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Keels, Keels Everywhere


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#1 Dawg Gonit

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:07 AM

Keels Keels everywhere and not a boat in sight..............things that make you go HHHMMMMM. Actually if you want too you can read the article that went with this photo.

Prizes

1. An APS t-shirt, a Musto backpack, and a VOR Musto Hat.
2. A Musto backpack and a VOR Musto Hat
3. A Musto backpack and a VOR Musto Hat

Winners:
Thanks to our friends at Annapolis Performance Sailing for providing some great prizes for this one. Nearly 300 of you played along and for that we say thanks!

3rd Place- "See I told you we shouldn't leave the boats in Detroit." Swestervelt

2nd Place- "A sadly misinformed French team arrives at Keil Week in Germany." Bedford

1st Place- "AP Reports: Keels on Strike, massive picket line outside Farr and VOR headquarters demanding safe working conditions for Keel union members and members of the local Ram union." The Condor

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#2 EWS

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:23 AM

Is that Tom Schock's backyard? or Schock's version of Area 51...........

#3 macca

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:26 AM

Stonehenge??? or Keelhenge?

#4 thatbarguy

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:26 AM

Bravaria Match testing ground?

#5 Terrorvision

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:34 AM

The new Clipper fleet gets off to a solid start.

#6 Geronimo

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:50 AM

Which god damn hurricane came through now??

#7 bowgeezer

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:52 AM

Yes Mr. Farr....
Thats' what I'm ordering..a sixpack of keels...no it doesn't matter what they are made of..there's a good chance we are going to lose a few of them before this whole thing is over..I don't know who's paying for them...heck send the damn bill to Walt or Mickey...

#8 SeaWay

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:54 AM

In order to ensure that at least one RTW race finishes without further keel issues, "Proven Technology" Clipper keels were readied for shipment to Rio for retrofitting on the VO70 fleet.

EDIT - Bowgeezer and I must have had a paralell though process and pressed send at the same time.....

#9 The Condor

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Posted 20 March 2006 - 03:56 AM

AP Reports: Keels on Strike,
Massive picket line outside Farr and VOR headquarters demanding safe working conditions for Keel union members and members of the local Ram union.

#10 trimmer

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:11 AM

Someone took mine already (Keel Henge).... How bout Lead Henge....

#11 Bowgirl

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:15 AM

Ladies and Gentlemen, the unveiling of my latest invention - the Invisiboat!

#12 Turkey Slapper

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:24 AM

The Farr designed pool fence.

#13 kiwi4shore

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:24 AM

The local harbour board is mystified by these objects raised from the harbour bottom in the annual clean up drive.When questioned an official said on behalf of the harbour board that perhaps these obstructions go some way towards explaining the recent rash of sailboats overturning,and perhaps the boats have been hitting these obstructions and losing their keels in the collision.

#14 bowdude1

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:26 AM

From a Shock 40 owner... "We figured we would bring a few spares, you know, just in case"

#15 ockam-nokam

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:27 AM

How many keels kould a keel chuck chuck, if a keel chuck kould chuck keel?

#16 Town Drunk

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:28 AM

Little did they know when they lined up to be reunited with their home
that they would be left out in the cold....

#17 foredeckhell

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:30 AM

Boat Yard- $68/day
Ply wood, some 2x4's and nails- $40
New race boat- $500,000

Rembering to attach the keel corectly - priceless

#18 MT14er

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:30 AM

The new Volvo Ocean 70s are made from only the finest materials available. We have many models and colors to choose from. Only a FOOL can't see the quality and workmanship that goes into every VO70 we make. Emperor Cayard loves his, and so will you!

#19 Ross

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:33 AM

"Need a keel?? Then come to WD Schock, where we have many used keels, just waiting for you!!"

#20 Nodrog

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:46 AM

And as the tide went out after the 1st day's racing in the inaugral Bavaria Match world champs it was getting harder and harder to deny that there might be a problem.





(although Condor's got to be in the ruinnings so far)



#21 Guitar

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:48 AM

"I tell ya we're on the layline, nice puff hitting......now"

#22 middy

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:55 AM

we all lost our boats......now listed on enbay for coffee table bases

#23 Mike G

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:57 AM

Man, the line for the restroom sure is long......

#24 rtrs

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:58 AM

"…And the No. 1 Sign that the Volvo Ocean Race is in town:"

#25 sailingk8

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:58 AM

After serious concideration, it was decided that the keels were not really all that nessesary to the design.

