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Police Dragnet Grabs Butterworth's Bodyguard


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#1 Te Kooti

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 08:10 PM

Wayne Tempero, bodyguard to Ernesto Bertarelli and Brad Butterworth, has been arrested in dawn raids at Coatesville - just north of Auckland (and not far from Core Builders in Warkworth).

You will remember Mr. Tempero's lurking presence during the LV-P series in Auckland.

His "fightimes" website describes his close friendship with Bertarelli and Butterworth.

NZ Police raids were conducted in conjunction with the FBI.

The plan is to close down an Internet file-sharing site called "Megaupload.com."

Until recently, Tempero was a director of this company.

This (edited for brevity) from the New Zealand Herald.


Posted Image

Kim Dotcom. Photo / Greg Bowker


A dawn raid that landed internet mogul Kim Dotcom in jail was timed for his birthday celebration so his party guests could also be locked up.

Police pursued Dotcom through his $30 million mansion to find him sheltering in a panic room where there was a shotgun.

An estimated $17 million in art, cars and cash was seized in Auckland as part of the global operation. More than $100m was seized around the world.

Police moved on Dotcom (also known as Kim Schmitz) at the urging of United States authorities, who shut down Dotcom's Mega websites - some of the most popular filesharing websites in the world.

US authorities moved after gaining an indictment alleging Dotcom, six staff and his companies were in a "Mega Conspiracy" of racketeering, money laundering and copyright breaches worth US$620 million in missed royalty payments.

They further claimed there was US$200m in money earned through crime, and that Dotcom himself made about US$55m from the sites last year.

US officials want to extradite Dotcom and the three other men arrested this week. They will appear in court tomorrow to seek bail. Three further men are still wanted by police.

Detective Inspector Grant Wormald, of the Organised & Financial Crime Agency New Zealand, said the planning of the raid was timed around Dotcom's 38th birthday celebrations, intended for yesterday.

"Intelligence had told us that when he has a birthday party most of the people who were indicted (in the US) would be at his party."

He said the raid had netted four out of the seven named in the US indictment.

Wormald said planning focused on speed to ensure "evidence" was not destroyed, which led to the use of two helicopters to get armed officers into the mansion quickly.

He said officers got off the helicopter and identified themselves as police while approaching the house.

Officers entered the house and saw Dotcom at the top of the stairs. He said officers again shouted they were police. "He chose to run back into the bedroom."

Wormald said police had to get through electronic locks on the bedroom door and saw Dotcom disappearing into another room. When police entered that room, it was empty.

Police searched and found signs of a "safe room" - also called a "panic room". Officers broke into the room and found Dotcom inside.

"The concern for us was there was a firearm in there," said Wormald. "The shotgun was in the room and it was close to where he was seated."

It was one of two shotguns seized from the mansion by police.

Officers also arrested personal protection specialist Wayne Tempero, 55, and charged him with possession of a restricted weapon. He is due in court on Thursday.

The Herald on Sunday has learned both weapons were found by police in gun safes.

Wormald said three FBI agents and an FBI lawyer had been in New Zealand over the last week. They had not been personally involved in the raid.

The agents had spoken to some of the men in cells as they waited to appear in court on Friday, after the men "indicated they wanted to speak to the FBI".

The case has given an insight into the lifestyle of the eccentric and wealthy internet tycoon. Neighbours watched as luxury cars worth $6m were taken away.

Dotcom was a gregarious character who stood out in the neighbourhood, sometimes raising the ire of locals due to alleged speeding near the property and parties at the mansion.

By David FisherCopyright ©2012, APN Holdings NZ Limited

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#2 scassani

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 09:10 PM

Take a look at the Mercedes SUV in the righthand photo. What is the chrome panel beneath the bumper? I don't recall seeing such a device in photos Mercedes furnishes to car magazines. What is it and why would an owner add it? If it's purpose is to take the force of striking a rock while driving off-road, why would the owner pay a premium to have it chromed? On second thought, the device does not appear strong enough to take much of an impact. Any thoughts?

#3 ~Stingray~

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 09:25 PM

^ A spare mirror for BB?

:)

#4 Indio

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 09:52 PM

Take a look at the Mercedes SUV in the righthand photo. What is the chrome panel beneath the bumper? I don't recall seeing such a device in photos Mercedes furnishes to car magazines. What is it and why would an owner add it? If it's purpose is to take the force of striking a rock while driving off-road, why would the owner pay a premium to have it chromed? On second thought, the device does not appear strong enough to take much of an impact. Any thoughts?


It's an after-market aluminium chip/stone deflector.

#5 Te Kooti

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 10:16 PM

This from www.fighttimes.com where Tempero and his mates describe the thrill of being up-close and personal with Alinghi. For them, "etiquette and protocol" is important:

"The Alinghi Syndicate could only be described as the ultimate principles as they respected the value of close protection and hired only the best to protect them.

They were the most approachable clients a close protection specialist could ever hope to work with. Mr. Ernesto Bertarelli ensured the close protection team was a working part of the challenge and his influence was the norm right through all departments of the operation.

Mr. and Mrs. Bertarelli are the nicest people and very much enjoy life associating with people of all races and positions genuinely. They know how to look after their staff and guests and it was a pleasant change to be associated with such distinguished people that cared for everyone’s welfare and were prepared to consider their close protection teams advice, understand it and support the required plans.

The detail and shift leaders were responsible for the plans, formulation and presentations and briefings to Mr. Bertarelli and the sailing and management team and received their full attention and support.

We could learn much from the Bertarelli’s and the Swiss Syndicate about etiquette, protocol and most importantly how to treat people and understand them"



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#6 ncs

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Posted 21 January 2012 - 11:02 PM

Tempero didn't have a license to carry? That's funny. He was wearing a holster whenever I saw him. Maybe it held his Blackberry.

#7 sunseeker

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 12:35 AM

^ A spare mirror for BB?

:)


Forget that, look at the license plates on these cars, Mafia and Hacker. Kim Dotcom was just asking to get put in jail, or killed.

#8 maxmini

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 02:46 AM

Whoopise . Looks like i need a new source for porn :)

Posted Image

#9 Te Kooti

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 05:39 AM

Whoopise . Looks like i need a new source for porn :)

Posted Image


I wonder if Tempero persuaded any of his AC buddies to invest in the company.

If so, it would not be the first time AC personalities have drifted to the dark side.

Remember Raoul Gardini?

#10 dogwatch

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 07:27 AM


Are You Known By The Company You Keep?

Anyone with a serious interest in that question and the AC scene might look into the Russian energy industry. Not me. I couldn't possibly comment.

#11 umpire

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 10:10 AM

Pray tell me what the point of this thread is?

#12 dogwatch

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 11:29 AM

^

TK can really hold a grudge......and its a slow news day. I will leave him to tell the story, or not, which long-term SAACers will already know.

#13 Albatros

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 01:33 PM

:rolleyes: Murdoch couldn't hold a candle to Hastings, but then Murdoch can have any candy ass he wants anytime and Hastings is still in the wanking stage :lol:

#14 Tony-F18

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 02:21 PM

Kimble (Kim Scheitz) is one colorful character though, I would love for him to start an AC campaign ;)
Having mixed feelings on this raid though, the US have started their big attack on the free Internet with laws like SOPA etc and the shutdown of megaupload is just one big political show.
I find it a bit strange that the FBI can just order anyone to get arrested without any solid evidence (the megaupload case is very weak).
Another recent example is of an English teenager who ran a website with download links to TV series, he is now facing extradition to the US even though the website isnt even hosted there!



