Jump to content

Truth or Dare (kinda). How did your last big brawl/bar fight end?....


Recommended Posts

I thought I was doing pretty well when some whinny-ass kid in Brennan's Pub in Manhattan Beach took a swing at me after I told him that 'Yes, if your fiance suddenly stopped taking your phone calls...then she's either dead.....or she's banging someone else'. He ended up on the floor with my bar stool pinned over his chest and I figured that was that. I let him up a bit later, finished my drink, paid my bill, grabbed my shit and headed to the front door. 

That's when my own bar stool came flying back with a vengeance and almost broke my back. I was 31 at the time....and quickly realized then & there that I either needed to be a bit nicier? Or just avoid bars all together....:lol:

  • Like 1
  • Downvote 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

So was that the end of it?  You and the barstool went through the door into the morning light?

I think you are holding back on the story.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Already mentioned it. On liberty in Hong Kong. Limeys in as well. Same bar. A couple smart ass remarks and it off to the races with everybody in the bar. Shore Patrol showed up. Not sure you could claim a win on either side. The Skipper was not happy. Next day some number of us ran into some number of them at the local athletic field but we were all sober and a rugby game broke out. That hurt a lot worse than the bar escapade. 1971 ish.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Last big bar fight I was in was in T'under Bay in the 70's.   We had to end our set early when it broke out.  I stood behind the stage watching the fisticuffs while the roadies stood in front of the speaker columns trying to fend off the grappling participants.  

Who the fuck gets in bar fights?   Tough guys?   Smart people know how to avoid that shit.  

We've evolved a bit from here:

How did it end?  The cops showed up, dragged the participants off to the drunk tank to sober up.  Next afternoon they were back in the bar, all friends, pounding back the shit beer from the 70's again.  Rinse the beer and blood off the floor and repeat.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, Rain Man said:

Who the fuck gets in bar fights?   Tough guys?   Smart people know how to avoid that shit.  

Generally......very young testosterone filled males......oh and way too much alcohol on board helps as well. 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

won me last one by 100 yards , will win the next by hundred n ten .

 

 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

I've never been in a bar fight. The one time some drunk fool wanted to take me on (I have no idea why), I calmly told him that if he didn't go away immediately he would end up with permanent brain damage and unable to have children. I'm a little guy, but he believed me...........

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Never got involved with such a thing,  saw a couple while I was training in the RAF, in the nearby towns bars.

I and most other military men also left rapidly.. We'd no wish to get rounded up by the civilian police , get arrested by them. Then get get arrested by the RAF for bringing them into disrepute. It definitely would be a bad start to a career...

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

This may come as a shock but I've been in quite a few bar fights. The last one was 5 years ago. I was heroic in defeat but there were just two punches thrown; alas, just one landed. But both serious elements were involved: booze and a babe. The antagonist was 30 years my junior and a brick mason. My prime, like the British Empire, has seen the setting sun. 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

At 6'4 and 240 with a low key demeanor, I was never in one. Until I met SWMBO and she was the bar manager at the local hot spot club. I worked as a bouncer for 2 years while we were dating. That was a great education into why drinking to excess in public is a bad idea and why drunk people make terrible fighters.

Best fight was a bar brawl with the Bouncers and about 6 members of a hispanic gang from the other side of the state that came over looking to kill a rival gang member. They did not take kindly to being asked to leave after trying to start several fights. The apparent leader got in my face (well, tried to. He was about 5'4) and in the middle of screaming at me about all the ways he was going to do in me and dig up my ancestors and kill them again, punched the bouncer standing next me (he was about 6' and 180). One of his buddies actually climbed up on a railing and leaped onto me like he'd seen too many movies. I just accelerated his descent into the ground. 

We dragged/walked them out the big wooden double doors and pitched them into the streets. I stayed at the doors to make sure they were leaving and then headed back in. Big mistake, As I was walking back to the rest of the bouncers they started running towards me. I spun around and we met 4 guys with knives out.

Shortly after the local PD arrived and 2 went straight to jail and two went to the hospital and then to jail.

Stupid Fukers (and me too for ever turning my back on them)

 

Only time in my life I've ever gone after somebody without being in complete control of my emotions. One of the bouncers was a good friend and got the boots put to his head when he went down. I didn't take it well.

 

WL

Link to post
Share on other sites

out with a few friends in a small town in washington state making the rounds, one of the boys picks up and disappears with this girl who had been there with a fellow. mate and i move along to the last pub on the way home for one last one. said fellow catches up with us. we are sitting down, enjoying a pint. fellow recognizes us and in a very flustered fashion rushes over to us and demands to know 'where his fucking girl and our friend was or he would kick our heads in.' i looked at him, all 5'4" of him, and said 'she was probably getting plowed behind the dumpster by out friend.' i stood up at 6' 200, and my mate stood up at 6'2' 220. that was the end of that, and the closest i have ever been to a serious fight. im normally smart enough to avoid them.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, Happy said:

I've never been in a bar fight. The one time some drunk fool wanted to take me on (I have no idea why), I calmly told him that if he didn't go away immediately he would end up with permanent brain damage and unable to have children. I'm a little guy, but he believed me...........

 

7 hours ago, Ease the sheet. said:

I'm married. There's no reason to go to bars.

 

 

Actually there still is, I enjoy the serenity.

 

2 hours ago, The Q said:

Never got involved with such a thing,  saw a couple while I was training in the RAF, in the nearby towns bars.

I and most other military men also left rapidly.. We'd no wish to get rounded up by the civilian police , get arrested by them. Then get get arrested by the RAF for bringing them into disrepute. It definitely would be a bad start to a career...

