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Hey Bro, You Don't Fucking Sail.


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#1 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 04:55 PM

If any of you didn't know this, I got to a ritzy private school in Rhode Island. It's not Ivy and it's called a University, so it's easy to weed out which one it is. Here, we have a wonderful 70:30 ratio of guys to girls and of those guys, you come across most of the typical, college stereotypes that you'd encountered in my generation. You have the lax bro, with his calf-high socks, New Balance 574's, and some tattered mesh tanktop he got at lacrosse camp back in high school. You have the "swag" boys, with their overpriced Supreme clothing, New Era fitted/snapback, and some pair of Jordan's that my modest 2-week work study paycheck could afford. You have the typical Long Island prep, which his Ralph Lauren polos, his Vineyard Vines printed shorts (with those stupid fucking whales on them), and a pair of Sperry's. While all of these are intolerable, the "prep" makes me the most angry.

Just as I said before, I have a work study job. I work in the IT department, in laptop repairs. Essentially, it's glorified help desk shit, but we're a tier above the actual "Help Desk" and I get a lot of homework done sitting in the basement here, so I actually have no problems with it. But just today, one of these douchesloops comes in with a "problem". Still wearing his neon party sunglasses he got as a freebie from last year's Spring Weekend and some Croakies on the back, he plops his laptop down and says, "Wassup bro, I think I got a virus." Of course you have a virus, you probably spend your free time cruising asian ass porn when your roommates in class. This is all a procedure for me, so I get his info, slap a call ticket on it, and tell him he's good to go. As he's walking out, I notice a Mt. Gay hat attached to the loop on his backpack. I said, "hey, what regatta is that from?" He glances at me, flustered like a 12-year old opening his first Hustler, and says, "Oh, I don't know, I found it at my house."

Now, if you're going to try and be someone you're not, then you damn well play it off as well as you can. Seriously, there are about 3 dozen white boys that go here who truly believe their black and were raised in some sort of project, but at least they can walk the staggered pimp walk and talk the nonsense poor grammar talk. But why, why in the world would you find that hat and think, yeah, I have the right to wear this. At least bullshit it, at least read the fucking name of the goddamn regatta on the hat so you can at least tell someone who asks. The red hat isn't an accessory you grab from your Dad's closet, see a rum brand on it, and think, "Yes, this will go very well with my faded yellow shorts and an Abercrombie button-down." I was never one to get pissed off at this sort of thing, but that's just inane. I don't go around and advertise that I sail, because honestly, it's something that I'm proud of. I can count the occasions on my hand the number of times someone has asked me about a regatta shirt or the like, and it's nice to find out that someone else that goes to this shit-hole actually participates in sailing, but to go around and tell people you are something that you're not? Blows my mind.

But I suppose it would be hypocritical of me to say I've never done this. Before I actually screwed my head on straight and realized how much of condescending faggot I was, I was what you'd call a "hipster" in high school. Never to the point where I wore the black frame Ray-Ban glasses and worshipped the almighty Apple products, but more to where I listened to Joy Division a little too much and wore Vans checkered slip-ons. But that was a long time ago and goddamn, I would have beaten the shit out of old me. But everyone has that phase I suppose...

Just when you thought this was over, the kid comes back to pick up his virus-ridden computer (which there was actually a slew of porn in his recently visited history, ranging from some interracial DP, because the prick probably likes getting his sword crossed) and low and behold, guess who just stepped off his Melges...Captain Dickshitter. Mt. Gay hat still swinging from his North Face backpack but now, he's wearing a Slam technical cap. I don't even acknowledge his presence, I'm too busy typing something else, but he stands there for a good 30 seconds until I look up and say, "yes?" Oh, he's here to pick up his computer, well alright, let me get that for you. "Thank bro, what was wrong with it?" Just giving me an open door, alright. I respond, "Well, you had a few nasty viruses from some adult websites, so we removed those for you and you're all set." Kid stares at me, I give him a glance and sit back down in my station, and these two girl on the couch start the typical giggle and whisper routine. Sorry, not sorry.

Damn, I need a stiff drink and summer break.

#2 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:08 PM

I thick Thisse fitts niseley into the LR vaine, keepeup the goode worke. :)

#3 blackjenner

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:11 PM

"And now that I have said all this,
I must go see my therapist.
For I'm the very model of a
modern help desk masochist."

I get it. No one likes clueless poseurs. I hope this rant was useful to you.

By the way, "faggot" is still an insult for those not actually gay?

#4 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:13 PM

yes

#5 Rail Meat

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:18 PM

Gripes? You are in college, for pete's sake. I know it might feel as if you have the burden's of the world are on your shoulders, but you really should make sure you enjoy this particular period in your life. Because once you graduate, the paycheck will improve but everything else will be a down hill slide.

College was fricken awesome. Even with the classes, tests, homework, competition for some strange, and even the cliques. What ever the hell we called them back in the stone age.

#6 Sol Rosenberg

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:19 PM

What is "Joy Division"? I always thought it was the place where the legs meet.

#7 R Booze

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:20 PM

I've got a blue Mt. Gay t-shirt that I didn't 'win'. Tuff shit. But I've heard the worse thing you can do is walk into a bar wearing military insignia that you never earned. Which will result in an ass-douching about 60% nicer than the one you'd have recieved from pretending to be a SEAL.....

#8 Friggin' in the Riggin'

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:26 PM

What is "Joy Division"? I always thought it was the place where the legs meet.

You are half right it's where they divide.