#15 Te Kooti

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 07:39 PM

Having mixed feelings on this raid though, the US have started their big attack on the free Internet with laws like SOPA etc and the shutdown of megaupload is just one big political show.



Mixed feelings? Yes, me too.

But, in this case there is a worrying conjunction of male ego, big display, big (maybe illicit) money + guns, swagger + whatever else police have found during their searches.

It is the combination Tempero finds attractive.

And I doubt this is just an Internet-related matter. It shows all the signs of spilling into other areas.

There was a time when the most serious crime in NZ involved blokes nicking a lamb for dinner.

But, with globalization and the 1980s embrace of radical right (i.e. Milton Friedman) socio-politics and economics, NZ has became a refuge for dodgy characters. And a site for the manufacture and use of drugs.

Years ago I went to Mt. Eden prison (in Auckland) and did a study on alias use amongst inmates. As hypothesized, those using one or more aliases had longer (and more serious) criminal records than those without (which means we on SA should congratulate Peter Huston!). Alias use is a durable predictor of criminality.

This German NZ'er known as "Kim Dotcom" is an interesting character. But why would anyone own luxury cars with vanity plates saying MAFIA, HACKER, CEO ?

Unlike the United States NZ does not permit people to carry arms. So, if Butterworth's mate Tempero is found guilty of touting a pistol, there is a problem.

While discussing this let us remember it is all "alleged." Thus far, there have been no guilty pleas.

Even so, I can assure you a lot of NZ'ers are concerned about the frayed social fabric in their homeland.

#16 Te Kooti

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 09:03 PM

Monday in NZ. And more on the Dotcom lifestyle:

http://www.nzherald....jectid=10780514



#17 Danno

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Posted 22 January 2012 - 11:56 PM


Having mixed feelings on this raid though, the US have started their big attack on the free Internet with laws like SOPA etc and the shutdown of megaupload is just one big political show.



Mixed feelings? Yes, me too.

But, in this case there is a worrying conjunction of male ego, big display, big (maybe illicit) money + guns, swagger + whatever else police have found during their searches.

It is the combination Tempero finds attractive.

And I doubt this is just an Internet-related matter. It shows all the signs of spilling into other areas.

There was a time when the most serious crime in NZ involved blokes nicking a lamb for dinner.

But, with globalization and the 1980s embrace of radical right (i.e. Milton Friedman) socio-politics and economics, NZ has became a refuge for dodgy characters. And a site for the manufacture and use of drugs.

Years ago I went to Mt. Eden prison (in Auckland) and did a study on alias use amongst inmates. As hypothesized, those using one or more aliases had longer (and more serious) criminal records than those without (which means we on SA should congratulate Peter Huston!). Alias use is a durable predictor of criminality.

This German NZ'er known as "Kim Dotcom" is an interesting character. But why would anyone own luxury cars with vanity plates saying MAFIA, HACKER, CEO ?

Unlike the United States NZ does not permit people to carry arms. So, if Butterworth's mate Tempero is found guilty of touting a pistol, there is a problem.

While discussing this let us remember it is all "alleged." Thus far, there have been no guilty pleas.

Even so, I can assure you a lot of NZ'ers are concerned about the frayed social fabric in their homeland.


TK, read the info available properly, the guns mentioned we're shotguns in properly constructed gun safes. Who care? So the guys got ego, money and some flash cars, again who really cares? If Uncle Sams gonna be charging him with conspiracy and copyright with threats of way more than 20 years in jail, surely he should be looking far more closely at his own banking system and look to charge those banks that have failed to prevent illegal funds being channeled through their facilities. Oh, and tell those pricks from the FBI who are down here to piss off home as well!

#18 Sailabout

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 12:19 AM

In the UK that Blair clown got his blind minister to sign an agrement that the US can issue an arrest warrant for a UK resident and just ship them back without any due process

#19 Tony-F18

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 12:36 AM

In the UK that Blair clown got his blind minister to sign an agrement that the US can issue an arrest warrant for a UK resident and just ship them back without any due process

That was the case of Richard O'Dwyrer I was referring to earlier, absolutely insane that people can get extradited for something as silly as copyright infringement.
http://www.dailymail...ars-chains.html

#20 ~Stingray~

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 01:11 AM

SOPA is way over-reaching but MegaUpload is to my understanding a quite blatant stealer of expensive, copyrighted material. Still, enforcement of local laws should for sure be by local enforcement in an ideal world. The UK should be and probably are plenty capable, NZ too.

#21 dogwatch

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 01:51 AM

In the UK that Blair clown got his blind minister to sign an agrement that the US can issue an arrest warrant for a UK resident and just ship them back without any due process


Not entirely correct. There is judicial review including consideration of provisions of the Human Rights Convention - see http://www.homeoffic...extrad-part-2/. What is however the case is that the Extradition Act 2003 requires the USA to demonstrate only reasonable suspicion, not to provide prima facie evidence as would be required, for example, of such paragons of judicial excellence as Zimbabwe. Much the same applies for the UK to extradite out of the USA for which the standard required is "probable cause".

http://www.dailymail...ars-chains.html is I am afraid pretty much bollocks. The Extradition Act 2003 is not specifically about extradition to and from the USA and exactly the same standards and processes apply to extradition to, for example, Australia and New Zealand.

#22 K38BOB

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 02:38 AM


Having mixed feelings on this raid though, the US have started their big attack on the free Internet with laws like SOPA etc and the shutdown of megaupload is just one big political show.

Mixed feelings? Yes, me too.

But, in this case there is a worrying conjunction of male ego, big display, big (maybe illicit) money + guns, swagger + whatever else police have found during their searches.

It is the combination Tempero finds attractive.

And I doubt this is just an Internet-related matter. It shows all the signs of spilling into other areas.

There was a time when the most serious crime in NZ involved blokes nicking a lamb for dinner.

But, with globalization and the 1980s embrace of radical right (i.e. Milton Friedman) socio-politics and economics, NZ has became a refuge for dodgy characters. And a site for the manufacture and use of drugs.

Years ago I went to Mt. Eden prison (in Auckland) and did a study on alias use amongst inmates. As hypothesized, those using one or more aliases had longer (and more serious) criminal records than those without (which means we on SA should congratulate Peter Huston!). Alias use is a durable predictor of criminality.

This German NZ'er known as "Kim Dotcom" is an interesting character. But why would anyone own luxury cars with vanity plates saying MAFIA, HACKER, CEO ?

Unlike the United States NZ does not permit people to carry arms. So, if Butterworth's mate Tempero is found guilty of touting a pistol, there is a problem.

While discussing this let us remember it is all "alleged." Thus far, there have been no guilty pleas.

Even so, I can assure you a lot of NZ'ers are concerned about the frayed social fabric in their homeland.


ahhh Milt

link another reason why I'm surprised you had anything good to say about Stanford,



#23 Te Kooti

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:01 AM

Oh, and tell those pricks from the FBI who are down here to piss off home as well!


When LBJ visited Wellington, during a demonstration outside the US embassy, one of his security detail stuck a handgun in my back.

So I am not a big fan of US law enforcement officials operating in New Zealand.

However, with globalization, the rules of engagement have changed.

I am witholding judgment on this until we hear the evidence in court.

But, with regard to the guns, my impression is Tempero was packing a pistol. Not a shotgun issue.

But again, we will see what comes out in court.