#26 Mike G

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 03:59 AM

keel, "hi, my name is Mike, and I used to belong to a boat"
others, "HIIIII MIIIIIIKE"

#27 Christian

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:03 AM

Keelhauling - the new strongman contest

#28 Christian

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:04 AM

Damn - see what IMS does to the environment

#29 Christian

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:05 AM

The new torture site for dinghy sailors

#30 Christian

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:07 AM

Schocking..............

#31 f off

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:07 AM

The J-105's are doing what? And they think that keels will help more than replacing geriatric drivers....

#32 RC1

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:08 AM

9 Blue Keels sitting in a yard .....
Now if 9 Blue Keels should accidently fall ......

#33 Ed B

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:08 AM

Neglected slow keels awaiting a shiny orange paint job

#34 Dogfish4255

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:11 AM

The new keel in the bunch;
"Does anyone feel like we all might be here for a purpose?"

The keel in the corner;
"Another wise guy . . . we ain't got no purpose until we get us some hulls!"

The nice keel:
"Don't mind him, his casting is just a little light and chances are good he'll never make it out of here in one piece. Just keep to yourself and mind you don't get bent."

#35 DickDastardly

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:17 AM

Bavaria Yachts Spare Parts Dept.

or

What it takes to be competitive under IRC & IMS

#36 Bow Monkey

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:17 AM

The Clipper fleet left town yesterday sailing under their new upgraded IMS configuration, leaving only the unused parts behind.

#37 TCS

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:17 AM

I think I kant, I think I kant.............

#38 bunabaroo

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:20 AM

Keels Graveyard.....

#39 WORM BURNER

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:21 AM

What you would find in Larry Ellison's AC HQ

#40 bunabaroo

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:23 AM

New ultralight hulls constructed primarily from unobtainium with just a skim of paint for colour have proven difficult to attach to their keels as anything more than a gentle breeze causes them to blow away.

#41 Mr. Squirrel

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:24 AM

Typically a mother keel only gives birth to one or two keelettes, and so this is especially rare. She is hunting for their dinner, so we should probably leave before she gets back.

#42 tryst

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:41 AM

RAPTURE

#43 Sol Rosenberg

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:50 AM

"I'll take 'Fourth Mode' for a thousand, Alex."

Answer:
Posted Image


Question: "How do you keep nine Mac 26x's upright?"

#44 TXRedliner

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:51 AM

If the rain comes down
They put on their coats
Little children they're marching along
If it gets too floody
They get in their boats
Little children they're marching along

Marching along, siging a song
Making rhythm and rhyme
It used to be somthing to see
They don't keep track of the time

The Beetles

#45 gethighstayhigh

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:54 AM

Follow my lead

#46 widdlewade

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:55 AM

So many keels, so few Schocks....

#47 widdlewade

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 04:57 AM

SIMON says,"put the boat away."

#48 jegsmith

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:07 AM

Yeah, um, we lifted the Bavarias and look what happened......

#49 The Fish

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:15 AM

Schock and Farr received a group discount on their latest order...

#50 NiceyNice

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:15 AM

Dorothy: Toto, I didn't know the VOR was holding a leg in Kansas!
Toto: Umm, Dorothy, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore...
Dorothy: Hey, isn't that Paul Cayard?
Toto: Woof!


Yeah.

#51 gabespar

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:15 AM

Christo's latest installation...

#52 Wattie

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:16 AM

Keel 1 "What are you in for?"
Keel 2 "I didn't do it"
All Keels "Thats what they all say"

#53 indicative

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:18 AM

He said i was fat!

#54 Recidivist

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:21 AM

Umm, no - they don't have bolts in them. Whaddya want bolts for?

#55 donzist1

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 05:33 AM

"Future tribal Burial Ground of VOR 70 keels"

#56 wobblyLB

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 06:56 AM

...with an easy to sail to rating of 921...

#57 Speedwatch

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 07:01 AM

Blue is Farr,
Orange is faster

#58 Hannes

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 07:12 AM

My god, they left without us!

#59 ojdidit

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 07:17 AM

If you sailed a keelboat you would camouflage it too.

#60 ojdidit

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 07:19 AM

Disclaimer: Hulls dissolve in water. Proceed with caution

#61 Derek Grebe

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 07:55 AM

"Well Bob, here we are waiting for the fourth annual keel ranch Rodeo.
There are some fine heavywight steeds this year. We should see them canting
around the arena in no time"

"Yes Jim, but we are still waiting for the jockeys, clad in their offshore breathable chaps. Apparently they are still in the ready room discussing the legality of hydraulic keelriding"

"Indeed Bob, but before the main event, we should soon see the Ram parade. A fine spectacle, although some of the younger titanium rams look a little unsteady on their feet"

"you're right, Jim, but before we go to commercials, we're back to the studio for topless darts"

#62 grandsoleil

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:06 AM

Once they were swinging...
Now they don't

#63 Mid

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:08 AM

My god, they left without us!


