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The Australian Sailing and RQYS Kabuki Theatre Thread


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Discombobulating. The delivery was a nice last sail though, two sail bagged out to the point of big luff bubbles, 10-11 knots effortless and overhauling everything we could see. Still makes me smile.

We use it for social distancing.

Fark , cryptic alright ! . Do you guys yell starboard up there ?  or some cryptic innuendo that takes so fracking long that you run into the catamaran anyway ....this thread makes me want to throw a c

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12 hours ago, Livia said:

Don’t apologise 

I was saying lucky you

You are still enjoying going sailing.

I wish. No sailing (or anything else for that matter) in the Peoples Republic of Sicktoria

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3 hours ago, Last Post said:

Surely this thread needs to be re-titled - Australian Sailing and RQYS Bukkake Theatre?

Is there an Enigma decoder or app available that’ll allow those not in the know to translate the content so it can be understood? 

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On 9/6/2020 at 5:30 PM, (p)Irate said:

I was told today that RQYS sent an email to the Tasmanian owner of the above Melges 32 ordering him to remove the Envy Scooters signage from the boom because the new name of the boat brought the RQYS into disrepute. YCMTSU

This explains everything really.

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On 9/6/2020 at 5:30 PM, (p)Irate said:

I was told today that RQYS sent an email to the Tasmanian owner of the above Melges 32 ordering him to remove the Envy Scooters signage from the boom because the new name of the boat brought the RQYS into even further disrepute. YCMTSU

FIFY.

Considering he's the third owner of that boat since it left RQ, I hope he told them where to shove their "Order"

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On 9/6/2020 at 5:30 PM, (p)Irate said:

I was told today that RQYS sent an email to the Tasmanian owner of the above Melges 32 ordering him to remove the Envy Scooters signage from the boom because the new name of the boat brought the RQYS into disrepute. YCMTSU

 

2 hours ago, MelbourneA31 said:

It's hardly the same.

He is fair game because of above.

he should have removed the signage when he sold it to the Melbourne owner.

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10 hours ago, TheUltimateSockPuppet said:

You love being cryptic!

Fark , cryptic alright ! . Do you guys yell starboard up there ?  or some cryptic innuendo that takes so fracking long that you run into the catamaran anyway ....this thread makes me want to throw a chair at my ex missus and vandalise my Mates boat . Then I might tell the committee to get fucked and go racing anyway with my mate who got booted out , tell them to get fucked a second time then every one spends  6 months writing cryptic shit ....what did I miss ? 

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26 minutes ago, 44forty said:

Fark , cryptic alright ! . Do you guys yell starboard up there ?  or some cryptic innuendo that takes so fracking long that you run into the catamaran anyway ....this thread makes me want to throw a chair at my ex missus and vandalise my Mates boat . Then I might tell the committee to get fucked and go racing anyway with my mate who got booted out , tell them to get fucked a second time then every one spends  6 months writing cryptic shit ....what did I miss ? 

Nothing! Except you have to be on Port to get exonerated

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8 hours ago, 44forty said:

Fark , cryptic alright ! . Do you guys yell starboard up there ?  or some cryptic innuendo that takes so fracking long that you run into the catamaran anyway ....this thread makes me want to throw a chair at my ex missus and vandalise my Mates boat . Then I might tell the committee to get fucked and go racing anyway with my mate who got booted out , tell them to get fucked a second time then every one spends  6 months writing cryptic shit ....what did I miss ? 

................. can I not be your mate for that particular exercise? TIA   :P

.. and anyway I heard there was a guy at Kissing Point that was...........

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34 minutes ago, wal' said:

................. can I not be your mate for that particular exercise? TIA   :P

.. and anyway I heard there was a guy at Kissing Point that was...........

Yeah mate you can be in the cat and I will take RJ ! 

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46 minutes ago, wal' said:

and anyway I heard there was a guy at Kissing Point that was...........