#24 Te Kooti

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:05 AM

ahhh Milt

link another reason why I'm surprised you had anything good to say about Stanford,


Friedman was from the University of Chicago, n'est pas?

#25 Danno

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:23 AM

Cant comment on Tempero - actually haven't noted anything about him.
I'm more worried about the NZ Police force and how they behave with guns

Judging by how they shot a guy holding a leaking LPG cylinder yesterday......Not saying they shouldn't have shot him but given they could have blown half the neighborhood up at the same time

http://www.nzherald....jectid=10780581

#26 Te Kooti

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:38 AM

Cant comment on Tempero - actually haven't noted anything about him.
I'm more worried about the NZ Police force and how they behave with guns

Judging by how they shot a guy holding a leaking LPG cylinder yesterday......Not saying they shouldn't have shot him but given they could have blown half the neighborhood up at the same time

http://www.nzherald....jectid=10780581


Yes, I hear you. There are problems with police use of guns (and tasers) in many countries.

The Auckland judge has just denied Dotcom bail. Reserved his decision.

Crown claims the shotguns had been modified and were unlawful in NZ.

Tempero had a legitimate business going. But should have chosen his company more carefully.

He will be dealt with separately.

#27 K38BOB

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 04:20 AM


ahhh Milt

link another reason why I'm surprised you had anything good to say about Stanford,


Friedman was from the University of Chicago, n'est pas?


link
Hoover Institution Stanford University

. . . ideas defining a free society




Milton Friedman
Expertise: Monetary and price theory, monetary history


Milton Friedman, recipient of the 1976 Nobel Memorial Prize for economic science, was a senior research fellow at the Hoover Institution from 1977 to 2006. He passed away on Nov. 16, 2006. (Link to obituary.) He was also the Paul Snowden Russell Distinguished Service Professor Emeritus of Economics at the University of Chicago, where he taught from 1946 to 1976, and a member of the research staff of the National Bureau of Economic Research from 1937 to 1981.

Friedman was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1988 and received the National Medal of Science the same year.

He was widely regarded as the leader of the Chicago School of monetary economics, which stresses the importance of the quantity of money as an instrument of government policy and as a determinant of business cycles and inflation.

In addition to his scientific work, Friedman also wrote extensively on public policy, always with a primary emphasis on the preservation and extension of individual freedom. His most important books in this field are (with Rose D. Friedman) Capitalism and Freedom (University of Chicago Press, 1962); Bright Promises, Dismal Performance (Thomas Horton and Daughters, 1983), which consists mostly of reprints of columns he wrote for Newsweek from 1966 to 1983; (with Rose D. Friedman) Free to Choose (Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1980), which complements a ten-part television series of the same name shown over the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) network in early 1980; and (with Rose D. Friedman) Tyranny of the Status Quo (Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1984), which complements a three-part television series of the same name, shown over PBS in early 1984.

He was a member of the President's Commission on an All-Volunteer Armed Force and the President's Commission on White House Fellows. He was a member of President Ronald Reagan's Economic Policy Advisory Board (a group of experts from outside the government named in 1981 by President Reagan).

Friedman was also active in public affairs, serving as an informal economic adviser to Senator Barry Goldwater in his unsuccessful campaign for the presidency in 1964, to Richard Nixon in his successful 1968 campaign, to President Nixon subsequently, and to Ronald Reagan in his 1980 campaign.

He has published many books and articles, most notably A Theory of the Consumption Function, The Optimum Quantity of Money and Other Essays, and (with A. J. Schwartz) A Monetary History of the United States, Monetary Statistics of the United States, and Monetary Trends in the United States and the United Kingdom.

He was a past president of the American Economic Association, the Western Economic Association, and the Mont Pelerin Society and was a member of the American Philosophical Society and the National Academy of Sciences.

He was awarded honorary degrees by universities in the United States, Japan, Israel, and Guatemala, as well as the Grand Cordon of the First Class Order of the Sacred Treasure by the Japanese government in 1986.

Friedman received a B.A. in 1932 from Rutgers University, an M.A. in 1933 from the University of Chicago, and a Ph.D. in 1946 from Columbia University.

Two Lucky People, his and Rose D. Friedman's memoirs, was published in 1998 by the University of Chicago Press.

#28 SW Sailor

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 04:27 AM


ahhh Milt

link another reason why I'm surprised you had anything good to say about Stanford,


Friedman was from the University of Chicago, n'est pas?


I believe you are correct, but I do find it funny that you had a gun to your back when LBJ was in town. No sense in taking any unnecessary risks.

#29 Indio

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:58 AM

I hope they fight the extradition request and force the yanks to present their evidence. Unless their case is rock solid, the extradition request will be denied.

#30 Te Kooti

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 07:27 AM



ahhh Milt

link another reason why I'm surprised you had anything good to say about Stanford,


Friedman was from the University of Chicago, n'est pas?


link
Hoover Institution Stanford University

. . . ideas defining a free society



Thanks for this. So was at Chicago but spent the latter years at Stanford.

Half the ANC leadership were trained at Stanford and many left-oriented leaders from Latin America.

When I was there recently I kept an eye open for Condoleeza Rice. But, like at most universities, hot shots are never in their offices.

Steve Jobs met his wife there. It is a good story. Like Ellison he is a university dropout and would never put up with university BS.

Even so, he gave talks at Stanford and would drop in on classes that interested him.

Someone had posted notices saying a well-known IT leader was giving a talk at the Stanford Busines School. So his wife-to-be (then a student) plonked herself in the front row thinking Gates would appear.

Jobs was a bit early so he too sat in the front row - next to the leggy blonde.

When she realised who he was she said "I am glad to meet you because I won a prize in a raffle. The prize is dinner with you."

I will not tell you what happened next. It is in the Isaacson bio - which I have just finished.

But I thought it a good pick-up line.

I saw Meagan Kelly's film "Grace" (www.meagankelly.net) at Stanford. About kids living in a Phillipines rubbish (garbage) dump. Milton Friedman would have hated it. But I was impressed!

#31 dogwatch

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 08:05 AM

In addition to his scientific work, Friedman......


If economics is a science, how come all those economic scientists didn't predict the recession? How come LTCM with its regiment of PhDs went bust? The Economist magazine has wisely concluded that Economics is not a science.

#32 2XD

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 09:31 AM

I hope they fight the extradition request and force the yanks to present their evidence. Unless their case is rock solid, the extradition request will be denied.

like

#33 dogwatch

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 09:49 AM

You may like but it doesn't appear to be NZ law. www.mfat.govt.nz/downloads/treaties-and-international-law/Extradition-Act-summary.pdf

Part 3 of the Extradition Act also provides a
mechanism by which the requirements to
provide evidence establishing a prima facie
case in support of the extradition request
can be replaced by the simpler “record of
the case” procedure.
This allows the request to attach just one
consolidated evidential deposition, setting
out the facts of the case and outlining the
evidence that is available to support those
facts. Separate depositions providing that
evidence are not required.
This process currently applies to the Czech
Rep., the Rep. of Korea, the US and Tonga

#34 davidprobable

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:12 PM

Wayne Tempero, bodyguard to Ernesto Bertarelli and Brad Butterworth, has been arrested in dawn raids at Coatesville - just north of Auckland (and not far from Core Builders in Warkworth).

You will remember Mr. Tempero's lurking presence during the LV-P series in Auckland.

His "fightimes" website describes his close friendship with Bertarelli and Butterworth.

NZ Police raids were conducted in conjunction with the FBI.

The plan is to close down an Internet file-sharing site called "Megaupload.com."