I worked behind many bars for a few years, a few rough ones. maybe saw 4-5 fights the bouncers either sorted fast or escalated when they were bored. Mostly us barmaids sorted the trouble.

I think it's mostly an American thing.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I’ve only been on the rescue end of a bar fight a couple of times. There’s always some big, dumb asshole that wants to beat someone up. My friend went outside to an alley for a smoke a long time ago and I saw someone go out the door a minute later with a bad look on his face. I had a strange feeling about it so I went out to find my friend’s face is being used to scrape the stucco off the side of the building. I saw his bloodied face and went bezerk. When I was done with the thug, I’m sure he never lifted a finger in anger for the rest of his life if he even survived. I held him by the throat and must have hit him a hundred times in his right ear until he went to sleep. You don’t want to mess with a small Lefty who was taught to fight, not lose. 
 

A couple of other interesting situations as well, and have always won, but I was lucky/trained enough to have never actually been hit by a punch or kick, drunk people have terrible response times. If their fists could only work as fast as their mouths...that said, I hate violence and have never instigated a fight.

 

As Meli says, it’s mostly an American thing, I guess:blink:

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Wasn't really much of a fight. First date with my now wife along with my friend and her friend who were dating at the time. We were in a nightclub in DC, this would have been just over three decades ago now. There was a guy pointing what I took to be a fake gun at my friend, who took off the second he saw it with the girls following after him. I followed behind, but still convinced this was a guy my size (short) with a fake gun just trying to intimidate my buddy. I head back in, after promising my now wife it was just to get my jacket, but with the intention of confronting the guy. Well I did manage to confront him, but soon realized that my judgement with regards to his size (he was more like 6'2") and the fakeness of his gun (it was real) were both incorrect. The hammer from the pistol managed to fully puncture my cheek when he pistol whipped me with it. I spent 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding so my date would not realize I had done something stupid. That did not work either, which was evident when my date stopped speaking English and would only yell at me in Spanish when I got back outside. The girls flagged down a couple cops who stopped the guy with the gun coming out of the club, they took his gun talked to him for a few minutes, gave the gun back to him, then came back to us and explained he is a cop and we should get out of DC immediately. We did, and thankfully my now wife forgave me for my stupidity. I have also kept my promise to not be so stupid again. 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

Was uninvolved standing between some girls in an effort to shield them and the fight started by a acquaintance with short man's disease when I was struck across the back by a pool cue. It did not break like in the movies and the bruise/welt wept blood for a week, and remained visible for a month. I then became involved in actively leaving the bar. This may or may not have been the last time I entered a public bar. (defined as an establishment that only serves drinks or not part of a members only club)

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, The Q said:

Never got involved with such a thing,  saw a couple while I was training in the RAF, in the nearby towns bars.

I and most other military men also left rapidly.. We'd no wish to get rounded up by the civilian police , get arrested by them. Then get get arrested by the RAF for bringing them into disrepute. It definitely would be a bad start to a career...

A/Force Son #1 is getting transferred from Langley to England in a couple months. I should send him your post....:lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites
30 minutes ago, LenP said:

Wasn't really much of a fight. First date with my now wife along with my friend and her friend who were dating at the time. We were in a nightclub in DC, this would have been just over three decades ago now. There was a guy pointing what I took to be a fake gun at my friend, who took off the second he saw it with the girls following after him. I followed behind, but still convinced this was a guy my size (short) with a fake gun just trying to intimidate my buddy. I head back in, after promising my now wife it was just to get my jacket, but with the intention of confronting the guy. Well I did manage to confront him, but soon realized that my judgement with regards to his size (he was more like 6'2") and the fakeness of his gun (it was real) were both incorrect. The hammer from the pistol managed to fully puncture my cheek when he pistol whipped me with it. I spent 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding so my date would not realize I had done something stupid. That did not work either, which was evident when my date stopped speaking English and would only yell at me in Spanish when I got back outside. The girls flagged down a couple cops who stopped the guy with the gun coming out of the club, they took his gun talked to him for a few minutes, gave the gun back to him, then came back to us and explained he is a cop and we should get out of DC immediately. We did, and thankfully my now wife forgave me for my stupidity. I have also kept my promise to not be so stupid again. 

Contest over....you win.......:lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Enticed by the promise of cheap beer and cheaper chicks, we went into our local college dive bar.  We weren't more than a couple of minutes into our first beers when the shit started by the pool tables.  Looked like a bunch of gang bangers against a bunch of hardhats. I won my first and only bar fight by manfully running away. 

The beer sucked anyway.   

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

I've really only stopped bar fights. I've watched quite a few.

 The best non-bar fight I ever saw was when some big, dumb tattooed guy came in to the local bar and started mouthing off. He was looking for a particular guy, (who was there, quietly drinking a pint of Guinness)

Dumb guy finds out where Cliffy is, and walks up to him. Smacks Cliffy on the back of the head. "I hear you're a bad ass, that can kick anyone's ass" (True)

 Cliffy keeps cool, takes another drink off his pint and quietly tells the guy to please leave him alone. He's just trying to have a few drinks after work, and doesn't want any trouble.

 Big dumb guy turns around and starts chanting at the rest of the patrons "Such a fuckin' tough guy! I see now he's just a pussy!"

 He turns back, and shoves Cliffy's back.

 Cliffy asks the guy to leave him alone.

 Tough guy goes to shove Cliffy again, but Cliffy's right arm goes straight up and back, and his fist connects with tough guys face. Never even turned around.

 Before the tough guy even hit the floor Cliffy was taking another drink. The bar tender brought him another on the house, and a couple of other guys dragged tough guy out to the parking lot. (Never to be seen again)

 Cliffy says: "Some guys just can't take a hint, can they?"

