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i'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting

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Would fit right in here........Florida..........maybe a sailor?

 

(772):

Are you proud of yourself?

 

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(206):

 

No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.

 

 

 

(705):

 

It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.

 

 

(705):

 

Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!

 

 

 

(267):

 

do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?

 

Sometimes I wish I was in my 20's...

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(512):

 

I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?

 

 

 

(910):

 

Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.

 

 

 

(423):

 

So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.

(I wonder how that happened)

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543):

So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?

 

(256):

Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.

 

(543):

You are an idiot.

 

 

 

(574):

I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.

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(763):

No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested

 

(612):

Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us

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543):

So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?

 

(256):

Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.

 

(543):

You are an idiot..

This one made me laugh right loud in the middle of a meeting.

Edited by artie_pitt

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(763):

No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested

 

(612):

Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us

 

 

I'm gonna save that one. :P

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It's a good day down at TFLN. Lots of quality stuff

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(562): I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.

 

 

Gaytor lives!!!!

 

(530): It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.

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(262):

I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.

 

(224):

That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.

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(701):

Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress

 

 

 

(323):

Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"

 

 

 

(sometimes nerds do get lucky!!)

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(845): should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"

 

(717): So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.

 

(617): Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.

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...

 

(617): Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.

 

Hmmm... Coming soon:

 

(617) guy for President!

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(402):

sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut

 

(Yeah....good luck with that) (Fukin OUCH!!)

 

(248):

I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.

Go Michigan!

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(305):

Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.

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Au contrair monfrier

 

I had an insane craving for an omelette one year in kw.. It was 3 am and I went to Denny's. Had a bacon and cheese omelette and an order of French toast and walked back home and went to sleep-

 

No drugs no alcohol-

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Guest

agreed. I've gone to Denny's on occasion when I wasn't shitfaced. In fact, often a Denny's B-fast run was the order of the day before a long hike in the desert. Egg's over my Hammy was a particular fav.

 

Edit: Waffle house or White Castle was the usual drunken end of the night spot. That or Taco bell drive thru.....

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Oakland. 3 AM. Just drove nonstop from LA. OYC bar closed. Freakin' owner had nothing to eat on the boat. Denny's. We're the only crackers for 10 miles.

 

Food was actually pretty good. Everyone friendly. Staff kept peeking in the dinning area to see if we'd been killed yet.

 

Rigging knives on the belts helped.

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Man, if you guys actually go to Denny's (and then comment about how good the food is), you really need to get out more.

 

There have to be a few dozen places around me open till all hours of the night (some 24/7) that offer more than the boring menu at that chain.

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That was a LONG time ago. Oakland wasn't quite the shithole it is now - and at 3:00, Denny's was just about it.

 

Then again, if I'm up at 3 AM now, I pee and go back to bed.

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That was a LONG time ago. Oakland wasn't quite the shithole it is now - and at 3:00, Denny's was just about it.

 

Then again, if I'm up at 3 AM now, I pee and go back to bed.

 

How old are you? Oakland has been a shithole since just after Jack London was roaming its streets.

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That was a LONG time ago. Oakland wasn't quite the shithole it is now - and at 3:00, Denny's was just about it.

 

Then again, if I'm up at 3 AM now, I pee and go back to bed.

Brother, stop now. You are my future.

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Au contrair monfrier

 

I had an insane craving for an omelette one year in kw.. It was 3 am and I went to Denny's. Had a bacon and cheese omelette and an order of French toast and walked back home and went to sleep-

 

No drugs no alcohol-

yeah im gonna go call bullshit on that one...

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