Until recently, Tempero was a director of this company.

This (edited for brevity) from the New Zealand Herald.


Posted Image

Kim Dotcom. Photo / Greg Bowker


A dawn raid that landed internet mogul Kim Dotcom in jail was timed for his birthday celebration so his party guests could also be locked up.






Officers also arrested personal protection specialist Wayne Tempero, 55, and charged him with possession of a restricted weapon. He is due in court on Thursday.





Wait a minute here..............isn't that the fat guy that was beating up on Tempesta a while back or maybe still???? What was his name? Had a big boat or boats and made money off students putting them in government/lender secured loans that they couldn't ever pay off and can't dodge with bankruptcy?? So he has a bodyguard named Tempero? Is that a contraction of Tempesta? Are they related? Is Tempero a fifth columnest for Tempesta after all? Who gets the film rights? Alan Block? There is far more here than meets the eye. TK you must dig deeper. SA has become so boring that I rely on you to dig up the really great stories. Wonder which boats they seized. BTW the mansion was leased. Who owns it TK......Tempesta?

#35 Te Kooti

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:43 PM

Here is Brad (back) with Tempero (in front)

Dotcom was leasing the house but did a $4 mill. renovation.

He is upset with police landing helicopters in his back yard!

Attached Files



#36 maxmini

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:49 PM

I hope they fight the extradition request and force the yanks to present their evidence. Unless their case is rock solid, the extradition request will be denied.


There must be something to it as Filesonic , another major file sharing web site , all but closed tis doors yesterday as well.

#37 dogwatch

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:50 PM

Compared to the private armies that accompany Russian $Bs to European glamour-spots, he looks positively genial.

#38 Te Kooti

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 05:28 AM

From: National Business Review, 20 January, 2012



Kim Dotcom

The German-born multi-millionaire’s bid to buy the Chrisco mansion in Coatesville, north of Auckland, was knocked back by the Overseas Investment Office (OIO) last year, as reported by NBR.

Mr Dotcom’s application to buy the homestead he rents at 186 Mahoenui Valley Rd in Coatesville, north of Auckland - one of the priciest homes in the country - was declined on the basis of new section 16 additions to the Overseas Investment Act. This includes criteria for relevant business experience, financial commitment and good character.

Mr Dotcom and his family were granted residency last year. Information provided to the OIO indicated the Dotcom’s do not intend to reside here indefinitely.
They have been renting the Coatesville mansion built by Chrisco founders Richard and Ruth Bradley.

Mr Dotcom is the sole shareholder of Megastuff, which has two directors Andrew Bowden and Peter Brooke

A third director, Wayne Tempero (a bodyguard who formerly worked for Brad Butterworth and Russell Coutts) resigned in August.



#39 Te Kooti

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 05:53 AM

NZ Herald, 24 January, 2012



Kim Dotcom said he has "convictions that he doesn't want to reveal, though he told Immigration NZ as part of his residency application.

He said he had revealed the details even though they had been "erased" from his record under Germany's clean slate legislation.

Officials said his background was weighed against his potential benefit to New Zealand and they exercised their discretion in his favour.

"I have paid the price for my mistakes, learned my lessons and that's all that I have to say about this," said Dotcom.

"I have earned the right to live in today and the future, not in the past.

"Today I am a successful businessman.

"I am not disclosing how wealthy I am and it doesn't matter.

"Let's just say I have my place in the top 10 of New Zealand."

He said he had a passion for "cars, jets, yachts and toys" and "the good life in general".

"I try to make the best of my time and enjoy my life with my family and friends. But I am also always interested in improving the lives of people who are less fortunate.

"It is a great passion of both my wife and I to be involved in charities and to help others."

Dotcom said he wanted to buy some of the "most exclusive properties" in New Zealand and create a network of high-end rentals for "VIP travellers".

He also wanted to create a 20km motorsport racetrack attached to a five-star resort.

"Whatever I am doing in New Zealand is certainly going to create a good number of jobs and benefit New Zealand.

"I might be one of the most flamboyant characters New Zealand has ever seen but my intentions are good and I would like to see New Zealand flourish to its fullest potential."



#40 SW Sailor

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 06:03 AM

Sounds like a perfect candidate for adoption.

Maybe you should solicit him to contribute to the Somali's instead of me.

#41 Te Kooti

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:15 AM

The judge has denied Dotcom`s application for bail.

Considers him a flight risk.

I wonder if Tempero pulled the plug on Dotcom when he saw the writing on the wall.



#42 Albatros

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 08:50 PM

[i][b]NZ Herald, 24 January, 2012



Kim Dotcom said he has "convictions that he doesn't want to reveal, though he told Immigration NZ as part of his residency application.


"I try to make the best of my time and enjoy my life with my family and friends. But I am also always interested in improving the lives of people who are less fortunate.


During a recent gumball race -for those who don't know this nonsense, a number of ueber rich and/or ueber moronic idiots race through a continent in Lambo's, Ferrari's and the likes, just on normal roads, only aim is to have fun and be first - a German gumball racer hit a lady, she was severely wounded, a next racer stopped, a guy stepped out, took his camcorder and with a big dirty smile he filmed the lady,didn't bother to help and after filming drove off again in a hurry, guess who that was, that's his conviction, that's how he enjoys his time and that's how he's intent on improving the life of other people.

The deep black irony of this thread is that I just can't see how such a horrible character can fit into the NZ mentality, unless of course Hastings' bad taste and foul intentions when posting this crap here are the real NZ spirit, in that case the fat fuck Kim would fit in nicely.

#43 ro!

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 09:10 PM


[i][b]NZ Herald, 24 January, 2012



Kim Dotcom said he has "convictions that he doesn't want to reveal, though he told Immigration NZ as part of his residency application.


"I try to make the best of my time and enjoy my life with my family and friends. But I am also always interested in improving the lives of people who are less fortunate.


During a recent gumball race -for those who don't know this nonsense, a number of ueber rich and/or ueber moronic idiots race through a continent in Lambo's, Ferrari's and the likes, just on normal roads, only aim is to have fun and be first - a German gumball racer hit a lady, she was severely wounded, a next racer stopped, a guy stepped out, took his camcorder and with a big dirty smile he filmed the lady,didn't bother to help and after filming drove off again in a hurry, guess who that was, that's his conviction, that's how he enjoys his time and that's how he's intent on improving the life of other people.

The deep black irony of this thread is that I just can't see how such a horrible character can fit into the NZ mentality, unless of course Hastings' bad taste and foul intentions when posting this crap here are the real NZ spirit, in that case the fat fuck Kim would fit in nicely.


hastings is the exception to every kiwi I have met, worked with or sailed with...

It's ironic to note that the Tempero dude would never have been down in NZed if the 5 kiwi traitors hadn't have hired him after being threatened with physical violence by the Blackheart arseholes that hastings admired so much.... before he got called on it...

The shame of it is that the security dude didn't slap him when he got lippy with "friar tuck" in the viaduct...just told him to fuck off...

#44 maxmini

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 09:21 PM

He has been denied bail as a flight risk so far . On another note his Megauplad site is said to be responsible for 4% of ALL web traffic . DAMNNNNN thats a lot of porn .

#45 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 01:20 AM

The shame of it is that the security dude didn't slap him when he got lippy with "friar tuck" in the viaduct...just told him to fuck off...


Assaulting people is a crime in New Zealand.

The law against assault applies to self-appointed "personal protection experts" and ordinary citizens.

And, by the way, Tempero had a reason for being in NZ.