 BTW. Cliffy was a clam and oyster fisherman, who'd also worked as a stone mason. He was a 5th degree (or something like that) Black belt Tae Kwon Do guy, who also worked as a boat Capt. for the Dept. of Homeland Security.

 One of the most peaceful, funniest guys you could ever hope to meet.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I've seen literally hundreds of bar fights ranging from hilarious to horrible during a lifetime of playing bar gigs. I particularly remember this one.

A local called Tim was a youngish fellow in a wheelchair (ex-bike racer) who liked to get on the dance floor and wheelie around with his girl. One night another wheelchair-bound drunk dude was in the bar, kept trying to muscle in on Tim's girl. 

They ended up toe to toe swinging at each other. The bouncer strolled over and wheeled the angry guy out the door while he continued flailing away at air.

 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Im a modest, humble guy, so I will be brief. Mine were all on camera in Hollywood. All with Chuck Norris. All were left on the cutting room floor. Chucky was usually able to return to the set within 10 days.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

There is one friend in my group of hometown buddies who talks way too much shit when he is drinking. After saving him countless times, we sat back one night and let him get beat up a little before we stepped in. 
 

Luckily it did teach that friend a life lesson and he no longer talks shit.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Mrleft8 said:

I've really only stopped bar fights. I've watched quite a few.

 The best non-bar fight I ever saw was when some big, dumb tattooed guy came in to the local bar and started mouthing off. He was looking for a particular guy, (who was there, quietly drinking a pint of Guinness)

Dumb guy finds out where Cliffy is, and walks up to him. Smacks Cliffy on the back of the head. "I hear you're a bad ass, that can kick anyone's ass" (True)

 Cliffy keeps cool, takes another drink off his pint and quietly tells the guy to please leave him alone. He's just trying to have a few drinks after work, and doesn't want any trouble.

 Big dumb guy turns around and starts chanting at the rest of the patrons "Such a fuckin' tough guy! I see now he's just a pussy!"

 He turns back, and shoves Cliffy's back.

 Cliffy asks the guy to leave him alone.

 Tough guy goes to shove Cliffy again, but Cliffy's right arm goes straight up and back, and his fist connects with tough guys face. Never even turned around.

 Before the tough guy even hit the floor Cliffy was taking another drink. The bar tender brought him another on the house, and a couple of other guys dragged tough guy out to the parking lot. (Never to be seen again)

 Cliffy says: "Some guys just can't take a hint, can they?"

 BTW. Cliffy was a clam and oyster fisherman, who'd also worked as a stone mason. He was a 5th degree (or something like that) Black belt Tae Kwon Do guy, who also worked as a boat Capt. for the Dept. of Homeland Security.

 One of the most peaceful, funniest guys you could ever hope to meet.

Go the Cliffy!....:D

Link to post
Share on other sites
28 minutes ago, SuddenlyBrown said:

There is one friend in my group of hometown buddies who talks way too much shit when he is drinking. After saving him countless times, we sat back one night and let him get beat up a little before we stepped in. 
 

Luckily it did teach that friend a life lesson and he no longer talks shit.

Lol

 

 

 Back in the day I used to hang around the bars with a chap who was a boxer.

He was generally a cool character and would back down from a fight when at all possible, but I did get to witness him making short work out of a guy or two who pushed their luck

Then one night my mate was at a night club and uncharacteristically he was being a dick to a small guy because my mate fancied the other guy’s girl.

The Litle chap gave my mate a few warnings, which he laughed off but unfortunately for my mate, that little guy was a black belt or some shit because he absolutely kicked the living shíte out of my mate. 

So, the moral of the story is, there’s always someone, faster, tougher and badder out there and eventually, we all meet our match.

 

 

 

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
23 hours ago, El Mariachi said:

I thought I was doing pretty well when some whinny-ass kid in Brennan's Pub in Manhattan Beach took a swing at me after I told him that 'Yes, if your fiance suddenly stopped taking your phone calls...then she's either dead.....or she's banging someone else'. He ended up on the floor with my bar stool pinned over his chest and I figured that was that. I let him up a bit later, finished my drink, paid my bill, grabbed my shit and headed to the front door. 

That's when my own bar stool came flying back with a vengeance and almost broke my back. I was 31 at the time....and quickly realized then & there that I either needed to be a bit nicier? Or just avoid bars all together....:lol:

How long ago was that? I thought you were in Baja.

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Meat Wad said:

How long ago was that? I thought you were in Baja.

Apparently....you can't read. Come back in a few years after you graduate 3rd Grade and get your diploma in English comp....and then re-read the original post.

 

(Jfc, what the fuk happened to you people in the last 7 years?)....

Link to post
Share on other sites

I was in that infamous incident at the Clipper Bar behind the shipyard in Porto Cervo in the 80s.  Sardinia Cup, Maxi Series, don't remember.

Very late at night, and an altercation began between a racer and a local, reason unknown.  Very soon it was "all on for young and old," bottles and furniture everywhere.  The Carabinieri turned up, with machine guns too.  One idiot managed to hoof the lights off the top of a police car and very soon the big black bus turned up and about 20 boys spent the night in the pokey.

Only an early morning appeal to HH the Aga Khan saved the day.  He sprung them from jail in the morning and then ripped into them right royally with foul threats of lifetime bans from Sardinia.

Closest I ever got to a big maul.  Thankfully.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

There is only one and it never became a fight.  