Yeah a certain spanner turner with an establishment up a muddy inlet told a wig wearing wordsmith that a bob Dylan lookalike was spotted making off with one of the club dish brushes . Word is they are all lawyering up , so watch this space ....someone with a red Holden will be bankrupt by years end 

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4 minutes ago, 44forty said:

Yeah a certain spanner turner with an establishment up a muddy inlet told a wig wearing wordsmith that a bob Dylan lookalike was spotted making off with one of the club dish brushes . Word is they are all lawyering up , so watch this space ....someone with a red Holden will be bankrupt by years end 

Now that is cryptic!

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1 hour ago, 44forty said:

Yeah a certain spanner turner with an establishment up a muddy inlet told a wig wearing wordsmith that a bob Dylan lookalike was spotted making off with one of the club dish brushes . Word is they are all lawyering up , so watch this space ....someone with a red Holden will be bankrupt by years end 

What is it about clubs these days that everyone is lawyering up? What happened to the good old days when as a 15 year old the old timers would take you under their wing and teach you the important aspects of sailing like how to polish off a long neck on the downwind and then smash it over the side with the winch handle before calling mast abeam on the boat to leeward?

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Nah,  where I learned we didn't carry glass.

But an important part of the learning process was how many holes to put in the bottom of the steel beer cans with Bobby to make them sink quickly.

(For the uneducated Bobby Simpson was a great first batsman, (or opener), for the Aussie cricket team).

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Where I learned we carried glass.... and a bag of corks. Drain a long neck of its original contents then hike over the side and refill with Eau de Waitemata and bung a cork in it. Ballast ratio remains unchanged, can't be fairer than that?

The original water ballast system as used in the mid 60's on the Mulleties in Auckland

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That sort of leak is not far away from me - I got an email the other day that had all 450 odd email addresses of the recipients in the "To" address part of the email.

 

Just names and emails, but still...

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On 9/10/2020 at 1:15 PM, SCANAS said:

I just got off the phone to my accountant. He’s run the numbers again & assures me I am not the billionaire in the leaked email. 

I just had a guy ring me wanting to know if I was interested in buying an investment property in the Ukraine...fuck knows how he got my number.

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5 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

I just had a guy ring me wanting to know if I was interested in buying an investment property in the Ukraine...fuck knows how he got my number.

It was probably Wayne winding you up 

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6 hours ago, jack_sparrow said:

I just had a guy ring me wanting to know if I was interested in buying an investment property in the Ukraine...fuck knows how he got my number.

Hunter Biden tells me it has lovely sunrises over the gas fields in Autumn. 

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On 9/12/2020 at 12:40 AM, jack_sparrow said:

Anyone else get this email? I wonder how they got my address?

Hello Mr Royal Yachting Man of Queensland. My name is Captain Whotta Faarkup of the Royal Yacht club of Mogadishu. My Uncle , exiled Commadore Allclubsare Fullofcunts has US $800 million of the club's cash hidden from the rebels and with your help we can move it out of Somalia. For this you will receive half of the amount. All we need is your bank details (we already have your email, home and mobile phone numbers)

I thank you for your help in advance and remind you we know were you live have all other information we require to make this happen. The members of the RYCM will forever be in your debt.

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And another...

Hello Queensland Royal man, you look very sexy man in your sailing suit in photos from opening up day. I am Gracie Grape-nips and next time you come Hong Kong I show you very good time. I have many other Royal Queen sailing men who are my special friends like Lord Ian from Kellett Island boxing club. I give discount for senior members and no rush. Give Gracie call or email next time you come. Gracie love you long time.

Gosh.

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“The spreadsheet included the private personal details of millionaires, prominent barristers, solicitors and wealthy business people. Some members whose personal details were revealed included Queenslanders who have received honours awards.” Courier Mail 

... Thankfully none of which are interested in purchasing pirated DVD’s from a Balinese bloke on eBay. 

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1 hour ago, LB 15 said:

And another...

Hello Queensland Royal man, you look very sexy man in your sailing suit in photos from opening up day. I am Gracie Grape-nips and next time you come Hong Kong I show you very good time. I have many other Royal Queen sailing men who are my special friends like Lord Ian from Kellett Island boxing club. I give discount for senior members and no rush. Give Gracie call or email next time you come. Gracie love you long time.

