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Jason AUS

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Posts posted by Jason AUS

  1.  

    There will always be exceptions, look at Shockwave right now. And I will "ruin" this thread any way I like. I fucking started it. Good day sir.

    Where did Shockwave finish in last year's Worlds? Oh look she came third!

    Didn't Shockwave beat Bella Mente on line and handicap to win this year's Bermuda race? That's a pretty cool exception IMHO.

  2.  

     

    Poor bastards. I did wonder how you "lose" a 777 in this day and age with all the tech we have.

    No ATC radar coverage on "Oceanic" flights one outside of the range of coastal radars. Separation is by altitude and schedule. TCAS warning if two aircraft get close.

     

    Fake passports may or may not be a factor.

     

    At that point in the flight, Otto is driving and things are pretty relaxed. Unless in turbulence or other unusual flight conditions, the first crew. Response is likely to be WTF? First thing that occurs when something bad happens is the crew deals with the issue. Making a mayday call comes later. Given the limits of VHF radios, good chance that you won't be heard anyway.

     

    Nothing oceanic on that route.

     

    I was thinking mainly along the line of PLB's that we use during ocean races. Surely for something as expensive as an aircraft they'd have a "holy fuck, our wing just fell off, it's a catastrophic failure, may God have mercy on us" big red button you'd hit as a last resort if you can't regain control of the aircraft. Obviously that's no use if you explode due to bombs etc. but surely if you begin a massive descent from 35,000 feet there would be something?

  3. By today's standards none of us was supposed to ever make it.

    HIGH
    SCHOOL -- 1968 vs. 2012

    Scenario 1:

    Jack
    goes duck hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.

    1968 -
    Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

    2012 -
    School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

    Scenario 2:

    Johnny
    and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

    1968 -
    Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

    2012 -
    Police called and SWAT team arrives -- they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it
    .

    Scenario 3:

    Jeffrey
    will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.

    1968 -
    Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

    2012 -
    Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He
    becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The family gets extra money (SSI) from the government because Jeffrey has a disability.

    Scenario 4:

    Billy
    breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

    1968 -
    Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.

    2012 -
    Billy's dad is
    arrested for child abuse
    ,
    Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair
    w
    ith the psychologist.

    Scenario 5:

    Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

    1968 -
    Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock
    .

    2012 -
    The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His
    car is then searched for drugs and weapons.

    Scenario 6:

    Pedro fails high school English.

    1968 -
    Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

    2012 -
    Pedro's cause is taken up by state.
    Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for
    graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

    Scenario 7:

    Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.

    1968 -
    Ants die.

    2012
    -
    ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates his parents - and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

    Scenario 8:

    Johnny
    falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee
    .
    He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

    1968
    In
    a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

    2012 -
    Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her
    job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5
    years of therapy.

    How stupid
    have we become!

     

    Hey, take it to political anarchy! This shit doesn't belong in a Joke thread :(

     

    It depends.... is Johnny's teacher Mary a hottie?

  4. HOW TO TELL IF YOU'RE A SECRET REDNECK JEDI

     

    If you hear . . . "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle..."

     

    If you ever said the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

     

    Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

     

    You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

     

    At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

     

    You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

     

    You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

     

    The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

     

    Wookiees are offended by your B.O.

     

    You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

     

    You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.

     

    You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light up.

     

    You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

     

    You ever fantasized about Princess Leia wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

     

    You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

     

    Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

     

    You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

     

    You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood deck.

     

    You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

     

    Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side...it'll be a hoot."

  5. The Ferrari Formula 1 Team fired their entire Pit Crew yesterday.

     

    The announcement followed Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the Australian Government's Work for the Dole Scheme and hire unemployed Aboriginal youths.

     

    The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how Aboriginal youths were able to remove a set of car wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew can only do it in 8 seconds using millions of dollars of hi-tech equipment.

     

    This was thought to be an excellent yet bold move by Ferrari Management. As most races are won or lost in the Pits, Ferrari would have an advantage over every other Team. However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for as, during the Aboriginals first practice session, not only were the Crew able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had re-sprayed, re-badged and sold the vehicle to the McLaren Team for 6 dozen cans of VB, a carton of Winfield Blue and a quick glimpse of Lewis Hamilton's bird in the shower.

     

    Authorities are hence re-evaluating the scheme.

  6. There is a Winter Pennant race out of the Derwent Sailing squadron (DSS) on Sunday morning. Div1 start probably 9:30 or thereabouts... I am not doing the DSS Winter Series otherwise I'd offer you a ride... but you are welcome to come on board and help sand bulkheads! Otherwise, I don't doubt someone will put up their hand to offer you a spot.

     

    What an offer!

    I think if I put that to the girl she'd ask why I don't show as much interest in the walls at home that require sanding and painting...

     

    :lol:

  7. Hey chaps, flying in on Friday for a cheeky w/end with the missus, is there any yachting on or has the winter season ended? If so, wouldn't mind a sail if anyone knows of boats short of crew?

     

    She's done a couple of Hobart races and some other bits n bobs, and I've seen a boat. Once. In a book.

     

    :P

     

    PM me?

     

    J

  8. While we're discussing fast 40'ers, does anyone know what happened to Bob Steel's old N/M 46 "Quest" ?

     

    I know she went to Tassie, and after JB died she went to QLD, did one Southport race (06) and disappeared? That was one motherf*cking fast boat...

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