I had just heard that an former girlfriend who was an amazing spirit had just died in a horrific motorcycle accident and decided to go out drinking with some friends.  We headed to a local dive bar.  My drink of choice was scotch, which was not wise and I became a belligerent drunken asshole.  At one point, not wanting to wait I grabbed a guy's drink from in front of him and he and his buddies were immediately in my face.  I continued to be an asshole. And, Im sure, quite obnoxious as we faced off.

Then they got very quiet and asked me "Who are your friends?"  "What fuckin' friends"

Behind me there were six guys in Bandito gang colors holding pool cues and beer bottles.   I recognized one of them.  The guys I stole the drink from sat down waved their hands up in surrender.

The biggest Bandito walked up to me and said "Your friend asked us to help. We helped.  You're an asshole.  Get out of here.  This was a one time deal."

I had helped the one Bandito with some permit problem at his own bar about year before.  He returned the favor.  

I no longer drink scotch.

About a year later I went to a party on a ranch.  The Banditos were there as well.  The big guy walked up to me, laughed, said "you're not going to be an asshole are you?" 

And kissed me on the lips.  And laughed his ass off.  

It was a good party.

 

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 1:26 AM, Rain Man said:

Last big bar fight I was in was in T'under Bay in the 70's.   We had to end our set early when it broke out.  I stood behind the stage watching the fisticuffs while the roadies stood in front of the speaker columns trying to fend off the grappling participants.  

Who the fuck gets in bar fights?   Tough guys?   Smart people know how to avoid that shit.  

We've evolved a bit from here:

 

Crocks and Rolls. T-Bay early 90's. Tough town. Used to tree plant in surrounding areas as a summer job. Would come into town from the bush 1 day out of 6 to party our faces off and then go back. The shows were epic and not without shenanigans or slam dancing.

One time the bouncer came up and gave us a tap on the shoulder. 'You guys had better split'...'Oh yeah, why's that'.

He basically pointed at two dudes sitting quietly to the side and said, 'You've been bumping into those guys girls'.

One of them was wearing a certain something that through our blurred half way into a 2-4 and all the way into high test brains we immediately recognized as a certain kind of organized biking.

It was a bit of a no brainer to leave the show a little early that night. 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Playing a biker bar in Darwin back in the early 90's, some idiot started yelling and threatening a big biker sitting by the pool table. The biker nodded at his old lady who had the table, she stepped over, kicked him in the balls, flogged him a few head shots with the pool cue, kicked him in the face a few times when he was on the floor, and went back to her game.

The bouncers carried him outside and called an ambulance, and normal partying resumed.

(I became a musician because I wanted to an artist, and this is what I ended up playing to.......)

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, El Mariachi said:

A/Force Son #1 is getting transferred from Langley to England in a couple months. I should send him your post....:lol:

Most USAF stations in the UK are way out in the countryside (by our standards), there's more likely to be trouble on base.....

Taking the Biggest, RAF Lakenheath, other than several small villages, the nearest town is Newmarket the home of British horse racing... Very genteel.. The Nearest City is Cambridge a  nice city, the university was founded in 1209. That area is full of very clever people the closest in the USA would be silicon valley crossed with Harvard / MIT. generally not the sort of places for bar brawls..

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Happy said:

Playing a biker bar in Darwin back in the early 90's, some idiot started yelling and threatening a big biker sitting by the pool table. The biker nodded at his old lady who had the table, she stepped over, kicked him in the balls, flogged him a few head shots with the pool cue, kicked him in the face a few times when he was on the floor, and went back to her game.

The bouncers carried him outside and called an ambulance, and normal partying resumed.

(I became a musician because I wanted to an artist, and this is what I ended up playing to.......)

 

Nightcliff?

Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, Sea warrior said:

So, the moral of the story is, there’s always someone, faster, tougher and badder out there and eventually, we all meet our match.

That's the biggest truth I've ever learned on bars (I've witnessed many fights in many bars) Had a few too...

The most memorable one was: three friends of mine (brothers) who would always end in a fight, almost every night, once got confronted by a small mob  and they had to flee, so people started throwing stuff at them and they sheltered in a bar (with a large glass door and walls)

Picture the situation, the three brothers in the bar, the mob outside looking and yellling at them and waiting for them to come out. One of the brothers opens the door, grabs the closest guy and pulls him into the bar and beats the shit out of him in front of everybody and pushes him again out the door. The mob at this point is looking at him in disbelief and then one of the other brothers throws a fire extinguisher through the big window and the three brothers run out of the bar screaming  William Wallace style... 

Pretty epic, they just ran away nobody dared get in their way.  I was with another group of friends in a bar a couple of doors down the street.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, 00seven said:

Nightcliff?

Squires Tavern, in town. I actually lived in a room out the back of the Nightcliff for nearly a year when I was running the Vimmi K Band.

 I could write a book just about that pub and the characters that hung out there. I don't know how old you are, but here are a few names you might know: Seedy (C.D. Campbell RIP, I still have a cartoon he did of me on my studio wall), Slick, Fast Eddie, Lou the Lip, Doc, Scotty & Boof (RIP) of the Blonks and later Hells Angels, Stewie the drug dealer, Henry the Maori roadie/Mongrel Mob member, and too many strippers and hookers to name. 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, LB 15 said:

I have never been in a bar fight as such. Been beaten up a few times in bars if that counts.

Was "observing", drink in hand a bar brawl which had moved outside into the parking lot...got blindsided by a one-legged pregnant woman...ended up with stitches over my eye and a nasty cauliflower ear from her grabbing my head and pounding it into the asphalt...not a great story to have on your résumé :lol:...

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, Left Shift said:

There is only one and it never became a fight.  