:lol: :lol:

#64 slinky

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:21 AM

Local chapter 911 of the lost keel support group.

#65 Guest Anarchist Matsuru_*

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:30 AM

JuanK: "Maybe we can show our goodwill and send them to Farr"

#66 slinky

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:44 AM

Government Warning: Lead is a known carcinogen.

Disposal of Carcinogen Chemical Waste – liquid or dry waste
o) Dispose of carcinogen contaminated waste and solutions of carcinogens as a hazardous
waste at your building’s scheduled hazardous waste pick-up.

o) Dispose of solutions of carcinogens inside a container that can be sealed closed and
stand on its own. Label the container with a carcinogen warning label and a completed
Hazardous Waste ID Tag.

#67 sirstopher

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:50 AM

I swear to GOD I tightened the keel bolts

#68 GRUMPY

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:56 AM

I told you 5200 doesn't cure properly.....

#69 StevenRolland

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:56 AM

After re-fitting Cheyenne as a deep sea diving support vessel, Steve Fosset's Keel Recovery business is starting to show results.

#70 jocksinclair

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:57 AM

"Hello Bavaria Yachts Keel Replacement Department, how may i help you?.....Yes Sir i believe we have one of those in stock..."

#71 bad gas

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 08:57 AM

Kostecki had these flown in to test before Saturday...

#72 bad gas

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:00 AM

"We better put the Titanium Rods back On!"

#73 slinky

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:00 AM

- Gives renewed meaning to "Lead Mine"

- A Gulf Coast recycling center

#74 bad gas

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:04 AM

Movistars Shore Crew... I think Farr has finally lost their edge.. My Dad's Cal 40 has a better keel.

#75 moonstar

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:05 AM

Its close at the windward mark as the first race of the 2006 blue keel worlds begins.

#76 emo1911a1

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:06 AM

loose keels kills

#77 bad gas

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:11 AM

With no end in insight... Mr. Bush has ordered all available lead to be stockpiled for the making of cluster bombs..

#78 Ulfur

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:11 AM

Is that Keeldragers private stash ?

#79 sailor5755

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:18 AM

Movistar aren't saying anything, but we think they may still be worried about leaving Rio and have brought some extra help for the boat.

#80 George Hackett

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:20 AM

sailing instructions. all tables will be rounded to starboard.

#81 woof

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:30 AM

fins to the left
fins to the right
and not a finless
hull in sight


ww

#82 woof

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 09:43 AM

"What, paint 'em orange and they'll go faster? OK. Yeah, Bruce we know blue ones are stronger, but hey, that's the builder's decision, right?"

#83 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:00 AM

Another day on the keel farm.

#84 Covey

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:01 AM

I think we overdid it when taking weight out of the hull and onto the keel...

#85 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:03 AM

They said it was a swingers' party. I guess the leather thong is a bit much huh?

#86 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:05 AM

"They must be disposable. The bottom of San Diego harbor is littered with them."

#87 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:51 AM

Some rich fuck named Koch ordered them for his yard. He says it's "art".

#88 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:53 AM

"No Bruce, the fat part goes on the bottom."

#89 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:55 AM

"So come on down to Crazy Dennis's Used Keels! $0 Down, $0 Security Deposit!!"

#90 Struan

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:57 AM

Movistar prepare spare keels for the next time it breaks

#91 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 10:57 AM

Some assembly required.

#92 Bedford

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 11:08 AM

A sadly misinformed French team arrives at Keil Week in Germany.

#93 Mid

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 11:10 AM

Some assembly required.


mate , you gotta relax more

:lol: :lol: :lol:

#94 Bowgirl

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 11:13 AM

It's Spring! I swear it is. Look. It's sprouting keels! A whole field of them!!


OR

Knock knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad you know where YOUR keel is?

#95 Breitling

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 11:43 AM

The new 2006 Farr paperweight Christmas gift. Cufflinks coming soon.

#96 Phil

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 11:56 AM

I'm telling you once more and that is a fact

THE FT10 IS A CENTERBOARDER,NOW GO HOME.

#97 stuj

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 12:07 PM

"The Keeling fields"


If i buy another boat my wife will send me there!!!

#98 sails call

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 12:21 PM

Thank God we bought the Premium Spare Parts Kit.

#99 StevenRolland

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 12:24 PM

Low tide after the latest VOR in-port race.

#100 entropy

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Posted 21 March 2006 - 12:27 PM

The rule states that 100% of weight saved in the hull and deck can go in the keel




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