He lives there!

In addition, it is a crime to carry handguns in NZ.

#46 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 01:32 AM

The deep black irony of this thread is that I just can't see how such a horrible character can fit into the NZ mentality


Older NZ'ers remember a time when they did not lock house doors and rarely ran into peopple like Dotcom or Tempero.

But, starting around 1984, things changed in a radical way. Thank you MIlton Friedman!

Older forms of mushy collectivism were ditched in favour of a radical mean-spirited "fuck you" individualism.

The money-chase overwhelmed social considerations and immigration requirements were changed to favour those who had lots of cash.

Where the money came from was not a preoccupation of the immigration officer.

But we have to be careful and not engage in xenophobia.

Dotocom is clearly a full-fledged arsehole. But so too are certain born-and-bred New Zealanders [some of them involved in earlier iterations of the America's Cup].

The Minister of Immigration had better have a good story about how Dotcom acquired NZ residency.

Albatros, there are certain people who, for their own reasons, will welcome Dotcom to NZ.

But the average kiwi is not impressed (and the backlash has begun).

#47 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:11 AM

Butterworth's Mate Charged With Touting a Semi-Automatic Shotgun

From the NZ Herald:


Wayne Phillip Tempero, 55, appeared in North Shore District Court this morning charged with unlawful possession of a pistol, namely a semi-automatic shotgun.


Speaking outside court before his appearance, Tempero, who is in charge of security at Dotcom's luxury rented mansion near Auckland, said he would fight the charges.

He said the shotguns had been bought in Auckland with a licence.



#48 SW Sailor

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:19 AM

Butterworth's Mate Charged With Touting a Semi-Automatic Shotgun

From the NZ Herald:


Wayne Phillip Tempero, 55, appeared in North Shore District Court this morning charged with unlawful possession of a pistol, namely a semi-automatic shotgun.


Speaking outside court before his appearance, Tempero, who is in charge of security at Dotcom's luxury rented mansion near Auckland, said he would fight the charges.

He said the shotguns had been bought in Auckland with a licence.


Since when is a pistol the same as a semi-automatic shot gun ??

#49 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:25 AM


Butterworth's Mate Charged With Touting a Semi-Automatic Shotgun

From the NZ Herald:


Wayne Phillip Tempero, 55, appeared in North Shore District Court this morning charged with unlawful possession of a pistol, namely a semi-automatic shotgun.


Speaking outside court before his appearance, Tempero, who is in charge of security at Dotcom's luxury rented mansion near Auckland, said he would fight the charges.

He said the shotguns had been bought in Auckland with a licence.


Since when is a pistol the same as a semi-automatic shot gun ??



Don't ask me!

Ask the judge!!

#50 ~Stingray~

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:30 AM

Are you feeling lucky?

#51 SW Sailor

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:32 AM



Butterworth's Mate Charged With Touting a Semi-Automatic Shotgun

From the NZ Herald:


Wayne Phillip Tempero, 55, appeared in North Shore District Court this morning charged with unlawful possession of a pistol, namely a semi-automatic shotgun.


Speaking outside court before his appearance, Tempero, who is in charge of security at Dotcom's luxury rented mansion near Auckland, said he would fight the charges.

He said the shotguns had been bought in Auckland with a licence.


Since when is a pistol the same as a semi-automatic shot gun ??



Don't ask me!

Ask the judge!!


you're the professed local, you tell me.

#52 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:47 AM

you're the professed local, you tell me.


I was not at the courthouse.

I assume he had a sawn-off shotgun.

Small enough to drop into a holster on his belt.

When the case comes to trial we will find out.

Big mistake for this man to get mixed-up with Dotcom.

Not good for the professional reputation.

Daubney lives close to the North Shore courthouse.

Maybe you could ask him?

#53 K38BOB

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:52 AM

Here you go link

#54 SW Sailor

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:53 AM


you're the professed local, you tell me.


I was not at the courthouse.

I assume he had a sawn-off shotgun.

Small enough to drop into a holster on his belt.

When the case comes to trial we will find out.

Big mistake for this man to get mixed-up with Dotcom.

Not good for the professional reputation.

Daubney lives close to the North Shore courthouse.

Maybe you could ask him?

Whoa, your asking me to clarify this ?

I live in the US, what are you smoking ?

You are the expert on everything NZ, not me.



#55 Te Kooti

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 05:59 AM



I live in the US, what are you smoking ?


Yes, I know you live in the Excited States.

And, as such, would be an expert on guns.


#56 SW Sailor

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Posted 26 January 2012 - 06:06 AM




I live in the US, what are you smoking ?


Yes, I know you live in the Excited States.

And, as such, would be an expert on guns.


It doesn't take an expert to know the difference between a pistol and a sawed off shotgun.

Ever watch a movie ?

#57 Te Kooti

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Posted 27 January 2012 - 12:01 AM

Tempero says his shotgun is legitimate

From the
NZ Herald: [edited for brevity]

Wayne Phillip Tempero, who had been head of security for Kim Dotcom at his Coatesville mansion, appeared in North Shore District Court yesterday over the unlawful possession of a semi-automatic shotgun.

Speaking outside court before his appearance, Tempero said he would fight the charges. He said the shotgun had been bought in Auckland with a licence.

Tempero, 55, has also looked after sailors Brad Butterworth and Russell Coutts, as well as Alinghi's founder, billionaire Ernesto Bertarelli during the America's Cup, and released a self-defence DVD called Stamp in 2007.

Tempero is due back in court next month.

FBI is seeking to extradite Dotcom and the trio to the US to face charges of conspiring to commit racketeering, conspiring to commit money laundering, copyright infringement, and aiding and abetting copyright infringement over the internet through the website Megaupload.

Dotcom denies the charges and had his bail application declined by Judge McNaughton yesterday.

Meanwhile, associates of Kim Dotcom say his flamboyant lifestyle of fast cars, superyachts and mansions is a carefully cultivated image which helped him earn his fortune and masked a sharp business mind.

The film Kimble Does Monaco shows his entourage on board the Golden Odyssey luxury cruiser with bikini-clad women, including Playboy model Gitta Saxx.

In one scene a group of semi-naked women is sprayed with champagne by the yacht's pool while "Captain Kim" looks on, decked out in black suit and polo neck and black and white shoes.

The flamboyance and cult of personality masked not only his intelligence, but also his background and true personality, the associate told the Guardian.

Attached Files



#58 Te Kooti

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Posted 27 January 2012 - 02:55 PM

It doesn't take an expert to know the difference between a pistol and a sawed off shotgun.


Check the link supplied by K38.

Apparently there is a shotgun/pistol hybrid.


#59 Te Kooti

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Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:00 PM

Apparently Dotcom's websites handled about 4% of Internet traffic.

Jeez, even more than Sailing Anarchy.

Dotcom is still in jail.

But weekend papers are questioning the prosecution.

And he has hired competent kiwi lawyers.



#60 SW Sailor

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Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:14 PM


It doesn't take an expert to know the difference between a pistol and a sawed off shotgun.


Check the link supplied by K38.

Apparently there is a shotgun/pistol hybrid.


What, a 12 gauge pistol or a 9mm shotgun ?

#61 Te Kooti

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Posted 29 January 2012 - 09:21 PM

What, a 12 gauge pistol or a 9mm shotgun ?


Email Brad and ask him.

He and Tempero could be discussing it.

#62 SW Sailor

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Posted 29 January 2012 - 10:06 PM


What, a 12 gauge pistol or a 9mm shotgun ?