I had just heard that an former girlfriend who was an amazing spirit had just died in a horrific motorcycle accident and decided to go out drinking with some friends.  We headed to a local dive bar.  My drink of choice was scotch, which was not wise and I became a belligerent drunken asshole.  At one point, not wanting to wait I grabbed a guy's drink from in front of him and he and his buddies were immediately in my face.  I continued to be an asshole. And, Im sure, quite obnoxious as we faced off.

Then they got very quiet and asked me "Who are your friends?"  "What fuckin' friends"

Behind me there were six guys in Bandito gang colors holding pool cues and beer bottles.   I recognized one of them.  The guys I stole the drink from sat down waved their hands up in surrender.

The biggest Bandito walked up to me and said "Your friend asked us to help. We helped.  You're an asshole.  Get out of here.  This was a one time deal."

I had helped the one Bandito with some permit problem at his own bar about year before.  He returned the favor.  

I no longer drink scotch.

About a year later I went to a party on a ranch.  The Banditos were there as well.  The big guy walked up to me, laughed, said "you're not going to be an asshole are you?" 

And kissed me on the lips.  And laughed his ass off.  

It was a good party.

 

Fuk. Ing. Awesome.....:lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites
22 hours ago, Sail4beer said:

I’ve only been on the rescue end of a bar fight a couple of times. There’s always some big, dumb asshole that wants to beat someone up. My friend went outside to an alley for a smoke a long time ago and I saw someone go out the door a minute later with a bad look on his face. I had a strange feeling about it so I went out to find my friend’s face is being used to scrape the stucco off the side of the building. I saw his bloodied face and went bezerk. When I was done with the thug, I’m sure he never lifted a finger in anger for the rest of his life if he even survived. I held him by the throat and must have hit him a hundred times in his right ear until he went to sleep. You don’t want to mess with a small Lefty who was taught to fight, not lose. 
 

A couple of other interesting situations as well, and have always won, but I was lucky/trained enough to have never actually been hit by a punch or kick, drunk people have terrible response times. If their fists could only work as fast as their mouths...that said, I hate violence and have never instigated a fight.

 

Oh my God, now this is funny!  The reincarnation of Lord Dubin has arrived!  

Link to post
Share on other sites

In reality, it was Lord D getting what he deserved. I’m no tough guy. I just stopped a deadly assault and had to drive a friend to the emergency room for a lot of stitches. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
9 minutes ago, Cristoforo said:

Oh my God, now this is funny!  The reincarnation of Lord Dubin has arrived!  

Surprised there wasn't a mention of a "moonlight stroll"...:D

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Grabbler said:

Surprised there wasn't a mention of a "moonlight stroll"...:D

I wonder what was the name of the girl he beat up? I'm guessing 'Yentl' 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Back in the 80s I worked on a seismic boat pretty much all over the east and gulf coasts. A couple of guys on the seismic crew from Houston fancied themselves to be streetfighting men. We'd hit port and hit the nearest bar to the dock and generally these 2 guys could bluster and blow smoke and intimidate most bar denizens into submission and somehow never come to blows... except in the Louisianna bayou, of course, where you just shut up and drink your beer if you have any sense.

So we've been at the dock in Quonset Point, RI for about a week and these guys are getting restless hanging at the local bar just outside the gate and decide to head up to the Combat Zone, the 3 or 4 block wild strip up in South Boston. They asked me to ride along to fill out the cab but I, being a peaceful guy, wisely declined. They did talk a deck hand, a huge, hulking amateur boxer, nice guy but a little slow, into riding along with them.

Next AM I hear moans coming from Brian's, the loudest most obnoxious blowhard of them, bunk. I start poking him giving him shit and trying to get the story out of him and instead of jumping in my face he whines and begs me to please, please stop it and just leave him alone. Both he and the other guy stayed in their bunks for 2 days before showing their bashed and bruised faces in the galley and neither ever said what happened up there, but they obviously had been spanked and sent home by the big kids.

I learned a lot from their experience.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

We're any other So Calians here at THIS epic Devo concert? Shit howdy but what a f'ng night. Went there with my best friend Moose....to both of them. (Moose, by the way (on the right) could curl 160 lbs....with one arm. He had that gentle giant thing going....but didn't put up with any fuknanigans from twat-waffles. And a few of them learned that the hard way that evening......:lol:

 

https://www.pe.com/2020/08/11/40-years-ago-there-was-a-riot-at-a-devo-show-in-riverside-heres-what-happened-next

FB_IMG_1584119336089.jpg

Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, Sail4beer said:

Looks like he has a 7 oz beer in his paw!

Nah.....that was definitely a full sizer there......:lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Boehemian, no less! 
 

Chris, the guy I had to stop was around 6’2” and about 250lbs, much more of a man than you could ever be. He learned that he shouldn’t bother people pissing on a wall and having a smoke. Quit being a cunt and tell us your bar fight story. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Love bars, hate fights. I've managed to avoid fights somehow over the years, I'm not sure how, I've definitely been ready to go when an isolated chad here or there fucked with my woman. One memorable fight started in the bar, ended with me hanging out of a taxi cab on New Years Eve, committed to preventing the stock broker in the passenger seat from pulling away. Cops involved, cuffed, face down on the asphalt, broker slipped away with a pocket full of coke. I stood correctly in front of the cop, said "yessir, nossir" got a desk appearance ticket. I told the judge the truth, that I was preventing the fuck-wipe from achieving his plans involving that pocket full of coke and my oblivious woman. "He was getting smart with you?" "Yes sir." Dismissed.

Given that, a fight with a friend, fully padded, mouth guard, headgear, love for your buddy, follow the rules due to mutual respect rather than a ref, it's one of the best things ever, to spar with a friend. The punches only hurt physically, but they ache of love.

