed in when I was in Dallas. (J-24, J-22 circuits as well) Did my college sailing in the SEISA (called the east league now I think).  Tons of Gulf Coast/East Coast handicap stuff and made sails for a while, drifted away from sailing as kids came and got older, I try to do a couple of races a year where-ever if possible.  Now living boat-less in the wilds of Michigan. 

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Funny. I'm a native Michigander but moved south in '78. Used to race a lot out of FWBC. Santana 35, J/35, J24's. Just bought a 4KSB. '77 Seafarer. But I like it. Lazyboy with sails. I lived in Grosse Pointe Farms when I was in NI.

Cheers

Jim

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This counts too, right? 

 

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2 hours ago, woahboy said:

Funny. I'm a native Michigander but moved south in '78. Used to race a lot out of FWBC. Santana 35, J/35, J24's. Just bought a 4KSB. '77 Seafarer. But I like it. Lazyboy with sails. I lived in Grosse Pointe Farms when I was in NI.

Cheers

Jim

Which Seafarer...?  We had a 1972 24' fin keel (first one built).  Lots O memories...

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19 minutes ago, sail69 said:

Which Seafarer...?  We had a 1972 24' fin keel (first one built).  Lots O memories...

It's a 26. I really like it. Doesn't have an inboard so it doesn't smell. It's from '77. The first year of production.seafarer_stbd.jpg.efca5623443b6e0d48c7c6b8cbb02697.jpg

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12 hours ago, The Q said:

Thankfully, our regulations say that fishermen must lift their lines when in the navigational channel to allow boats to pass (Motor or Sail) and they are not allowed to troll . Some do need reminding though.. As a harbour authority they have such powers does yours?

Harbor cops simply enforce the state boating regs and whatever county specific regs may be in place  Don’t know the specifics .

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On 6/18/2019 at 3:59 PM, woahboy said:

It's a 26. I really like it. Doesn't have an inboard so it doesn't smell. It's from '77. The first year of production.seafarer_stbd.jpg.efca5623443b6e0d48c7c6b8cbb02697.jpg

good looking boat..unlike the "Futura" deck which was hideous...not our boat but same look;

 

image.jpeg.68d9507434ad1f3797bf1a199dd76637.jpeg

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On 6/18/2019 at 4:09 AM, seabell said:

 

I have to say every time I see this longer version, I'm kind of impressed by the way the woman in the yellow green bikini takes control of the situation, checking on the casualties and organising help.

At least one sensible brain on board...

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She was probably the only one that wasn't concussed - a lot of heads hit things there.

When it first showed up there was a story attached - some broken bones and hospitalizations IIRC.

If you watch the driver, he is cutting & jamming the throttles - must have been jumping waves at warp speed and wasn't good enough.

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Love the drivers boss of the universe expression and it’s feckin lucky he cut the throttles at the beginning of the chine walk or there would’ve been fatalities .

good example of why wrist lanyards are a valuable safety tool . It wouldn’t have prevented what happened in the video above .

i wonder if he kept the boat ? And do you think green bikini girl kicked him to the kerb ? 

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Love how the guy in the red hat with the beer in the back starts out all macho, standing there with the dumb grin on his face.  Then he realizes that there is no way in hell his hat is gonna stay on or that he will be able to keep his beer.  He sinks to the seat with a wtf look on his face.  He and the guy in blue probably have the the safest place on the boat, and they still wack their heads on the coming.  Wonder if he spilled his beer.  

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I have watched that 100 times and keep finding funny shit if not for the dead fish impersonation of the driver...  The guy in blue and guy in shades in middle wack their heads not once, but twice on the gunnel/window trim.  They gotta be in concussion protocol.  :lol: 

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6 hours ago, alphafb552 said:

I have to say every time I see this longer version, I'm kind of impressed by the way the woman in the yellow green bikini takes control of the situation, checking on the casualties and organising help.

At least one sensible brain on board...

She is the mom

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9 hours ago, sail69 said:

good looking boat..unlike the "Futura" deck which was hideous...not our boat but same look;

 

image.jpeg.68d9507434ad1f3797bf1a199dd76637.jpeg

Thank You. I like her.

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2 hours ago, shaggy said:

Love how the guy in the red hat with the beer in the back starts out all macho, standing there with the dumb grin on his face.  Then he realizes that there is no way in hell his hat is gonna stay on or that he will be able to keep his beer.  He sinks to the seat with a wtf look on his face.  He and the guy in blue probably have the the safest place on the boat, and they still wack their heads on the coming.  Wonder if he spilled his beer.  

The red hat is important. Is it a MAGA hat? If it is that describes the whole situation.

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1 hour ago, woahboy said:

The red hat is important. Is it a MAGA hat? If it is that describes the whole situation.

I think that vid is pre-MAGA.

It's the red hat equivalent of a training bra.

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