Email Brad and ask him.

He and Tempero could be discussing it.

Sorry, I don't take requests.

Anyway, as one of your countrymen you know him better than I do, why don't you ask ?



#63 Te Kooti

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Posted 30 January 2012 - 05:18 PM

Tempero is still up at the Coatesville house.

Guarding Dotcom's wife and kids.

While the boss makes phone calls from the jail.

One thing I like (liked) about Steve Jobs was the fact he lived in an ordinary Palo Alto house - without high fences, long driveways and guards.



#64 krispy kreme

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 06:54 PM


What it's like to have sex with someone with Asperger's (on a Droid phone)

Posted to: Self-management
November 18th, 201 You think it would be really fun to have sex with me. Because, I think you can tell from my posts, I’ll do anything. But maybe you can also tell from my posts that it’s a little bit weird. Because you know that I’ll say anything, too, but sometimes, I make you cringe.

I think I’m that way in bed, too.

This post is about work. And sex, which are two of the essential areas of life one needs to be able to function in before you can feel like a normal adult. And both sex and work are governed by a set of rules that many people are able to learn just by being in the world.

Asperger Syndrome compromises one’s ability to read nonverbal social cues. A simple example of this deficit is answering the question, “How are you?” It is loaded with so many nonverbal issues that I simply freeze. Even if you tell me, “Just say fine,” sometimes the situation looks special to me, and I can’t figure out why it’s special, so I can’t talk.

So I've spent my life teaching myself the rules for what to do in each social situation. I study people, make notes for myself, and then test the notes to see what other situations my notes apply to. To get a sense of how awkward this looks, here’s a video that is supposed to be a parody of people with Asperger’s interacting with each other. But my family has such a high proportion of people with Asperger’s that this video, honestly, is not far from what our life is like.

In my experience, the places with the most rules are work and sex. So, you can teach yourself the process of becoming better at work by applying the process of learning the rules about dating and sex. And vice versa. I, for example, am great at work rules and terrible at sex rules. So I teach myself using the reverse mechanism.

1. You can tell you need help if you are not having fun.
When I think about my sexual history, I think it is me basically not understanding that there are rules.

In college, where most people are experimenting with the rules of sex, I was missing them. Maybe because I was raised by my grandma, I honestly believed that if you had sex, it meant you were getting married. So I lost my virginity to a guy who said he’d marry me.

And on that day, I had no idea how sex worked. I don’t know why I had not bothered to find out.

He was propped up on his arms when he couldn’t find my vagina with his penis, so he said, “Put me inside.”

I said, “What?”

“Inside you. Use your hand.”

“I don’t know where the hole is.”

“What? Are you kidding me?”

“There are a lot of holes down there. I don’t know which one is for sex.”

“You are so stupid.”

He eventually put his penis in. He said, “Am I in?”

I said, “I don’t know.”

Then he came. And I returned to doing homework.

2. If you can start by pretending it feels right, eventually it will feel right.
After college I posed nude to make money. A guy who paid a lot of money for a shoot looked at me for one second and said that I’m too uptight to be good. Another guy did soft-focus for Penthouse. I signed a release. He told me to undress, showed me a dressing room, and gave me a robe. I said, “I don’t need this,” and I undressed right in front of him.

“What should I do?”

“Lay down, and enjoy yourself.”

“Enjoy myself? Do you have a book I could read?”

“No, I’m going to take pictures now. I mean you should masturbate.”

I didn’t know what to do. I only need one finger to move one inch back and forth to masturbate. He wouldn’t see it. I told him I thought all the other women were faking it for him because masturbation is not visual.

“Okay. Can you fake it for me?” he said.

I tried, and then we both agreed that I couldn’t. So I left.

3. Surround yourself with people who can effectively guide you through rules.
I tried having lesbian sex. I answered an ad. Picture her: The professional ballet dancer who had just quit, and to celebrate, she got breast implants. And me, the aspiring professional beach volleyball player.

She spent the whole evening talking about how smart I am and how many books I’ve read and how strong I am.

I spent the whole evening talking about how hot she is.

I did not realize that this exchange meant that I had to be the aggressor in bed.

I said, “Are we going to kiss now? We can’t do this whole date and not kiss.”

She said, “I need you to seduce me.”

I said, “What? Are you kidding? Just take your clothes off. How are we going to have sex if we keep putting it off?”

She said, “It’s not like that. There has to be a game or something.”

I said, “Okay. You do the game. What should we do?”

She pouted. I did not realize it was part of the game.

I told her that we were really ineffective together and I thought we needed some guy there with us to run the show. We never did that. We never did anything.

4. If you don’t learn the rules for navigating, life gets boring and repetitive.
I am fast-forwarding through things that are largely repetitive of the above situations. For example, there was the guy who asked me out while I was an arbitrage clerk at the Chicago Mercantile Exchange. He was on the phones, picking up orders, and I’d stand in the British Pound pit, flashing hand signals to him to tell him what was bid and offer. He’d flash back a hand signal like, buy ten at twenty. Then he started using other sorts of hand signals (open-outcry hand-signals are way more than just market indicators, believe me.) He flashed the sign for do you want to have lunch (spooning food into mouth for “eat” coupled with pretending to break something between your hands, for “break”). I went.

We dated. To get rid of him, I told him I was a lesbian and I only wanted to date him if there could be another woman there, too. That didn’t just make him pursue me with more fervor. It made the whole trading floor pursue me. And I had no idea why.

Notice how there’s one theme here: I have no idea how other people think about sex.

5. Do not get obsessively sidetracked by things that do not require social interaction.
So then I get married. The first time. We both have Asperger’s. We both like reading about sex, but having it is more traumatic. He would not go down on me, so I started writing obsessively about his not going down on me. Like the time he told me he couldn’t do it because he had a toothache.

We had sex, but he didn’t like that it was messy, and I liked writing about it better than doing it.

We had sex two times in six years after we had a kid. And I got pregnant both times because I have studied my ovulation since I was 24, and I’m an ace at sticking my finger up my vagina and 1) gauging how open my cervix is and 2) pulling out some mucus on my finger and checking to see how elastic it is.

Even now I can’t help getting excited about ovulation. Go to the bathroom right now and check your cervical mucus. It’s fascinating. If it’s elastic you are ovulating. I can peg my ovulation to the hour if I check every half-hour, which I can do because I can stick my hand in my vagina anywhere—even in a job interview, if the person leaves the room to get some water. So that’s why I was able to have a kid (and a miscarriage) only having sex two times.

6. Rules never stop coming at you, they just get infinitely more nuanced.
And now, here I am with the farmer.

At this point, sex should be low pressure for me. I am one of the one percent of women who can have an orgasm just by thinking about having an orgasm. I’m not sure why this is. Maybe because my mom taught me to do Kegel exercises before I even got my first period. I can orgasm ten times before the guy has one.

But the nonverbal cues you do to get to the sex really stress me out. It seems like a dance. When you date, there’s the official dance date you do, which I can handle. I’ve been dating enough to know you do dinner, talk, go to someone’s house, move close, kiss, lay down, get close to sex, go to bed. That’s the dance. I know where we are and what’s coming next.

But if you’re married, there’s no dance. You are just there, in bed. So the dance becomes a micro dance. There are little cues you give the other person, a careful touch in a spot you don’t usually touch, a kiss that is a kiss that means this-is-not-a-goodnight-kiss, a pointed question like, did the kids fall asleep? These are tiny cues that have to come with other, tiny cues.