Gosh.

Ah you can get Happy Ending

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  • 2 weeks later...
2 hours ago, Livia said:

Poor broker, bad ju-ju there!

Still an excellent boat though.  Def one of the fastest and best set up offshore capable TP 52s in the country.  The broker will likely be very busy, for a short while!

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17 minutes ago, Recidivist said:

Still an excellent boat though.  Def one of the fastest and best set up offshore capable TP 52s in the country.  The broker will likely be very busy, for a short while!

To race where exactly!

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14 minutes ago, Gorn FRANTIC!! said:

I thought SMB was one of the newer Beau Geste boats but upon closer inspection it is not.

The one that’s for sale SMB is 2009 according to the listing. Looks like Karl had one built new in 2015? Raced at Hamo but is it still in Oz & is it a TP? 
... “The rig is taller than a standard TP52 and the boom is lower. With a high potential for sail area and a deeper fin” 

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On 8/13/2020 at 10:33 PM, jack_sparrow said:

From the Australian Sailing thread on AGM

Heard through the vine people have been recieving cryptic messages referencing obscure club rules/conventions. Probably just a coincidence same persons have been asking questions post AGM. :ph34r:

Icebergs on their way to the surface are usually pretty fucking hard to hold down. :lol: 

IMG_20200813_222024.jpg.8e12f1b7601debc30521243fa1e85875.jpgIMG_20200813_222214.jpg.e2706855fe1f57a183e4e7c99940b401.jpgIMG_20200813_222343.jpg.f18f1d9d2fc5670223d8e86047b992a6.jpgIMG_20200813_224234.jpg.ea86b1e2597ec30ecdfd95ac9c995e5a.jpg

 

Seems 1/2 yearly charges for berth holders went up by 30% today.

Apparently the marina has been losing money even with Covid rent relief.

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1 hour ago, TheUltimateSockPuppet said:

Which also means the value of each berth will probably go down too.

Can't go down from zero!

There just a liability until 2041.

So 592 members keep the whole place going and pay for poor administration.

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On 9/6/2020 at 5:30 PM, (p)Irate said:

I was told today that RQYS sent an email to the Tasmanian owner of the above Melges 32 ordering him to remove the Envy Scooters signage from the boom because the new name of the boat brought the RQYS into disrepute. YCMTSU

Noticed yesterday that the said M32 has a new paint job. No name on the sides. Trump is gone, replaced by advertising for the owner's business. Envy Scooters website gone from the boom. Still sailing under the name Cockwomble which still appears on the transom.

The power of the RQ threatening letter or an opportunity to promote his own business rather than one promoted by the other cockwomble?

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On 10/3/2020 at 11:54 AM, TheUltimateSockPuppet said:

Someone's been asleep at the wheel for some time!

Only 3 seasons entries raced in the keelboats on the weekend.

All pretty irrelevant  as a sailing club now.

Let the next marina shitfight begin.

Sounds like a few well heeled older owner members have had enough of getting shit upon with their berth leases.

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On 10/2/2020 at 9:43 AM, TheUltimateSockPuppet said:

So is it true that the Sailing Manager at RQYS reports to the Marina Manager?

Makes sense. They are all boaty stuff. Frees up staff for the more important operations of the Corporation. It is a a big business now not a club remember. Except during a pandemic. Then it becomes a sailing club again that all members should ask what they can do to help. But that is the only questions permitted.

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Another success for Australian Sailing in Queensland.

Seems every keelboat club except one is going with AMS.

Already more AMS applications than IRC issued.

And the odd one out has the smallest keelboat fleet anyway.

So sad.

 

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1 hour ago, Livia said:

Another success for Australian Sailing in Queensland.

Seems every keelboat club except one is going with AMS.

Already more AMS applications than IRC issued.

And the odd one out has the smallest keelboat fleet anyway.

So sad.

 

Funny as AMS dominated Melbourne seems to have many clubs seriously toying with ORCc

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