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      Abbreviated rules   07/28/2017

      Underdawg did an excellent job of explaining the rules.  Here's the simplified version: Don't insinuate Pedo.  Warning and or timeout for a first offense.  PermaFlick for any subsequent offenses Don't out members.  See above for penalties.  Caveat:  if you have ever used your own real name or personal information here on the forums since, like, ever - it doesn't count and you are fair game. If you see spam posts, report it to the mods.  We do not hang out in every thread 24/7 If you see any of the above, report it to the mods by hitting the Report button in the offending post.   We do not take action for foul language, off-subject content, or abusive behavior unless it escalates to persistent stalking.  There may be times that we might warn someone or flick someone for something particularly egregious.  There is no standard, we will know it when we see it.  If you continually report things that do not fall into rules #1 or 2 above, you may very well get a timeout yourself for annoying the Mods with repeated whining.  Use your best judgement. Warnings, timeouts, suspensions and flicks are arbitrary and capricious.  Deal with it.  Welcome to anarchy.   If you are a newbie, there are unwritten rules to adhere to.  They will be explained to you soon enough.  

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Dr. Death?

157 posts in this topic

Death: "Now's it's high time for you, Deed of Gift, to come with me, complimments of Ernesto"

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'NEXT F@#KER THAT WAKES ME IN A POWERBOAT DIES!"

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not a caption but..

 

we should add this guy to the rear in our kiddo sailing program races. That will get those little runts moving.

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Frustrated with that 4-knot shitbox Lookfar, Ged the Wizard tries out his new 505.

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ERNESTO ITS DEATH, TIME TO CROSS THE RIVER HADES, WHY? LARRY SHOT YOU FROM BEHIND.

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Luke...........Luke...........join me on the dark side................

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I wonder if anyone would notice if I pulled the underwear out of my ass crack..... Oh, there's a nice puff.... Damn, I could go for a beer right now. Damn Father Time and his leebow B.S. !

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Meanwhile, over on the dark side Ernesto tries dinghy sailing....

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just let some facker put this in the ugly sails thread.

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A snapshot of Larry Ellison's nightmare staring Ernesto Bertarelli.

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No dickhend! I said "C-O-K-E" not "CLOAK" for crying out loud!

 

Goddamit! I hope you like your rum straight buddy!

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The devil went down to the lake

He was lookin' for a soul to steal

He was in a bind

'Cause he was way behind

And he was willin' to make a deal

 

When he came upon this young man

Trapezing' on a skiff and playin' it hot

And the devil jumped

Up on a foil moth

And said boy let me tell you what

 

I guess you didn't know it

but I'm a sailer too

And if you care to take a dare I'll make a bet with you

 

Now you ride a pretty good skiff, boy

But give the devil his due

I'll bet a case of rum

Against your soul

'Cause I think I'm better than you

 

The boy said my name's Johnny

And it might be a sin

But I'll take your bet

And you're gonna regret

'Cause I'm the best there's ever been

 

Johnny rosin up your bow and sail your skiff hard

Cause hell's broke loose out on the lake and the devil deals the cards

And if you win you get this shiny case of rum

But if you lose the devil gets your soul.

 

[instrumental]

 

The devil sheeted in his main

And he said I'll start this show

And fire flew from his fingertips

As he rosined up his bow

 

Then he reached his moth across the lake

And it made a [sic] evil hiss

And a band of demons joined in

And it sounded something like this

 

[instrumental]

 

When the devil finished

Johnny said well you're pretty good old son

Just sit right in that berth right there

And let me show you how it's done

 

He played Fire on the water

Run boys, run

The devil's on the lake of the Rising Sun

Seagull on the marina picken' out dough

Granny does your grand daughter bite

No child, no

 

[instrumental]

 

The devil bowed his head

Because he knew that he'd been beat

And he laid that case of rum

On the ground at Johnny's feet

 

Johnny said, Devil just come on back

If you ever wanna try again

I done told you once you son of a bitch

I'm the best there's ever been

 

He played Fire on the water

Run boys, run

The devil's on the lake of the Rising Sun

Seagull on the marina picken' out dough

Granny does your grand daughter bite

No child, no

 

…well not yet anyway.