I tell the farmer, "I can’t take it. The subtle stuff. It's too much. Just tell me you want to have sex."

So a day went by, and he did that. He said, "I want to have sex."

I said, "Okay."

Then I said, "Hold it. This isn't fun. There needs to be something else."

So we went back to the dance. And I tried to pay close attention to nonverbal cues and then respond with the appropriate nonverbal cue.

Sometimes I can do that. Like if I take a Xanax. But a lot of times, he gives one nonverbal cue, like breathing warm and wet next to my ear. And I curl up in a ball.

I curl up in a ball and tell him I’m too anxious to have sex. Even after we have had sex hundreds of times. I still do it. At first he couldn’t believe it. But then he saw that I don’t know left and right, really, and my math skills end, largely, at third grade, and I am an idiot savant when it comes to memorizing statistics about Gen Y tendencies at work. So now he’s learned to believe anything. And he has learned that the only way to get me uncurled is to talk to me.

He does facts. He says what he’s doing with his hands, what he is feeling, what we will do, what I have done, he tries to stick to facts. And he narrates his movements as he goes. And he does not expect me to move or speak, until I’ve heard enough verbal cues to get back in the game.

Sometimes, when the farmer was dumping me, and people were saying, how can you stick with him? I would say, “He’s so good in bed.” And now you know what I mean.



#65 Albatros

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 07:46 PM


What it's like to have sex with someone with Asperger's (on a Droid phone)

Posted to: Self-management
November 18th, 201 You think it would be really fun to have sex with me. Because, I think you can tell from my posts, I’ll do anything. But maybe you can also tell from my posts that it’s a little bit weird. Because you know that I’ll say anything, too, but sometimes, I make you cringe.

I think I’m that way in bed, too.

This post is about work. And sex, which are two of the essential areas of life one needs to be able to function in before you can feel like a normal adult. And both sex and work are governed by a set of rules that many people are able to learn just by being in the world.

Asperger Syndrome compromises one’s ability to read nonverbal social cues. A simple example of this deficit is answering the question, “How are you?” It is loaded with so many nonverbal issues that I simply freeze. Even if you tell me, “Just say fine,” sometimes the situation looks special to me, and I can’t figure out why it’s special, so I can’t talk.

So I've spent my life teaching myself the rules for what to do in each social situation. I study people, make notes for myself, and then test the notes to see what other situations my notes apply to. To get a sense of how awkward this looks, here’s a video that is supposed to be a parody of people with Asperger’s interacting with each other. But my family has such a high proportion of people with Asperger’s that this video, honestly, is not far from what our life is like.

In my experience, the places with the most rules are work and sex. So, you can teach yourself the process of becoming better at work by applying the process of learning the rules about dating and sex. And vice versa. I, for example, am great at work rules and terrible at sex rules. So I teach myself using the reverse mechanism.

1. You can tell you need help if you are not having fun.
When I think about my sexual history, I think it is me basically not understanding that there are rules.

In college, where most people are experimenting with the rules of sex, I was missing them. Maybe because I was raised by my grandma, I honestly believed that if you had sex, it meant you were getting married. So I lost my virginity to a guy who said he’d marry me.

And on that day, I had no idea how sex worked. I don’t know why I had not bothered to find out.

He was propped up on his arms when he couldn’t find my vagina with his penis, so he said, “Put me inside.”

I said, “What?”

“Inside you. Use your hand.”

“I don’t know where the hole is.”

“What? Are you kidding me?”

“There are a lot of holes down there. I don’t know which one is for sex.”

“You are so stupid.”

He eventually put his penis in. He said, “Am I in?”

I said, “I don’t know.”

Then he came. And I returned to doing homework.

2. If you can start by pretending it feels right, eventually it will feel right.
After college I posed nude to make money. A guy who paid a lot of money for a shoot looked at me for one second and said that I’m too uptight to be good. Another guy did soft-focus for Penthouse. I signed a release. He told me to undress, showed me a dressing room, and gave me a robe. I said, “I don’t need this,” and I undressed right in front of him.

“What should I do?”

“Lay down, and enjoy yourself.”

“Enjoy myself? Do you have a book I could read?”

“No, I’m going to take pictures now. I mean you should masturbate.”

I didn’t know what to do. I only need one finger to move one inch back and forth to masturbate. He wouldn’t see it. I told him I thought all the other women were faking it for him because masturbation is not visual.

“Okay. Can you fake it for me?” he said.

I tried, and then we both agreed that I couldn’t. So I left.

3. Surround yourself with people who can effectively guide you through rules.
I tried having lesbian sex. I answered an ad. Picture her: The professional ballet dancer who had just quit, and to celebrate, she got breast implants. And me, the aspiring professional beach volleyball player.

She spent the whole evening talking about how smart I am and how many books I’ve read and how strong I am.

I spent the whole evening talking about how hot she is.

I did not realize that this exchange meant that I had to be the aggressor in bed.

I said, “Are we going to kiss now? We can’t do this whole date and not kiss.”

She said, “I need you to seduce me.”

I said, “What? Are you kidding? Just take your clothes off. How are we going to have sex if we keep putting it off?”

She said, “It’s not like that. There has to be a game or something.”

I said, “Okay. You do the game. What should we do?”

She pouted. I did not realize it was part of the game.

I told her that we were really ineffective together and I thought we needed some guy there with us to run the show. We never did that. We never did anything.

4. If you don’t learn the rules for navigating, life gets boring and repetitive.
I am fast-forwarding through things that are largely repetitive of the above situations. For example, there was the guy who asked me out while I was an arbitrage clerk at the Chicago Mercantile Exchange. He was on the phones, picking up orders, and I’d stand in the British Pound pit, flashing hand signals to him to tell him what was bid and offer. He’d flash back a hand signal like, buy ten at twenty. Then he started using other sorts of hand signals (open-outcry hand-signals are way more than just market indicators, believe me.) He flashed the sign for do you want to have lunch (spooning food into mouth for “eat” coupled with pretending to break something between your hands, for “break”). I went.

We dated. To get rid of him, I told him I was a lesbian and I only wanted to date him if there could be another woman there, too. That didn’t just make him pursue me with more fervor. It made the whole trading floor pursue me. And I had no idea why.

Notice how there’s one theme here: I have no idea how other people think about sex.

5. Do not get obsessively sidetracked by things that do not require social interaction.
So then I get married. The first time. We both have Asperger’s. We both like reading about sex, but having it is more traumatic. He would not go down on me, so I started writing obsessively about his not going down on me. Like the time he told me he couldn’t do it because he had a toothache.

We had sex, but he didn’t like that it was messy, and I liked writing about it better than doing it.

We had sex two times in six years after we had a kid. And I got pregnant both times because I have studied my ovulation since I was 24, and I’m an ace at sticking my finger up my vagina and 1) gauging how open my cervix is and 2) pulling out some mucus on my finger and checking to see how elastic it is.

Even now I can’t help getting excited about ovulation. Go to the bathroom right now and check your cervical mucus. It’s fascinating. If it’s elastic you are ovulating. I can peg my ovulation to the hour if I check every half-hour, which I can do because I can stick my hand in my vagina anywhere—even in a job interview, if the person leaves the room to get some water. So that’s why I was able to have a kid (and a miscarriage) only having sex two times.

6. Rules never stop coming at you, they just get infinitely more nuanced.
And now, here I am with the farmer.

At this point, sex should be low pressure for me. I am one of the one percent of women who can have an orgasm just by thinking about having an orgasm. I’m not sure why this is. Maybe because my mom taught me to do Kegel exercises before I even got my first period. I can orgasm ten times before the guy has one.