#9 smackdaddy

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:28 PM

I have to admit - I'm having a hard time dredging up a damn on this one.

#10 DoRag

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:32 PM

Gripes? You are in college, for pete's sake. I know it might feel as if you have the burden's of the world are on your shoulders, but you really should make sure you enjoy this particular period in your life. Because once you graduate, the paycheck will improve but everything else will be a down hill slide.

College was fricken awesome. Even with the classes, tests, homework, competition for some strange, and even the cliques. What ever the hell we called them back in the stone age.


You went to class? Oh, yes, I forgot that you needed that trophy...

#11 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:32 PM

I've got a blue Mt. Gay t-shirt that I didn't 'win'. Tuff shit. But I've heard the worse thing you can do is walk into a bar wearing military insignia that you never earned. Which will result in an ass-douching about 60% nicer than the one you'd have recieved from pretending to be a SEAL.....

an nonbody weares USMC stuffe....evere, unlesse of corse you were. :)

#12 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:32 PM

By the way, "faggot" is still an insult for those not actually gay?


Yeah...it's a bundle of sticks, I know. Lot of guys take offense to it, I was just running out of creative names.

Gripes? You are in college, for pete's sake. I know it might feel as if you have the burden's of the world are on your shoulders, but you really should make sure you enjoy this particular period in your life. Because once you graduate, the paycheck will improve but everything else will be a down hill slide.

College was fricken awesome. Even with the classes, tests, homework, competition for some strange, and even the cliques. What ever the hell we called them back in the stone age.


Trust me RM, I'm enjoying the hell out of it. Small things like that just test me, that's all.

I've got a blue Mt. Gay t-shirt that I didn't 'win'. Tuff shit. But I've heard the worse thing you can do is walk into a bar wearing military insignia that you never earned. Which will result in an ass-douching about 60% nicer than the one you'd have recieved from pretending to be a SEAL.....


10000% agree. This is minor in the big scheme of things.

#13 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:33 PM


Gripes? You are in college, for pete's sake. I know it might feel as if you have the burden's of the world are on your shoulders, but you really should make sure you enjoy this particular period in your life. Because once you graduate, the paycheck will improve but everything else will be a down hill slide.

College was fricken awesome. Even with the classes, tests, homework, competition for some strange, and even the cliques. What ever the hell we called them back in the stone age.


You went to class? Oh, yes, I forgot that you needed that trophy...

frends foure evere :)

#14 Lee G

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:49 PM

I have about 50 mt gay hats that I'd love to get rid of - think there is a market selling them to these rich prepschool douches? I'm sure daddy wouldnt miss the $50.

I'm serious.

#15 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 05:51 PM

I have about 50 mt gay hats that I'd love to get rid of - think there is a market selling them to these rich prepschool douches? I'm sure daddy wouldnt miss the $50.

I'm serious.


These kids will buy anything. I helped a guy last semester sell t-shirts of Jack Daniel's and Absolut vodka bottle that said "Bryant" instead of the real logo for $20 a pop, costs $7 a piece to print 'em

#16 SailRacer

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:03 PM

Closest to a LR rant I have seen in a while.

Sail Safe!

#17 FOOKINWAVE

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:17 PM

Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.

#18 Windward

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:21 PM

yes


No typo for Snaggy! Wow.

DDE, your typos notwithstanding, that was funny.

Generations change, the crap we endure in school with cliques stay the same. Humans are strange.

#19 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:42 PM

It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.

#20 R Booze

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:46 PM

It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.



Good onya. Now that you finally realize that you are indeed special......wanna go gun shopping some day?.....

#21 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:47 PM

Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.



Good onya. Now that you finally realize that you are indeed special......wanna go gun shopping some day?.....


Yes. Time to thin the herd.

#22 R Booze

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:52 PM

I knew you'd eventually come around....

#23 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 06:58 PM


Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).

#24 FOOKINWAVE

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:00 PM

First beach has it all. Where else can you see a girl come to the beach in high heels. The reason the lax bro scores so much more then you do is because he speaks their language. GET OUT OF THE BASEMENT.

#25 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:06 PM



Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.




#26 Owen

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:07 PM

Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


heh.

#27 Mojo Risin

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:11 PM

It's a hat, big f'in deal.

#28 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:13 PM

First beach has it all. Where else can you see a girl come to the beach in high heels. The reason the lax bro scores so much more then you do is because he speaks their language. GET OUT OF THE BASEMENT.


Since when did a series of grunts, growls and hand gestures become a language (outside of africa)?

The skanks who speak that language aren't remotely interesting which in turn makes then unattractive. Boring is a turn off.

#29 aA

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:14 PM

post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job

#30 On the Hard

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:19 PM

I, for one, thought this was a funny thread. I'm not sure if I'm a former sailor or former Lacrosse player. I wear "Vanderbilt- Lacrosse" T-shirt when I work out, but apparently the 40+ yr/old divorcees don't yet know that makes me cool! :lol:

Seriously, though, I agree about the posers. Back in my day posers came in various stripes, but the psuedo preps were the worst. Most of them weren't even preps, but were dressing to look the part. This was the day of the Preppy Handbook. Sometimes you've just got to wonder how some people can go through life so shallow.

#31 notallthere

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:20 PM

post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job


^ GOLD!

#32 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:25 PM

post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?

#33 DarthSailor

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:26 PM




Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.