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RaoulD finally posts a picture of himself sailing, testing his damn aso/leebow bulllshit. Put the chute up already!

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Oh, the possibilities. The winner of this contest gets a Camet shirt. Have fun.

"Little girl want a piece of candy?"

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Oh, the possibilities. The winner of this contest gets a Camet shirt. Have fun.

 

 

I KNEW they sent the Metocean tracker adrift, I've finally found the Cheese Scow!! Void-Ho!!!

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Dead CALM!?....Dead CALM!!!? ....I know its goddamwell dead CALM!!!.. Same as last time!! Same as the time before that!! ....Same as NEXT time!!!! ARRGGGGGG!!!!

 

Bruce

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Well, Mr. Death I still don't regret posting those comments on that forum... so what happens next?

I'm glad you asked. It will take us about 3 weeks to get out to the starting area of course D where I will drop you off on your boat and you will wait there for all eternity for the breeze to fill in.

Don't worry your crew will do all the talking.

Whats that smell?

Your wetsuit... its from hell. I think you will also find that the zipper is stuck.

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POD realizes he should quit sailing and take up fishing after the fleet sees through his desguise and ditches him for the nth time.

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GREAT WAY TO MEET CHICKS MY ASS!!!.....

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"PLEASE FLIPPER, JUST A COUPLE MORE MILES"...."I CAN SEE THE FINISH LINE!"....

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HEY GUYS, KEEP THE BAR OPEN TILL "MR. PARTY" ARRIVES!

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For all you newbies and old salts,

 

1. Can you sail DEAD down wind faster than the wind?

 

2. If you only have a large stick in your hand and the cape on your back and you want to know your exact location on our beautiful bay, what do you do?

 

3. If you drill a 1 inch hole in your ass, how long will it take you to sink? Will you sink faster with one, two inch hole, or two one inch holes? Never mind, just stick the tiller in it.

 

DEAD Sea Yacht Club - doublereefing wanted

 

Is he back yet?

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Earlier in the day, Bill had protested Ernie for being over the line at the start. Ernie then pinched Bill at the windward mark, bringing about another flag. When Ernie failed to give room when to windward of Bill and overlapped, Bill had had enough and called to his trimmer to retrieve "The Protest Flag of Death."

 

No beers were had at the clubhouse that evening.

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tin can tri was supposed to be in today

 

looks like i'll have to wait a bit

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"just wait til i catch you, farr 40"

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none shall dare take me up at the line

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aside from his preferred pasttime of catching sunfish and wacking heads, Grim found pleasure in small craft sailing

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maybe i should have bought the spin as well as the pole before taking that old guys life...

 

 

or

 

 

for death, there just wasn't enough wind to shake a stick at.

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Afraid of being entangled in any more lengthy arbitration problems, US Sailing signs a pact to bring stronger judging to all events

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Fuck off!

 

Come to my side.

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Oh, the possibilities. The winner of this contest gets a Camet shirt. Have fun.

 

If I could just cast that far I could hitch a ride with those bigger boats!

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First, the breeze died...

 

In a small boat not far in front of me a dark cloaked figure raised to standing and in a strange way began pissing into the lake, at the same time with what looked like shy handle of a in his right pointed up and ahead , he began to whistle?!!!

 

Well, then all hell broke loose, boats capsizing all over the place . As we struggled to get ours back up I could see this one guy way out in front, planning and headed straight at the mark with a black cloak flapping around what looked like bleached white bones...

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Yoda you bumble head .... I said Return to the Sith .... not the skiff, now get me off this contraption.

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Use the force .... use the force ... why couldn't you check check the forecast like those buggers in front

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I have the skiff , I have the magic wand , why won't you foil boat?

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