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Heaven can wait

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About Heaven can wait

  • Rank
    Super Anarchist
  • Birthday 04/05/1968

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  • Location
    Lake Macquarie, Australia

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  1. Being diagnosed with Cancer is a bit like the start of an Offshore Yacht Race, you run around filled with adrenalin, can I do this, am I going to make it, and as you sail into the darkness of reality, the only difference is for the weary Sailer, the Sun will rise in the morning.

  2. happy birthday!!!!!

  3. Now 84 Dead and over 700 homes lost. A black day for Victoria and indeed for all Australia, just terrible what has happened. God speed Victoria - we're all thinking of you.
  4. Most excellent Kris, this little boat of yours came up a while ago and aroused interest then. I love it and believe you've got yourself a little winner there. See here. Original Proto 18 thread (Clicky)
  5. Is this the same boat as the "Proto 18"???
  6. Mildred and Earl Mildred, 93, was despondent over the Recent death of her husband Earl, So she decided to just kill herself And join him in death. Thinking it would be best to get it Over with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to Shoot herself in the heart since it was So badly broken in the first place. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become A vegetable and a burden to someone, she called Her doctor's office to learn her heart's exact location. "Since you're a woman," The doctor said, "your heart is just belo
  7. A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live." Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last oper
  8. A Blonde Joke Three Blondes were all applying for the last available position in the Homicide Detective Unit. The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, "So y'all want to be cops, huh? The blondes all nodded. The detective got up, opened a file drawer and pulled out a folder. Sitting back down, he opened it and pulled out a picture, and said, "To be a detective, you have to be able to detect. You must be able to notice things such as distinguishing features and oddities, such as scars and so forth." So saying, he stuck the photo in th
  9. Lost in Bunnings Hardware Two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around Bunnings Hardware when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, And I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." The young guy says, "That's a coincidence, I'm looking for my wife too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate." The old guy says, "Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife Look like?" The young guy says, "Well, she is 24 yrs old, tall, with blond
  10. There I was sitting there thinking what is that boat parked beside Skandia????............................................................... ah it's still Skandia......... Dooooaaaah. Time for another beer me thinks. Cheers.
  11. How about another Blond Joke. A young ventriloquist was touring the clubs; one night he was doing a show in a small town near NSW. With his dummy on his knee, he started going through his usual dumb blonde jokes. Suddenly, a blonde in the 4th row stood up on her chair and shouted, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What's the color of a person's hair got to do with her intelligence and worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community, and from reac
  12. Why we forward Jokes. A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them. After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pear
  13. Broke Back Girl A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked hard
  14. Irish doctor A Doctor wanted to get off work and play golf, so he approached his Irish assistant Paddy., "I am going golfing tomorrow Paddy and I don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients" "Yes, sir!" answers Paddy. The doctor goes off to golf and returns the following day and asks: So, Paddy, how was your day? Paddy told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so I gave him Panadol." "Bravo Mate and the second one?" asks the doctor. "The second one had stomach burning and I gave him
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