As a counter point if you have to date crazy ( and I recommend it at least once) college is the best place. Your car is shitty, you have nothing of real value so that when the time comes for the crazy to get out (and it will come) her taking a key or paint to your car just adds character. Additionally when she starts throwing shit around your place/dorm the fact that nothing she breaks is worth shit will be a comfort.

#34 Mojo Risin

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:28 PM


post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?


Someone with a really bad sense of style.

#35 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:30 PM





Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.



As a counter point if you have to date crazy ( and I recommend it at least once) college is the best place. Your car is shitty, you have nothing of real value so that when the time comes for the crazy to get out (and it will come) her taking a key or paint to your car just adds character. Additionally when she starts throwing shit around your place/dorm the fact that nothing she breaks is worth shit will be a comfort.


My ex liked to accuse her previous boyfriends of molesting her. Most of the time the police were smart enough to see through it but sometimes they had to lawyer up.

#36 smackdaddy

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:30 PM


post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?


Hoarder.

#37 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:32 PM

First beach has it all. Where else can you see a girl come to the beach in high heels. The reason the lax bro scores so much more then you do is because he speaks their language. GET OUT OF THE BASEMENT.


Huffing West Systems lost it's cool in middle school, bro.

#38 R Booze

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:36 PM



post 80's mt gay hats are toolbag detection devices...sounds like it did its job


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?


Someone with a really bad sense of style.



An unhetero interior designer in training?...

#39 Wreck™

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 07:49 PM

What is "Joy Division"? I always thought it was the place where the legs meet.

It's a new order

#40 aA

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:10 PM

What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?



conclusion: interesting decoration technique, but not my style




random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum

#41 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:12 PM

random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"

#42 12345

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:22 PM

What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?


Yawn, I have shoe boxes full of em which is a better place for them IMO.

Just curious what do the conquest of the evening think of you decorating style?

#43 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:24 PM

Just curious what do the conquest of the evening think of you decorating style?

His prayeng to fiende oute soone. :)

#44 bljones

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:27 PM

.... New Balance 574's... Supreme clothing, New Era ...Ralph Lauren ...Vineyard Vines... Sperry's. ...Croakies ....

But I suppose it would be hypocritical of me....

Yeah.

When you're busting on the labels by name, that's not irony, that's envy.

I bet hat-boy with the porn is describing you to his buddies as "jealous, petty nerd trash."

He might not be wrong.

Like college office politics, college student gripes are so vicious because they are so meaningless..

#45 dde

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:27 PM

Just curious what do the conquest of the evening think of you decorating style?


The only thing with a vagina to step foot in that room is flyingtacks or someone's mother helping move them in.

Can't be pretty.

#46 B.J. Porter

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:33 PM







You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.



As a counter point if you have to date crazy ( and I recommend it at least once) college is the best place. Your car is shitty, you have nothing of real value so that when the time comes for the crazy to get out (and it will come) her taking a key or paint to your car just adds character. Additionally when she starts throwing shit around your place/dorm the fact that nothing she breaks is worth shit will be a comfort.


My ex liked to accuse her previous boyfriends of molesting her. Most of the time the police were smart enough to see through it but sometimes they had to lawyer up.


Wait a minute...YOU have an ex? Get a hand amputated or something??

#47 blackjenner

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:48 PM

I have to admit - I'm having a hard time dredging up a damn on this one.


My friends call it "having no fucks to give."

#48 R Booze

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:52 PM







Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.



As a counter point if you have to date crazy ( and I recommend it at least once) college is the best place. Your car is shitty, you have nothing of real value so that when the time comes for the crazy to get out (and it will come) her taking a key or paint to your car just adds character. Additionally when she starts throwing shit around your place/dorm the fact that nothing she breaks is worth shit will be a comfort.


My ex liked to accuse her previous boyfriends of molesting her. Most of the time the police were smart enough to see through it but sometimes they had to lawyer up.


Wait a minute...YOU have an ex? Get a hand amputated or something??



Check to Penthouse bounced....

#49 Snaggletooth

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 08:58 PM

checke, vikky mendooza dinagonale :)

#50 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:07 PM

Wait a minute...YOU have an ex? Get a hand amputated or something??


This is no great surprise, is it?

This one did inhabit the Shellie Gillespie zone though... Redhead.

#51 aA

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:20 PM

Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"


so do you duck walk down the hallway or just let that ish smack your melon while walking down the hall?

#52 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:23 PM


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"


so do you duck walk down the hallway or just let that ish smack your melon while walking down the hall?


Get hit, but it's not my place so that's all fine.

Edit: You didn't think I was the tool/poser/dick did you?! :lol:

#53 Mojo Risin

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:30 PM



Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"


so do you duck walk down the hallway or just let that ish smack your melon while walking down the hall?


Get hit, but it's not my place so that's all fine.

Edit: You didn't think I was the tool/poser/dick did you?! :lol:


If the hat fits.

#54 Sublime

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:32 PM

Doesn't anybody know how to give a wedgie anymore?

#55 Left Hook

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 09:40 PM

Doesn't anybody know how to give a wedgie anymore?


knowing the type of person I wouldn't be surprised if a wedgie was met with legal action from the family lawyer.

#56 KRC

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 10:07 PM

Re: OP -- It's a good thing he doesn't go to my old school. He'd have flipped his shit by now, but it would have made the ensuing rant far more amusing. There, we had a bar near campus called the "Wabash Yacht Club". It should be noted that the nearest navigable water was Lake Michigan -- over 90 miles away. Nicknamed "Stacks" by those who frequented it (apparently because you could find "stacks" of douchebags piled in there on any given night...nobody knows the real reason), it is/was a place to be avoided at all costs, unless orange skin, highlights, and more popped-collar polo shirts than you can count on guys who divide their time between the gym and the tanning salon is your thing. The place had a perpetual reek of vomit wafting out of the door, too.