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 8:11 AM, Sail4beer said:

I’ve only been on the rescue end of a bar fight a couple of times. There’s always some big, dumb asshole that wants to beat someone up. My friend went outside to an alley for a smoke a long time ago and I saw someone go out the door a minute later with a bad look on his face. I had a strange feeling about it so I went out to find my friend’s face is being used to scrape the stucco off the side of the building. I saw his bloodied face and went bezerk. When I was done with the thug, I’m sure he never lifted a finger in anger for the rest of his life if he even survived. I held him by the throat and must have hit him a hundred times in his right ear until he went to sleep. You don’t want to mess with a small Lefty who was taught to fight, not lose. 
 

A couple of other interesting situations as well, and have always won, but I was lucky/trained enough to have never actually been hit by a punch or kick, drunk people have terrible response times. If their fists could only work as fast as their mouths...that said, I hate violence and have never instigated a fight.

 

As Meli says, it’s mostly an American thing, I guess:blink:

I've seen way more fights in Oz per weekend than I ever did in the USA. People just say shit there, and then the poonches flow. Maybe the British thing? The Brits are insane, they have turned "glassing" into a verb, as in smashing someone in the face with a fucking glass. I would rather take my chances with a Yank than a European.

161599322_ScreenShot2021-04-16at12_34_06PM.png.eec5819487dd75b5b05d5b4041d56419.png

But yeah, lefties are hard to fight unless they have some experience. Our balance is already fucked, we don't favor a side, we switch stances because there is no other way to connect without switching a stance sometimes. Boxing and pitching might be one of the few areas where us lefties have an advantage. But I once trained in a bit of Wing Chun maybe thirty years ago with Jose Grados, and the lefty-advantage disappeared, the stances were all symmetric. I liked it in theory, but real life isn't like that, it's asymmetric all the time. Of course, Jose could easily take me any day of the week, with him hung over and myself half-dynamite. A professional can pretty much use any style in the boxing ring, and as long as they stay legal, still get the points.

 

I'll say this ... I've never encountered anyone in the USA sufficiently belligerent that can't be calmed down with a cigarette and a bit of compassion for their pain. Most people who want to fight in or around a bar, are in a great deal and pain and just want to talk.

Link to post
Share on other sites

There was this biker, his name, "Tiny", which he was anything but.
First time I met tiny, who was head and shoulders taller than me, I stomped on his foot. He was wearing steel toed biker boots and simply laughed.... my foot hurt for a week.
Anyhow the bar we all frequented was this old man's bar which a odd mix of middle aged blue collar types (mailmen, UPS drivers, etc), bikers and young hippy types would at times erupt over the occasional misunderstanding over either the pool table or some perceived insult to the women folk. It was customary to haul off and hit the person standing next to you as the festivities.... like a bad Burt Reynolds movie.
Tiny and I were shooting a friendly game of pool. A skirmish started at the other end of a crowded bar and as things started to progress to a full on brawl, I grabbed Tiny by the shoulders and drove his forehead into the corner pocket. Out went the lights, Tiny was down for the count.... and frankly, I liked Tiny and felt awful. But it was an act of self-preservation. If I had not made the first move, Tiny would have likely pummeled me without a second thought. 
Bar cleared out and we all went our separate ways before the po-po arrived on the scene.
About a week later we are back in the bar, I walked up to Tiny and apologized. He said he wanted to kill me but since I had the nuts to walk right up to him, he accepted. We shook hands and racked 'em up for another game of 8 ball.

Frankly I was a bit scared. More so that I had knocked the guy out then what he might do next time we crossed paths.... although that too was a concern.
Last bar-room brawl I was ever in. While I only intended to get the upper hand on Tiny, I could have accidently killed the guy.

Link to post
Share on other sites

How about my first one? By far the most edumacational. I'm 18, playing football and thinking I'm a hardass. In a cowboy bar with a friend playing shuffleboard. The old Stetson wearing bastard at the bar decided his wife was wrong about him having already had too many and he forcibly took her purse and hit her with it. Of course I'm going to step in. I got to "Hey I don't think..." and I went sliding across the tiled floor like a shuffleboard puck.  A round house to the kisser is what it took to make me realize yeah...I don't think.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 11:24 AM, El Mariachi said:

A/Force Son #1 is getting transferred from Langley to England in a couple months. I should send him your post....:lol:

Air Force daughter was assigned to England last August.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 10:56 AM, LenP said:

Wasn't really much of a fight. First date with my now wife along with my friend and her friend who were dating at the time. We were in a nightclub in DC, this would have been just over three decades ago now. There was a guy pointing what I took to be a fake gun at my friend, who took off the second he saw it with the girls following after him. I followed behind, but still convinced this was a guy my size (short) with a fake gun just trying to intimidate my buddy. I head back in, after promising my now wife it was just to get my jacket, but with the intention of confronting the guy. Well I did manage to confront him, but soon realized that my judgement with regards to his size (he was more like 6'2") and the fakeness of his gun (it was real) were both incorrect. The hammer from the pistol managed to fully puncture my cheek when he pistol whipped me with it. I spent 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding so my date would not realize I had done something stupid. That did not work either, which was evident when my date stopped speaking English and would only yell at me in Spanish when I got back outside. The girls flagged down a couple cops who stopped the guy with the gun coming out of the club, they took his gun talked to him for a few minutes, gave the gun back to him, then came back to us and explained he is a cop and we should get out of DC immediately. We did, and thankfully my now wife forgave me for my stupidity. I have also kept my promise to not be so stupid again. 

Variant on this was a friend of mine sees his buddy getting dragged across the floor by some guy.  My friend intervenes and takes on the dragger. Fight spills outside. In the struggle my friend sees the antogonist reaching towards his ankle for a gun. My friend's brain commits to doing does whatever he could to stop that action. He is then beaten and kicked by at least 6 other guys. 

