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Lilly

Member Since 24 Sep 2006
Offline Last Active Aug 14 2016 03:08 AM
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Topics I've Started

Sarah Silverman reminds us that #EverySpermIsSacred

25 May 2016 - 05:47 PM

Republican legislators all over the country are obsessed with legislating women’s innards – specifically, reproductive innards. Whether it’s forcing doctors to perform unnecessary transvaginal ultrasound probes (government mandated rape) before legal abortions, the Republican war on contraception, or forcing women to carry a dead fetus to term, the GOP has proven their real agenda is controlling women; and they’re getting away with it by calling it religious freedom.

Since we defend the right to enact laws that makes it difficult for women to terminate unwanted pregnancies, shouldn’t we also legislate male masturbation?

Here’s something that I learned that is fascinating, and it’s this: Scientists have found that sperms cells smell,” Silverman said. “Like I know sperm smells, but sperm cells have the sense of smell, and you know what that means: Sperm is life. And you know what that means: We’ve gotta legislate that shit.


What we’ll do is — it’s a real simple procedure. We take a really long needle – like basically put a  GoPro camera down your penis hole, urethra … then down into your testicular sack. We’re going to show you the ultrasound, so you can see the life in your balls.

She explained the procedure would help save some of those innocent sperm from the men who recklessly murder them with their bare hands, and added “You would not believe the amount of men that do not want to jerk off after that.


I Got My Pussy Stoned with Weed Lube

25 May 2016 - 01:23 AM

A new product category maybe?
 
http://www.vice.com/...h-weed-lube-909
 
E6C0ADB7-1B69-4184-B2D5-3DCE092E8A62-jpg
 

The first night my boyfriend and I banged with Foria, I was already stoned, so everything felt great. He ate me out and got stoned from licking the stuff off me, and it was killer. However, we have a healthy sex life, and I have never had trouble orgasming. My trouble was with pot itself.

I decided to dose my vagina with Foria religiously for a week.

Every morning I gave it four sprays and again in the mid afternoon. My boyfriend and I had a lot of sex and monitored how things were changing, if they even were. Sex was intense. I noticed certain things felt different and orgasms were longer, way crazier, and felt enhanced. When we were just banging the old-fashioned way, I felt it all over in a more focused sense, like everything was working outwards from my stoned little cunt. I mean, without sounding too granola here, it was pretty good, and I don’t know whether that was the mixture of the Foria between my legs and my mouth.

As the days went on, other weird things happened. When I was hiking up in the Hollywood trails and doing sprints with my pal who was helping me get in shape, I suddenly (in the middle of my brutal, exhausting, gross work-out) noticed my vagina getting all riled up. My body was in disgusting pain, and my genitals felt totally turned on. It was nuts.