#57 mustang__1

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Posted 11 April 2012 - 10:55 PM

It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.


havent you put your mt. gay hats through the wash to make them look more worn out because you said that would make you look cooler than wearing a brand new one?

#58 Left Hook

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:07 AM


It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.


havent you put your mt. gay hats through the wash to make them look more worn out because you said that would make you look cooler than wearing a brand new one?


I have never done that, just mused that it's a way to do so.

#59 R Booze

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:16 AM



It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.


havent you put your mt. gay hats through the wash to make them look more worn out because you said that would make you look cooler than wearing a brand new one?


I have never done that, just mused that it's a way to do so.



Well, you could always marinate it in dingy puke....

#60 chinabald

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:24 AM


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?


Yawn, I have shoe boxes full of em which is a better place for them IMO.

Just curious what do the conquest of the evening think of you decorating style?


He will have to get back with you on that question. Once he has a conquest.

#61 B.J. Porter

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:15 AM


Wait a minute...YOU have an ex? Get a hand amputated or something??


This is no great surprise, is it?

This one did inhabit the Shellie Gillespie zone though... Redhead.



Too bad about Pillpants. Maybe next time.



#62 kevlar®

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:28 AM

If any of you didn't know this, I got to a ritzy private school in Rhode Island. It's not Ivy and it's called a University, so it's easy to weed out which one it is. Here, we have a wonderful 70:30 ratio of guys to girls and of those guys, you come across most of the typical, college stereotypes that you'd encountered in my generation. You have the lax bro, with his calf-high socks, New Balance 574's, and some tattered mesh tanktop he got at lacrosse camp back in high school. You have the "swag" boys, with their overpriced Supreme clothing, New Era fitted/snapback, and some pair of Jordan's that my modest 2-week work study paycheck could afford. You have the typical Long Island prep, which his Ralph Lauren polos, his Vineyard Vines printed shorts (with those stupid fucking whales on them), and a pair of Sperry's. While all of these are intolerable, the "prep" makes me the most angry.

Just as I said before, I have a work study job. I work in the IT department, in laptop repairs. Essentially, it's glorified help desk shit, but we're a tier above the actual "Help Desk" and I get a lot of homework done sitting in the basement here, so I actually have no problems with it. But just today, one of these douchesloops comes in with a "problem". Still wearing his neon party sunglasses he got as a freebie from last year's Spring Weekend and some Croakies on the back, he plops his laptop down and says, "Wassup bro, I think I got a virus." Of course you have a virus, you probably spend your free time cruising asian ass porn when your roommates in class. This is all a procedure for me, so I get his info, slap a call ticket on it, and tell him he's good to go. As he's walking out, I notice a Mt. Gay hat attached to the loop on his backpack. I said, "hey, what regatta is that from?" He glances at me, flustered like a 12-year old opening his first Hustler, and says, "Oh, I don't know, I found it at my house."

Now, if you're going to try and be someone you're not, then you damn well play it off as well as you can. Seriously, there are about 3 dozen white boys that go here who truly believe their black and were raised in some sort of project, but at least they can walk the staggered pimp walk and talk the nonsense poor grammar talk. But why, why in the world would you find that hat and think, yeah, I have the right to wear this. At least bullshit it, at least read the fucking name of the goddamn regatta on the hat so you can at least tell someone who asks. The red hat isn't an accessory you grab from your Dad's closet, see a rum brand on it, and think, "Yes, this will go very well with my faded yellow shorts and an Abercrombie button-down." I was never one to get pissed off at this sort of thing, but that's just inane. I don't go around and advertise that I sail, because honestly, it's something that I'm proud of. I can count the occasions on my hand the number of times someone has asked me about a regatta shirt or the like, and it's nice to find out that someone else that goes to this shit-hole actually participates in sailing, but to go around and tell people you are something that you're not? Blows my mind.

But I suppose it would be hypocritical of me to say I've never done this. Before I actually screwed my head on straight and realized how much of condescending faggot I was, I was what you'd call a "hipster" in high school. Never to the point where I wore the black frame Ray-Ban glasses and worshipped the almighty Apple products, but more to where I listened to Joy Division a little too much and wore Vans checkered slip-ons. But that was a long time ago and goddamn, I would have beaten the shit out of old me. But everyone has that phase I suppose...

Just when you thought this was over, the kid comes back to pick up his virus-ridden computer (which there was actually a slew of porn in his recently visited history, ranging from some interracial DP, because the prick probably likes getting his sword crossed) and low and behold, guess who just stepped off his Melges...Captain Dickshitter. Mt. Gay hat still swinging from his North Face backpack but now, he's wearing a Slam technical cap. I don't even acknowledge his presence, I'm too busy typing something else, but he stands there for a good 30 seconds until I look up and say, "yes?" Oh, he's here to pick up his computer, well alright, let me get that for you. "Thank bro, what was wrong with it?" Just giving me an open door, alright. I respond, "Well, you had a few nasty viruses from some adult websites, so we removed those for you and you're all set." Kid stares at me, I give him a glance and sit back down in my station, and these two girl on the couch start the typical giggle and whisper routine. Sorry, not sorry.

Damn, I need a stiff drink and summer break.