But the nonverbal cues you do to get to the sex really stress me out. It seems like a dance. When you date, there’s the official dance date you do, which I can handle. I’ve been dating enough to know you do dinner, talk, go to someone’s house, move close, kiss, lay down, get close to sex, go to bed. That’s the dance. I know where we are and what’s coming next.

But if you’re married, there’s no dance. You are just there, in bed. So the dance becomes a micro dance. There are little cues you give the other person, a careful touch in a spot you don’t usually touch, a kiss that is a kiss that means this-is-not-a-goodnight-kiss, a pointed question like, did the kids fall asleep? These are tiny cues that have to come with other, tiny cues.

I tell the farmer, "I can’t take it. The subtle stuff. It's too much. Just tell me you want to have sex."

So a day went by, and he did that. He said, "I want to have sex."

I said, "Okay."

Then I said, "Hold it. This isn't fun. There needs to be something else."

So we went back to the dance. And I tried to pay close attention to nonverbal cues and then respond with the appropriate nonverbal cue.

Sometimes I can do that. Like if I take a Xanax. But a lot of times, he gives one nonverbal cue, like breathing warm and wet next to my ear. And I curl up in a ball.

I curl up in a ball and tell him I’m too anxious to have sex. Even after we have had sex hundreds of times. I still do it. At first he couldn’t believe it. But then he saw that I don’t know left and right, really, and my math skills end, largely, at third grade, and I am an idiot savant when it comes to memorizing statistics about Gen Y tendencies at work. So now he’s learned to believe anything. And he has learned that the only way to get me uncurled is to talk to me.

He does facts. He says what he’s doing with his hands, what he is feeling, what we will do, what I have done, he tries to stick to facts. And he narrates his movements as he goes. And he does not expect me to move or speak, until I’ve heard enough verbal cues to get back in the game.

Sometimes, when the farmer was dumping me, and people were saying, how can you stick with him? I would say, “He’s so good in bed.” And now you know what I mean.

riveting !
essential !
puts MSP and Hastings to shame in one move !

lorem ipsum gone lesbo, yeay !

#66 sunseeker

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 07:56 PM


What it's like to have sex with someone with Asperger's (on a Droid phone)

Posted to: Self-management
November 18th, 201 You think it would be really fun to have sex with me. Because, I think you can tell from my posts, I'll do anything. But maybe you can also tell from my posts that it's a little bit weird. Because you know that I'll say anything, too, but sometimes, I make you cringe.

I think I'm that way in bed, too.



It's sing along time everyone. "She's a very freaky girl, the kind you don't take home to mother". Rick James. Superfreak. The AC could use a little more of this sort of stuff. Where's Max Mosely when you need him?

#67 eric e

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 10:05 PM

funny

and

educational

but krispy

did you have to come out on SA?

#68 MAHGUAH_SCALPS_PILGRIMS

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Posted 12 February 2012 - 09:53 PM

US cites United Nations treaty in Megaupload case


Computerworld New Zealand
By Michael Foreman | Auckland | Monday, 13 February, 2012 The United States government will be relying on a United Nations treaty aimed at combating international organised crime as the legal basis of its extradition to the US of Megaupload founder Kim ...


#69 Te Kooti

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 04:02 AM

Several foreign police services have congratulated NZ cops on the decisive Dotcom swoop (which also netted Butterworth's bodyguard).

However, in the meamtime, there is a very interesting "terrorist" trial underway in the Akld supreme court.

Involves 4 people from the remote and isolated Urewera region of NZ.

A couple of Dotcom's mates have been released on bail.

But Comrade Kim is still incarcerated.



#70 SW Sailor

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 07:04 AM

And why should we care ?

#71 moon unit

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 07:18 AM

And why should we care ?





There may be some that are interested. You don't have to care at all.. You don't even have to read this thread
and you definately don't need to comment..

#72 Moonduster

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 08:14 AM

And why should we care?

That is the $64,000 question!

This is surely the most riveting action associated with the America's Cup and how could anyone possibly give a flying fuck?

It's all come down to endless jabberying about the body guard of the loser of the 33rd edition and whether his weapon of choice is technically classified as a shotgun or a pistol. This is the most relevant and fascinating aspect of AC34.

Can't you see the irony? Isn't it obvious that it's just so far of the fucking tracks that no one even pretends to care?

#73 dogwatch

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 08:22 AM

Physicists are seeking to create a Theory of Everything: that explains the behaviour of all matter from subatomic particles to entire galaxies. Little do they know that Hastings has already perfected the Theory of Everything. Everything is about the America's Cup and the America's Cup is about Everything.

#74 Albatros

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 10:43 AM

Physicists are seeking to create a Theory of Everything: that explains the behaviour of all matter from subatomic particles to entire galaxies. Little do they know that Hastings has already perfected the Theory of Everything. Everything is about the America's Cup and the America's Cup is about Everything.

so Hastings has figured out 42 ? give the man a Nobel prize for utter utter sillyness.

#75 ro!

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 04:05 PM


Physicists are seeking to create a Theory of Everything: that explains the behaviour of all matter from subatomic particles to entire galaxies. Little do they know that Hastings has already perfected the Theory of Everything. Everything is about the America's Cup and the America's Cup is about Everything.

so Hastings has figured out 42 ? give the man a Nobel prize for utter utter sillyness.


Ironic that the bodygaurd is in Nzed because Coutts and Butterworth had to hire him to protect themselves from threats of bodily harm by Blackheart pricks like hastings....

#76 Te Kooti

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 07:06 PM

Ironic that the bodygaurd is in Nzed because Coutts and Butterworth had to hire him to protect themselves from threats of bodily harm by Blackheart pricks like hastings....



You do not undestand irony.

Tempero is in NZ because he is a New Zealander.

His trial has not yet started.

If he acquires a criminal record his AC days might be over.

#77 ro!

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Posted 15 February 2012 - 07:54 PM


Ironic that the bodygaurd is in Nzed because Coutts and Butterworth had to hire him to protect themselves from threats of bodily harm by Blackheart pricks like hastings....



You do not undestand irony.

Tempero is in NZ because he is a New Zealander.

His trial has not yet started.

If he acquires a criminal record his AC days might be over.

The irony is hastings, this guy didn't have any AC days until Alinghi had to hire him to protect kiwi sailors from their fellow countrymen ..the Blackhearts...

#78 dogwatch

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Posted 16 February 2012 - 03:45 AM

Tempero......his AC days might be over.


I can hardly sleep for worrying about that but perhaps he could have a new career as a washer-up for this equally newsworthy AC participant http://www.americasc...f-Jose-Avillez/

#79 SW Sailor

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Posted 16 February 2012 - 05:08 AM



Ironic that the bodygaurd is in Nzed because Coutts and Butterworth had to hire him to protect themselves from threats of bodily harm by Blackheart pricks like hastings....



You do not undestand irony.

Tempero is in NZ because he is a New Zealander.

His trial has not yet started.

If he acquires a criminal record his AC days might be over.

The irony is hastings, this guy didn't have any AC days until Alinghi had to hire him to protect kiwi sailors from their fellow countrymen ..the Blackhearts...

What is a "Blackheart" anyway ?

#80 Albatros

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Posted 16 February 2012 - 08:33 AM

What is a "Blackheart" anyway ?

the extreme kiwi version of your Tea Party, so it seems, hence the reference to Tea Kootie




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