Friend is hauled off to jail just prior to being killed on the scene.

When my friend's story is revealed and corroborated by bar owner and others, my friend is released and needed many months of healing.

3 guesses on the profession of the crowd that gang that kicked and beat him.

Yup. Cops. It seems that, in the 80's, a cop pulling a gun and his coworkers kicking the shit out of you only warranted a grudging release from jail when the fight and subsequent beating was over someone saying hello to the cop's girlfriend.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
52 minutes ago, DarthSailor said:

Air Force daughter was assigned to England last August.

Does she like it there?....

Link to post
Share on other sites

Jersey Shore at a ‘surf club’ dance.  Big drunk buddy bumped into some greasers girl & they threw a few.  Buddy’s glasses lost in the shuffle. Club said we gotta leave & come back after closing to search.  We drive down Ocean Blvd a ways and pull off.  Greasers had followed us and jumped us as we got out.   Got cold cocked with a tire iron.  Out cold, 2 days in hospital.  Not my fight, never threw any and, def got the worst of all that.

Link to post
Share on other sites
46 minutes ago, PurpleOnion said:

Variant on this was a friend of mine sees his buddy getting dragged across the floor by some guy.  My friend intervenes and takes on the dragger. Fight spills outside. In the struggle my friend sees the antogonist reaching towards his ankle for a gun. My friend's brain commits to doing does whatever he could to stop that action. He is then beaten and kicked by at least 6 other guys. 

Friend is hauled off to jail just prior to being killed on the scene.

When my friend's story is revealed and corroborated by bar owner and others, my friend is released and needed many months of healing.

3 guesses on the profession of the crowd that gang that kicked and beat him.

Yup. Cops. It seems that, in the 80's, a cop pulling a gun and his coworkers kicking the shit out of you only warranted a grudging release from jail when the fight and subsequent beating was over someone saying hello to the cop's girlfriend.

 

One word------> El Segundo, Ca. in the 60's & 70's.

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Blue Crab said:

It's still the way things are.

The shit I witnessed 1st hand working at New Pacific Lumber on Sepulveda in the early 70's was pretty bad. The shit I heard from Dad and a lot of older locals there that went on in the 50's & 60's was much worse. And the shit I heard in the 80's & early 90's from my surf bud Moose (who went on to become ESFD's Battalion chief)......was just slightly less un-good. 

 

I'm pretty sure it's gotten much better there, 'cuz another good old surf bud of mine has owned one of the most successful real estate businesses there in all of So Cal (E/S) for a lotta years now.....and with all of his community involvement, fundraisers and charities and what not....he wouldn't put up with an ass-backwards Olde Mississippi-style hick town for one g-damn second.....

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, El Mariachi said:

One word------> El Segundo, Ca. in the 60's & 70's.

This was the Bronx.  You know, the place that was burning in the 70's.

Stories from the crowd there are usually fascinating.  A visit to the infamous Bronxonia Yacht Club can teach you a few things about the world (if you define world as the Bronx as they do).  One of the more interesting ones was about about the burning mentioned above.  A local firefighter made the mistake of dismissively telling a guy at the scene that the fire he was so proud about wasn't anything.  A week later, said firefighter had to respond to a high-rise fire at another project building and the same upstanding gentleman asked him if this one was big enough.  The "game" then was to burn down your public housing so you would be first in line for the new, better public housing.

Apologies for the thread drift.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, Happy said:

Squires Tavern, in town. I actually lived in a room out the back of the Nightcliff for nearly a year when I was running the Vimmi K Band.

 I could write a book just about that pub and the characters that hung out there. I don't know how old you are, but here are a few names you might know: Seedy (C.D. Campbell RIP, I still have a cartoon he did of me on my studio wall), Slick, Fast Eddie, Lou the Lip, Doc, Scotty & Boof (RIP) of the Blonks and later Hells Angels, Stewie the drug dealer, Henry the Maori roadie/Mongrel Mob member, and too many strippers and hookers to name. 

 

Squires? That's really using the way back machine! I did some of my apprenticeship at the Holden dealer (Suttons before it became Kerrys). The cage bar was a place you didn't look left or right when approaching the bar. I remember some of the guys you mentioned.

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 9:56 AM, Shortforbob said:

 

 

I worked behind many bars for a few years, a few rough ones. maybe saw 4-5 fights the bouncers either sorted fast or escalated when they were bored. Mostly us barmaids sorted the trouble.

I think it's mostly an American thing.

WTF? You think bar fights are an American invention? I think they were going on long before Columbus came over here :rolleyes:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Walking in to a bar, I encounter 1 bouncer trying to shove 2 fighters out the door. Fighter 1, presumably the losing one, grabs me as a shield as #2 swings and I get punched in the forehead. My head goes back and smashes #1's nose. Blood everywhere, the bouncer is now trying to throw all three of us out, I get loose and make it to the bar and the bouncer throws 1 and 2 out the door. My head hurt a little, but no where close to number 1's nose :lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites

More of a stare down than anything. I'm at Clarke's, a burger joint in Mountain View with a buddy. Buddy, a regular who knows exactly what he wants, walks up to the counter and orders. There are also two guys staring at the menu on the wall trying their level best to figure out what to order. Short guy maybe 5'10' and not unfamiliar with the gym, says to my 6'7" 180 and very familiar with the piano buddy: how rude! but with some extra relish. Sensing that this wasn't going to end, I say quite firmly all right that's enough. My buddy apologizes and finishes his order. But short guy reiterates no, really, how rude! I say you had a point and you've made your point but refuse to look at him. Basically I stare at the ceiling but in a way that says, open your mouth again and I'll take you outside. It ends there.