Posted Image

Tonight's homework: Photoshop a Mt. Gay hat on this dude, and FOR FUCK'S SAKE understand the difference between there/their/they're.

#63 Timo42

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:46 AM


random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"



Soooo, you were on your knees in some guy's hat shrine...

#64 chinabald

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:48 AM



random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"



Soooo, you were on your knees in some guy's hat shrine...


Mt Gay, its more then just a rum. Its a lifestyle choice/

#65 R Booze

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:49 AM



random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"



Soooo, you were on your knees in some guy's hat shrine...




:lol:.......

#66 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:59 AM

and FOR FUCK'S SAKE understand the difference between there/their/they're.


Not sure what you're talking about, didn't find a mistake in there. A few spelling errors, but that's just because I typed that shit fast.

#67 MR.CLEAN

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:59 AM

What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?


I hear he is a dick.

#68 Left Hook

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:03 AM


What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?


I hear he is a dick.


You would be right!

#69 Left Hook

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:06 AM



random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"



Soooo, you were on your knees in some guy's hat shrine...


The sheer number of hats... it got me all hot and bothered.

#70 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:22 AM

The sheer number of hats... it got me all hot and bothered.


Must be hard to walk into a Lids store and not soak your panties.

#71 Evo

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:52 AM

I have about 50 mt gay hats that I'd love to get rid of - think there is a market

I'm serious.


probably get you a dozen painted crayfish per hat in the Torres Islands of Vanuatu.....throw in a bar of soap and you might get two dozen

hope that helps mr serious

#72 Evo

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 05:23 AM

Posted Image

#73 GybeSet®

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 07:45 AM

What then would your conclusion about a person with a hallway like this in their house?

Posted Image

Toolbag? Poser? Dick?

conclusion: interesting decoration technique, but not my style

random observation: you must be on the smaller end of the vertical spectrum


.
Incorrect. Taken from on a knee to get it all in the shot.

6'4"


can you pan down to the Crocs ,

50 pair every color ?

#74 sailforbeer

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 10:59 AM

The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.

#75 jkdubs808

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 11:00 AM




It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.


havent you put your mt. gay hats through the wash to make them look more worn out because you said that would make you look cooler than wearing a brand new one?


I have never done that, just mused that it's a way to do so.



Well, you could always marinate it in dingy puke....


Boot juice at the end of a full day of racing. Unzip boot slightly, take off foot and zip back up....especially the Gill neoprene ones......they retain boot juice nastiness like you wouldn't believe. Couple douses of that a week for a few months and your Mt Gay hat will look like its been through 3 Transpacs.

You're welcome Wes.......

Stang you should have known about this method..........dissappointed

I have around 40 of them as well. A collection started by my father from all the regattas he's been in, continued by my older brother and myself from various regattas. Ours are all regattas we've sailed in, though.

Don't worry about the posers, G, we know who we are and what we do. Fuck them if they want to be like us but can't.

Wait, hold up.



LH has had a girlfriend before??

#76 Snaggletooth

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 11:57 AM

The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

ok :)

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

what op shoud be doing is up to hime. Teh saltie hoomere colores the grannier side coillege snappe shotte givene in thisse op-ed. :)

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

what colletore shoud be doing is up to hime. His is of the beste sailores from W@LIS! :)

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

stats same as lyes :)

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.

we alle neede to sail more, halve a goode daye! :)

#77 jkdubs808

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 12:38 PM

Once again, the snags has spoken...............

Heed the words from the wise one

#78 soak_ed

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:04 PM




Shit thanks for the info on how the R.I. educational land scape has changed from a social point for view. You should be glad you have such posser amongst your mist. This will help you score more with the laddies. Hint chic don't fucking care if you sail or not. Only if they are in to sailing will it matter. I always found the girls who didnt sail smelled nicer had better undies. Hint get out of the Basement. The basement is no good.


You would think that!! In fact the opposite is true. Somehow here in the northeast the lax bro has apparently risen to the pinnacle of sexual virility. You would think that each and every one of them were the last man on earth when you realize how much tail they're getting... it's unreal. I've seen non-lacrosse players throw down the better part of 100 dollars for rejected team gear (wrong color) so that they could wear them out at bars and parties to score chicks.


Depends who you're trying to attract. The girl I'm dating now absolutely despises the "bro" look and I caught the good side of a slap when I stepped outside in a Flow Society tank and flip-flops (as a joke).


I maintain that the only reason she's into you is that she's crazy 8 ways to sunday and you'll find out when things go all Fatal Attraction later on.




Coming from the boy whose only relationship in his life has been with his right hand, just how do you think you can give meaningful advice to a peer who actually has a girlfriend?

#79 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:12 PM

The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.


It's always entertaining when someone tries to act offended and post some sort of half-assed, inexplicit rant in order to 1-up the original post in a thread. Oh, your panties are in a bunch? Maybe you should untwist them and while you're fooling around in your undies, be sure to take a broom or a fucking dust buster to get all the damn sand out of your vagina. Yup, I didn't stutter cupcake, I said vagina. What's that? Never seen one in your life? That's alright, we can expect you to pursue that fantasy when you're too busy bone-lipping your mates. No need to pretend you're back in college, because that's what every pathetic middle-aged man does. He tries to hang out with younger guys, pretends to enjoy drinking shitty beer at the bar, hits on women that are half his age, and that's the liberty out of his meaningless pointless life to come play tough guy on the computer it took him 15 minutes to figure out to turn on. Don't you fret about not living your college days anymore, I'm sure by the way you probably pat yourself on the back for that limp-dick attempt at something maybe humorous, you're were always a push-over to begin with. Some day, you'll give up the "I boned the owner's daughter" dream, because you'll be that guy with the daughter soon enough once you find some sorry excuse for a wife and all your daughters will be butterfaces.

