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"Black and yellow,

Black and yellow,

Dressed up like a bumble-bee,

Black and yellow, Black and yellow,

I'm the flying fairy dork

who whispers to the boys Hard-alee"...

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"Shifting up a gear was not meant literally..."

 

"I hope I'm not photographed at this moment, that would be awkward..."

 

no no there are numerous ways to keep yourself busy, you've got the limbo, pole vault and high jump. and that's only for during daytime! wait till i tell and show the nighttime activities....

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"...Because they told me to stay the hell off the bow."

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Hortensia: n. A male dancer's step in which the dancer jumps into the air with the legs drawn up, one in front of the other, then reverses their position several times before landing-

Grant G. "Technical Manual ond Dictionary of Classical Ballet" 1967. Dover Publications, New York. pg 62

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We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

 

 

"You're below the line, come up, come up,....GODDAMMIT COME UP!"

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Long time Army skydiving team member forgets to pack the chute! <_<

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We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

 

"Another fucking jybe set!?...Oh Toto, there's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place li......"

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We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

 

Drive, HUGE LIFT

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We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

 

Drive...DRIVER, HUGE LIFT, head up, up like this!

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Oh shit... compared to my dick these tell tales are stiff... break out the blue diamonds

 

Introducing the newest Village Person: Super Gay Bow Gimp

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I don't always have a Pre-Race Beverage (PRB)…

but when I do…

I choose Willy Wanka Fizzy lifting drinks.

Stay thirsty my light footed sailors!

physics_wonka.png

 

 

 

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EXT. A SAILBOAT BOBBING IN A CALM BENEATH A SOUR, OVERCAST SKY, HALFWAY BETWEEN THE START AND THE WEATHER MARK – DAY

 

BOW MAN at the pointy end of the boat (the "bow"), shivering in his expensive dry suit, contemplated the tiny nip of rum left in his flask. Should he nip the nip? Or does NEPTUNE need a little encouragement to get the day moving along? BOW MAN unscrews the flask, screws NEPTUNE , downs the last drop of Cap'n Morgan.

 

What's that on the horizon? The distant water ripples 'neath the morning glow. BOW MAN hops to his feet in wonder.

 

BOW MAN

Winds in the east, mist coming in,

like somethin' is brewin' and bout to begin.

Can't put me finger on what lies in store,

but I fear what's to happen all happened before. . . .

The ripple races across the expanse like a ghost, turning the watery mirror into a froth of chop. "HA HA!" thinks BOW MAN. "I pay tribute to no king of the deep! I'm King Of The Air" BOW MAN leaps into his new domain.

 

BOW MAN (to crew)

HA HA! Yipee! Step in time! Step in time! Come on mateys, step in time!

BOW MAN (to 'imself)

Chim chiminy, chim chiminy chim chim cheroo

I does what I likes, and I likes what I do!

NEPTUNE doesn't likes what BOW MAN does. NEPTUNE doesn't like impertinence and HE doesn't like dissenting rebellious upstarts either. And while NEPTUNE prefers Mt. Gay to Cap'n Morgan, HE really does insist on being paid, regardless of how inferior the coin might be. HE's a reasonable tax collector; HE'll even accept Bacardi.

 

So NEPTUNE waits, waits for that perfect moment, waits until BOW MAN hops, then NEPTUNE smashes BOW MAN's boat flat, sails touching the water everywhere. And HE holds it there. BOW MAN succumbs to gravity, lands on slippery, sloped fiberglass, falls into the drink. NEPTUNE lets go of the boat, which rights itself on BOW MAN's noggin.

 

NEPTUNE's feeling a bit giddy, decides to address the fleet.

 

NEPTUNE

All right, ladies an' gents! Comical poem! Suitable for the occasion, extemporized and thought up before your very eyes! All right, 'ere we go! Room 'ere for everyone. Gather around. The constable - responstable! Now 'ow does that sound? Hmmm, 'ow 'bout this? I asked for a nip, and nothing he gave, and now I'll smash all of you flat with a wave! What you think o' that? There once was a man from Des Moines. . . .

FADE TO BLACK

 

THE END

 

 

Ding! Ding! --- Nice Caption.

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This is one of the common symptoms of the taskless bowman in the assymetrical spinnaker era.

 

 

We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

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"fly like a butterfly.

sting like a bee. "

whatever.

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"THAT SHOT OF MT GAY GAVE ME A DICK TWITTER".

 

(quote stolen from Beer Me...@ red fox regatta 2009)

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol: (crew laughter)

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Ernesto from the stern: So you just think lovely, happy thoughts and up you go?

Bowman Peter: Yes, but first I must blow fairy dust on you!

Ernesto: Sailing, Flowers.... Candy!

Peter: No no! Lovelier thoughts Ernesto!

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We're sure what the hell this dork is doing, but we figure y'all can come up with a good story. Have at it. Pic thanks to Christophe Favreau.

Wow! It's a lot different on a keelboat! I should'a brought my trapeze harness anyway!

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I want to ride my bicycle! I want to ride my bike! Oh, and I also want to skip rope to my invisible jump rope! Did you just take my picture? Give me that fucking camera!!!

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"THAT SHOT OF MT GAY GAVE ME A DICK TWITTER".

 

(quote stolen from Beer Me...@ red fox regatta 2009)

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol: (crew laughter)

 

 

Did I mention beerme is foredeck and a member of the foredeck union? Is this activity covered by union contract? :o

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"That 220 volt electric plate on the foredeck can be a real motivator, but it's a shame that we're down to our last bowman."

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Arthur hates his new owner activated anti gravity vest

 

or

 

Alphonse proves again that he knows nothing about fixing gas stoves!

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As Dorky floated down on to the deck, thinking "We'er not in Kansas any more!" some one on the rail started yelling

" Get off my bow !!! GET Off MY BOW ... NOW !!!"

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I just put this sail up and I won't change change it again. I wont. I WON'T, I WON'T, I WON'T!!!!

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Flappy bowman syndrome - Its not a complete day out on the water without your bowman losing his cool at least once. This one must have had a bad day.

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Quantum Sails.

 

Our sails are as light as a fairey.

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Doug Lord discovers his lead mine still won't foil but thinks it might wave jump...

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That is Alex Symes!

 

Looks like he is practicing the elevator jump on deck. You all know what i am talking about.

 

What goes up must come down. I'd love to see the landing.

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"Hey, guys, the new high tech material in this mainsail looks just like a trampoline."

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"look my new flashy bowmans' harness even has these cool quick release tog.....PING............BUMP!........ "FUCKWIT!!" "

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OK your new inflatable life jackets have a helium cannister. You pull the.... not yet Bowman!

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who says white men can,t jump?

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Contrary to popular belief, this is not a TS (Transcendental Sailing) technique ... this is a foul weather preparation maneuver called "GAY REEFING" the Genoa.

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