Link to post
Share on other sites

1). I'm not that big and I'm not that tough.....but gawd DAMN can I talk a good game at times if I really need to....which has probably saved me $1000's in dentist bills & plastic surgery in the last half century.

 

2). Lesson learned #2.....if shit's starting to get warmed up in the batting cage and you feel you're gonna need at least a triple to get the fuk around the bases and off to freedom....ALWAYS take your swings on the biggest guy in the group. 'Cuz the little guys? Are like 147 lb. Ninja trained Chihuahuas on Angel dust and 9 times out of 10 will fuk you up quicker than you can say Chihuahua.

 

Don't ask me how I know this.....:lol:

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, kent_island_sailor said:

WTF? You think bar fights are an American invention? I think they were going on long before Columbus came over here :rolleyes:

Oh my yes. Especially the Aussies I knew. When my lifeguard service did a summer “guard exchange” program with one of the agencies in Oz........we’re talking 1976/77 here.....the 10 that came over here with us were hell raisers beyond compare. Unless they (Aussies)  have changed considerably or ocean lifeguards were a particularly troublesome group......hell raisers but a really fun group to spend time with. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, kent_island_sailor said:

WTF? You think bar fights are an American invention? I think they were going on long before Columbus came over here :rolleyes:

Ever see that pic of Julius Caeser with the black eye and nine stitches on his lip?....

Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, El Mariachi said:

Ever see that pic of Julius Caeser with the black eye and nine stitches on his lip?....

Yeahe, that wase paintned aftere bad nite oute Romes Zona Rossa!                                               :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, mikewof said:

 I've managed to avoid fights somehow over the years, I'm not sure how, 

If you act in real life like you do here, none of us have a fucking clue either.

I think I'd end up taking a swing at you, and I'm a pacifist who mostly likes you.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, mikewof said:

I've seen way more fights in Oz per weekend than I ever did in the USA. People just say shit there, and then the poonches flow.

Mikey, were you ever here or is this just more of your bullshit?

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/15/2021 at 3:26 PM, Rain Man said:

Who the fuck gets in bar fights?   Tough guys?   Smart people know how to avoid that shit.

Yep.

It's far more dangerous now with the prevalence of steroids.  Roid-rage is common. The punch knocks em out and the back of the head hitting the tiles is the problem.

Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Se7en said:

If you act in real life like you do here, none of us have a fucking clue either.

I think I'd end up taking a swing at you, and I'm a pacifist who mostly likes you.

Why would you take a swing at me? I'd buy you a beer and get you tell me about the time you made her say "ouch."

Here vs. real life, I'm mostly the same. The difference is that here there are small handful of mostly anonymous asswagons who imagine their balls to be a good bit bigger in SA then they are on terra firma, so they build an online persona for themselves by trying to disagree with my usually unassailable positions.

 

As for real life ... there were a good number of fights in Denver area bars when I was coming up, by the time I got to NYC, I marveled at the relative peace and calm of those bars, union activity in NYC was a quiet kind of thing. But in Colorado, after Old Man Coors broke up the Union, your choice of beverage at the bar instantly said a lot. If you Bud or a Pabst, a Michelob or a Hamms, pretty much anything that we assumed was a union beer (we often didn't actually know) then things stayed calm. If you ordered a Coors, then you were either from out of town and didn't know any better, or you were a Coors employee (and thus a scab) who had to order a Coors, or you were some kind of asshole who liked to start shit with the union.

If a Coors ended up on the counter, there would be words at minimum, and at worst, it would escalate.

In Golden though, the opposite, the Coors (scab) employees HAD to order Coors, or a shop foreman would see and narc on their ass, and that would be the end of their job. Usually it was safe enough for the scabs when they stayed in Golden, but the Chicanos and Blacks and union workers who were fucked by Coors did make their way to the end of Colfax when they had the vinegar to do so, and then the shit brewed. Union-centered fights were just a fact of life around Denver and Golden. The thought of people fighting over a woman, or a spilled schooner, or some other petty nonsense, that was inconceivable. The fights were over the fabric of life, and being a scab was something that smart people hid from view. And the KKK membership in this state (at one point supposedly 10% of adult males) was a constant source of fights. They would do their little caravans up Colfax to go to Coor's personal dance hall on South Table Mountain, but Colorado is a Mexican and Black and Jew kind of place, so they eventually burned down the dance hall, and then it was open season on the KKK here. That was tied into union membership. There was no such thing as a union KKK member, and if you were a scab, you were suspected of having KKK sympathies. The Denver Police turned the other way on a lot of these bar fights, they weren't about to fuck with the unions either.

Amazingly, now, nobody gives a shit. They piss on unions with unashamed hatred. Intelligent, aware people, they'll literally bad-mouth a union, or deliberately take their business to a non-union shop, given the option. I would have never thought that Colorado would turn into a half-scab state, but sure enough, here we are. We have been infected with this idea that we can all become millionaires given the right conditions, and the way to make that happen is by stabbing our bothers and sisters in the back.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I left just before this fight started. But it is a life lesson. 
 

Never sucker punch the friendliest most popular guy in a bar. I played softball and bowled with a group of guys who were life long friends. 2 assholes decided they didn’t like that 2 of these guys beat them in pool. They waited until the rest of the people at their table left so it looked like they were there alone. But in reality the other 12 guys in this bar were friends and family. 
 

Long story short, 5 minutes later these 2 were running away from the bar with bruises, no shoes, jackets, and no car keys. Easy for the police to find them as their car was left behind