Cheers, mate.

#80 Snaggletooth

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 01:26 PM

damm datts entretaimente! :)

#81 jkdubs808

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:01 PM


The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.


It's always entertaining when someone tries to act offended and post some sort of half-assed, inexplicit rant in order to 1-up the original post in a thread. Oh, your panties are in a bunch? Maybe you should untwist them and while you're fooling around in your undies, be sure to take a broom or a fucking dust buster to get all the damn sand out of your vagina. Yup, I didn't stutter cupcake, I said vagina. What's that? Never seen one in your life? That's alright, we can expect you to pursue that fantasy when you're too busy bone-lipping your mates. No need to pretend you're back in college, because that's what every pathetic middle-aged man does. He tries to hang out with younger guys, pretends to enjoy drinking shitty beer at the bar, hits on women that are half his age, and that's the liberty out of his meaningless pointless life to come play tough guy on the computer it took him 15 minutes to figure out to turn on. Don't you fret about not living your college days anymore, I'm sure by the way you probably pat yourself on the back for that limp-dick attempt at something maybe humorous, you're were always a push-over to begin with. Some day, you'll give up the "I boned the owner's daughter" dream, because you'll be that guy with the daughter soon enough once you find some sorry excuse for a wife and all your daughters will be butterfaces.

Cheers, mate.



Damn G, let it all out bud! :lol:

FYI, the whole banging the owners daughter thing doesn't usually end in your favor......just sayin. Wes you better take notes on what I just said.

#82 CharlieCobra

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:03 PM


It would be semi-alright if the brotastic lax-douches were at least interesting to hold a conversation with. Sadly I've yet to have an interaction with one that didn't result in a few of my brain cells offing themselves out of misery. Utterly dully, boring, communications majors with the intellectual power of boiled cabbage and just as much flavor.


I try to avoid that particular variety of failed genetic mutation as much as possible. Sorry you had to fall into the vortex.


havent you put your mt. gay hats through the wash to make them look more worn out because you said that would make you look cooler than wearing a brand new one?



Nope, don't have one...B)

#83 Junkyard Dog

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:07 PM

Nice rant. I am a bit disturbed with your knowledge of men's fashion, but otherwise well done.

#84 smackdaddy

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:11 PM


The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.


It's always entertaining when someone tries to act offended and post some sort of half-assed, inexplicit rant in order to 1-up the original post in a thread. Oh, your panties are in a bunch? Maybe you should untwist them and while you're fooling around in your undies, be sure to take a broom or a fucking dust buster to get all the damn sand out of your vagina. Yup, I didn't stutter cupcake, I said vagina. What's that? Never seen one in your life? That's alright, we can expect you to pursue that fantasy when you're too busy bone-lipping your mates. No need to pretend you're back in college, because that's what every pathetic middle-aged man does. He tries to hang out with younger guys, pretends to enjoy drinking shitty beer at the bar, hits on women that are half his age, and that's the liberty out of his meaningless pointless life to come play tough guy on the computer it took him 15 minutes to figure out to turn on. Don't you fret about not living your college days anymore, I'm sure by the way you probably pat yourself on the back for that limp-dick attempt at something maybe humorous, you're were always a push-over to begin with. Some day, you'll give up the "I boned the owner's daughter" dream, because you'll be that guy with the daughter soon enough once you find some sorry excuse for a wife and all your daughters will be butterfaces.

Cheers, mate.


Actually, I'd have to give the nod to sailforbeer on this one. Well played sir.

#85 Snaggletooth

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:32 PM

I have to admit - I'm having a hard time dredging up a damn on this one.





Class let's review:

Cheers, mate.

Actually, I'd have to give the nod to sailforbeer on this one. Well played sir.

You fonde one!! Goode jobbe! :)

#86 huckster_one

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:33 PM


The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.


It's always entertaining when someone tries to act offended and post some sort of half-assed, inexplicit rant in order to 1-up the original post in a thread. Oh, your panties are in a bunch? Maybe you should untwist them and while you're fooling around in your undies, be sure to take a broom or a fucking dust buster to get all the damn sand out of your vagina. Yup, I didn't stutter cupcake, I said vagina. What's that? Never seen one in your life? That's alright, we can expect you to pursue that fantasy when you're too busy bone-lipping your mates. No need to pretend you're back in college, because that's what every pathetic middle-aged man does. He tries to hang out with younger guys, pretends to enjoy drinking shitty beer at the bar, hits on women that are half his age, and that's the liberty out of his meaningless pointless life to come play tough guy on the computer it took him 15 minutes to figure out to turn on. Don't you fret about not living your college days anymore, I'm sure by the way you probably pat yourself on the back for that limp-dick attempt at something maybe humorous, you're were always a push-over to begin with. Some day, you'll give up the "I boned the owner's daughter" dream, because you'll be that guy with the daughter soon enough once you find some sorry excuse for a wife and all your daughters will be butterfaces.

Cheers, mate.


EASY kiddo, it's always funny when a 20yr old pussy cries about getting called out. You should be posting pictures of you're crazy slutty girlfriend instead of admitting how you're parents failed and raised a snively little bitch like you. Next time you run into this situation do what every man would do. 1) Take the hat from the poser and explain to him that it's now a real man's hat(hint you'd be the real man here). 2) When he says "WHOA BRO" take that right hand you finger bang that slut with and make him tell you how good she tastes as you knock a couple of teeth around in his head.3) Tell the chicks in the lab how manly YOU are and that you'd love for them to join you and said slut tonight for some Hunger Games at the dorm/appt. You can even be nice enough to get the fairy roomie laid USING the powers of manhood you now have over every girl on campus that will soon be lining up outside the door for you to man up inside their slippery gashes. THIS is how a man would ahve reacted and the story he would have told. Go back to thinking to yourself about how important what you have to say is, cause really IT'S NOT!!!

#87 Snaggletooth

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 02:36 PM

wowe, juste woe.... :)






thisse licke a intweb rorshocke teste. :)

#88 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:05 PM

EASY kiddo, it's always funny when a 20yr old pussy cries about getting called out. You should be posting pictures of you're crazy slutty girlfriend instead of admitting how you're parents failed and raised a snively little bitch like you. Next time you run into this situation do what every man would do. 1) Take the hat from the poser and explain to him that it's now a real man's hat(hint you'd be the real man here). 2) When he says "WHOA BRO" take that right hand you finger bang that slut with and make him tell you how good she tastes as you knock a couple of teeth around in his head.3) Tell the chicks in the lab how manly YOU are and that you'd love for them to join you and said slut tonight for some Hunger Games at the dorm/appt. You can even be nice enough to get the fairy roomie laid USING the powers of manhood you now have over every girl on campus that will soon be lining up outside the door for you to man up inside their slippery gashes. THIS is how a man would ahve reacted and the story he would have told. Go back to thinking to yourself about how important what you have to say is, cause really IT'S NOT!!!


I honestly don't know what's more pathetic about this post; the fact that you could not write a literate sentence if your sorry excuse for a life depended on it, or you had to pull in family/significant others in order to hit a nerve point. Huckster, I like to base people's shortcomings off of what they share with the world. In this post, you have exemplified the fact that not only does poor grammar run in your piss-poor gene pool, but maybe you should have asked one of your two dads to teach you the difference between your and you're instead of having them play Master's Par 3 Contest in your bedroom every night. But I don't judge on people's upbringing or their obvious shortcomings, because that's not right. I'd love to hear you spin a tale about how you've done what you've described in the post above, but just like the poser in the Mt. Gay hat, I could give a fuck less.

L'chaim, dude.

#89 Left Hook

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:14 PM

The premise of this thread is gayer than a Mount Fucking Gay hat. Class let's review:

There are only four things the OP should be doing in college. Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. Posting long-ass stories of some lax boy who has the wrong hat is so fucking pathetic that it is beyond pathetic. Get a fucking life.

Anyone who collects Mt Gay hats as a sign of their sailing prowess is a douchenozzle. Do you look up at those hats in your hallway and touch yourself in a meaningful way and think oh boy Russell Coouts here I come? What the fuck? Keeping a hat or two as a mememto of a great regatta, like the one you won, or the one that you banged the owner's daugher (or better, wife), sure, that's a prize. But a collection? Get a fucking life.

Over the years I have done an exhaustive statistical study and determined that 2% of the Mt-Gay-hat-wearing-population don't sail but seem to think they are somehow cooler due to their stolen hat; 2% actually sailed in some regatta and can wear the hat and look cool at the same time; and the other 94% think that they are the most awesome yachtsmen on the planet but in reality are the leeward runner trimmer on some hagged-out IOR shitbox. Or a fucking college kid who still thinks Mt Landt hats are cool.

As for getting a life, I have to go to my meaningless pointless job to eek out a living so that I can afford to go sailing, go drink beer with my mates and pretend that I am back in collge. If you are reading this, turn off your fucking computer, take off the Gay hat, and go outside and get some fresh air, sunshine and go sailing. But for the love of god, beer and pussy, stop fucking talking about what fucking hat some asshose is wearing.


Well then maybe you should have been doing something else in college besides "Going to class or doing the bare minimum of study work to not get thrown out. Drinking. Getting laid or trying to get laid. Sleeping. " Maybe that would have helped you not wind up in such a suck ass job. Cause-->Effect buddy.

And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!

LH has had a girlfriend before??


Eat me Jesse

FYI, the whole banging the owners daughter thing doesn't usually end in your favor......just sayin. Wes you better take notes on what I just said.


Need further explanation.

#90 grabbler

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:25 PM



#91 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:26 PM

And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<

#92 Left Hook

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:28 PM


And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<


It came to me last night in one of those flashes of inspiration. "And henceforth, he shall be known as Thunderdick"

You survived dinner I see.

#93 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:33 PM



And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<


It came to me last night in one of those flashes of inspiration. "And henceforth, he shall be known as Thunderdick"

You survived dinner I see.


I want to say they know better...but it was never brought up and everyone seemed pretty nice, so I think I'm in the clear for now.

#94 USA190520

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:39 PM



And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<


It came on me last night "And henceforth, he shall be known as Thunderdick"

You survived dinner I see.


Hat worthy.

#95 mikewof

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 03:59 PM



And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<


It came to me last night in one of those flashes of inspiration. "And henceforth, he shall be known as Thunderdick"

You survived dinner I see.


Enjoy it all while it lasts boys, one little ring and two little words are on both of your horizons, and they're going to roll over you both like a shitdozer in a shitblizzard.

#96 Snaggletooth

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:03 PM




And btw, Thunderdick here who posted this thread has probably spent more time in his last 3 years of college drinking and getting laid than you have your entire life.

Cheers!


Thanks for the nickname <_<


It came to me last night in one of those flashes of inspiration. "And henceforth, he shall be known as Thunderdick"

You survived dinner I see.


Enjoy it all while it lasts boys, one little ring and two little words are on both of your horizons, and they're going to roll over you both like a shitdozer.

Is legalle in RI fore them gette marriede? I no NY & Cali.....:)

#97 RumLine

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:03 PM

If any of you didn't know this, I got to a ritzy private school in Rhode Island. It's not Ivy and it's called a University, so it's easy to weed out which one it is. Here, we have a wonderful 70:30 ratio of guys to girls and of those guys, you come across most of the typical, college stereotypes that you'd encountered in my generation. You have the lax bro, with his calf-high socks, New Balance 574's, and some tattered mesh tanktop he got at lacrosse camp back in high school. You have the "swag" boys, with their overpriced Supreme clothing, New Era fitted/snapback, and some pair of Jordan's that my modest 2-week work study paycheck could afford. You have the typical Long Island prep, which his Ralph Lauren polos, his Vineyard Vines printed shorts (with those stupid fucking whales on them), and a pair of Sperry's. While all of these are intolerable, the "prep" makes me the most angry.

Just as I said before, I have a work study job. I work in the IT department, in laptop repairs. Essentially, it's glorified help desk shit, but we're a tier above the actual "Help Desk" and I get a lot of homework done sitting in the basement here, so I actually have no problems with it. But just today, one of these douchesloops comes in with a "problem". Still wearing his neon party sunglasses he got as a freebie from last year's Spring Weekend and some Croakies on the back, he plops his laptop down and says, "Wassup bro, I think I got a virus." Of course you have a virus, you probably spend your free time cruising asian ass porn when your roommates in class. This is all a procedure for me, so I get his info, slap a call ticket on it, and tell him he's good to go. As he's walking out, I notice a Mt. Gay hat attached to the loop on his backpack. I said, "hey, what regatta is that from?" He glances at me, flustered like a 12-year old opening his first Hustler, and says, "Oh, I don't know, I found it at my house."

Now, if you're going to try and be someone you're not, then you damn well play it off as well as you can. Seriously, there are about 3 dozen white boys that go here who truly believe their black and were raised in some sort of project, but at least they can walk the staggered pimp walk and talk the nonsense poor grammar talk. But why, why in the world would you find that hat and think, yeah, I have the right to wear this. At least bullshit it, at least read the fucking name of the goddamn regatta on the hat so you can at least tell someone who asks. The red hat isn't an accessory you grab from your Dad's closet, see a rum brand on it, and think, "Yes, this will go very well with my faded yellow shorts and an Abercrombie button-down." I was never one to get pissed off at this sort of thing, but that's just inane. I don't go around and advertise that I sail, because honestly, it's something that I'm proud of. I can count the occasions on my hand the number of times someone has asked me about a regatta shirt or the like, and it's nice to find out that someone else that goes to this shit-hole actually participates in sailing, but to go around and tell people you are something that you're not? Blows my mind.

But I suppose it would be hypocritical of me to say I've never done this. Before I actually screwed my head on straight and realized how much of condescending faggot I was, I was what you'd call a "hipster" in high school. Never to the point where I wore the black frame Ray-Ban glasses and worshipped the almighty Apple products, but more to where I listened to Joy Division a little too much and wore Vans checkered slip-ons. But that was a long time ago and goddamn, I would have beaten the shit out of old me. But everyone has that phase I suppose...

Just when you thought this was over, the kid comes back to pick up his virus-ridden computer (which there was actually a slew of porn in his recently visited history, ranging from some interracial DP, because the prick probably likes getting his sword crossed) and low and behold, guess who just stepped off his Melges...Captain Dickshitter. Mt. Gay hat still swinging from his North Face backpack but now, he's wearing a Slam technical cap. I don't even acknowledge his presence, I'm too busy typing something else, but he stands there for a good 30 seconds until I look up and say, "yes?" Oh, he's here to pick up his computer, well alright, let me get that for you. "Thank bro, what was wrong with it?" Just giving me an open door, alright. I respond, "Well, you had a few nasty viruses from some adult websites, so we removed those for you and you're all set." Kid stares at me, I give him a glance and sit back down in my station, and these two girl on the couch start the typical giggle and whisper routine. Sorry, not sorry.

Damn, I need a stiff drink and summer break.


"Just fix the fucking computer, ok brah? And when you're done why don't you swing by the frat house and wash my yellow Defender 90, it's the one with the ACK circle sticker on the back. I'll throw you a sixer of PBR tallboys for your trouble."

Nice rant, made me laugh.

#98 On the Hard

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:04 PM

From Texts from LAst Night - Too right for this thread


(336):
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear



#99 mikewof

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:05 PM

Is legalle in RI fore them gette marriede? :)


By the time their pretty little wives with their tasteful sundresses and ponytails have ripped the souls, hopes, dreams and ambitions from their lifeless frames they're going to wish they had taken that route.

#100 dde

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Posted 12 April 2012 - 04:09 PM

Enjoy it all while it lasts boys, one little ring and two little words are on both of your horizons, and they're going to roll over you both like a shitdozer in a shitblizzard.


No kidding. What I've been doing lately is checking out girl's mothers. No better way to see what you're getting into then how the Mom looks.




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