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16 years ago a great woman died


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Young, at 76.

I miss my mother so much it makes me cry just thinking about her last days.

Anyway, just needed to vent. Sorry.

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Yes, she was born in Kentucky, and died on Kentucky Derby Day.... 90 seconds after the race ended.

 

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Condolences. Lost my father almost 60 years ago, but still have "conversations" almost every week. They never leave us until our memories do.

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Condolences. My brother died unexpectedly 3 years ago, and sailing without him is one of the hardest things to do.  I keep looking down the dock subconsciously expecting him, while knowing he won’t be there.   Both parents passed years ago, but I’m finding it harder to recover from a sibling death...he was there all my life, our kids grew up together.  

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19 hours ago, 130lights said:

Condolences. My brother died unexpectedly 3 years ago, and sailing without him is one of the hardest things to do.  I keep looking down the dock subconsciously expecting him, while knowing he won’t be there.   Both parents passed years ago, but I’m finding it harder to recover from a sibling death...he was there all my life, our kids grew up together.  

My brother died just short of a year ago.  We grew up sailing together and did most of our sailing and many double-handed races together.  I don't want to sail without him.  I'm nowhere near over his death, it was before his time.  But I know time will heal and I'll get back to sailing and trusting people on boats.  

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thoughts to all

mine passed some seven years ago

was a wonderfully generous and strong but also fragile woman

i owe her an awful lot

generally I go climb a mountain and brew up a tea up top for awhile

today i went for a kayak paddle with a group but enjoyed the calm and peace to remember her

they never leave us

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Mum's , ya only ever get one , cherish em

 

and Happy Mothers Day to all our SA mom's :wub:

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2 minutes ago, Mid said:

Mum's , ya only ever get one , cherish em

 

and Happy Mothers Day to all our SA mom's :wub:

Yup.

I'd like to add that it's very sad when mother's turn on their children. Children who love them, and cherish them no matter how badly they are treated. It leaves deep wounds that don't heal.

 It's a 3 way street.

16 years ago today, my wife took her mother to S. Africa for a 10 day safari. (Yes, the day after my mother died, but the safari had been booked, my mother's death had not.)

Last month my murder-in-law trashed my wife for being an insensitive, selfish bitch.

 This from a woman who my wife has flown around the world dozens of times. Sent her money when she was low on cash (She wasn't, she was just being miserly), and baby sat while her second husband was dying.

It's sad to see a mamma rabbit eat her young. It's worse to see a spoiled Sweet Briar debutante abandon her daughter.

(And yes, I'm ranting.)

 

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30 minutes ago, Cal20sailor said:

No it's not.  I'm sorry for your pain.  

No, it's Snot. And I thank you for your sympathy.

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54 minutes ago, Mrleft8 said:

Yup.

I'd like to add that it's very sad when mother's turn on their children. Children who love them, and cherish them no matter how badly they are treated. It leaves deep wounds that don't heal.

 It's a 3 way street.

16 years ago today, my wife took her mother to S. Africa for a 10 day safari. (Yes, the day after my mother died, but the safari had been booked, my mother's death had not.)

Last month my murder-in-law trashed my wife for being an insensitive, selfish bitch.

 This from a woman who my wife has flown around the world dozens of times. Sent her money when she was low on cash (She wasn't, she was just being miserly), and baby sat while her second husband was dying.

It's sad to see a mamma rabbit eat her young. It's worse to see a spoiled Sweet Briar debutante abandon her daughter.

(And yes, I'm ranting.)

 

? Vascular dementia?

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1 hour ago, Mrleft8 said:

Yup.

I'd like to add that it's very sad when mother's turn on their children. Children who love them, and cherish them no matter how badly they are treated. It leaves deep wounds that don't heal.

 It's a 3 way street.

16 years ago today, my wife took her mother to S. Africa for a 10 day safari. (Yes, the day after my mother died, but the safari had been booked, my mother's death had not.)

Last month my murder-in-law trashed my wife for being an insensitive, selfish bitch.

 This from a woman who my wife has flown around the world dozens of times. Sent her money when she was low on cash (She wasn't, she was just being miserly), and baby sat while her second husband was dying.

It's sad to see a mamma rabbit eat her young. It's worse to see a spoiled Sweet Briar debutante abandon her daughter.

(And yes, I'm ranting.)

 

Won't go into details but I feel your wifes pain. Just because they are your mother doesn't make them a good person. Its taken me a lifetime to come to peace with that, I hope your wife doesn't take that long. 

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3 hours ago, Mrleft8 said:

Yup.

I'd like to add that it's very sad when mother's turn on their children. Children who love them, and cherish them no matter how badly they are treated. It leaves deep wounds that don't heal.

 It's a 3 way street.

16 years ago today, my wife took her mother to S. Africa for a 10 day safari. (Yes, the day after my mother died, but the safari had been booked, my mother's death had not.)

Last month my murder-in-law trashed my wife for being an insensitive, selfish bitch.

 This from a woman who my wife has flown around the world dozens of times. Sent her money when she was low on cash (She wasn't, she was just being miserly), and baby sat while her second husband was dying.

It's sad to see a mamma rabbit eat her young. It's worse to see a spoiled Sweet Briar debutante abandon her daughter.

(And yes, I'm ranting.)

 

I had a MIL a bit like that - she scored 60% on a standardized narcissism scale.

What's the saying? "You can choose your friends but not your family".

I got lucky with mine.

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22 hours ago, olaf hart said:

 

Disregard the above. Forum assholery.

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My mother's the tall one. I'm the short guy.

I was probably 6 at the time. And that's probably the last picture taken where my sister was taller than me

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Mom was on her very last hours. We gathered in her condo, all 8 of her surviving chidren to have a "family " dinner like she had given us for so many years. Sibling from 1000 miles away arrived.  A simple spaghetti dinner was planned. She had resisted extra morphine as the cancer literally ate away at her skin and body so she could remain coherent. A loud noise from the kitchen, crushing garlic, startled her rest. A weak voice from her nearby bedroom called out, "i don't think I like my children anymore":ph34r:

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1 hour ago, Mrleft8 said:

Disregard the above. Forum assholery.

Sorry, trying to be helpful, that sort of behavioural change is sometimes a sign of pathology..

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57 minutes ago, olaf hart said:

Sorry, trying to be helpful, that sort of behavioural change is sometimes a sign of pathology..

I think she's been that way her whole life. It would kind of explain why the Judge (My wife's father)ran off with his secretary after 17 years of what, from first hand accounts was a nightmare for all involved.

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I guess I was lucky. Stories here, and any number of friends and acquaintances tell stories of parental problems. I couldn’t have asked for a better Mom & Dad.
 

So I join the Boy Scouts at 11 yo. Came home with a list of uniform and camping stuff that was required. As a military family we didn’t exactly have “excess income”. Mom...who was a military stay at home wife suddenly announces she has a job. A month later I get surprised when I come home from school with brand new Boy Scout stuff. Mom works another month or two and quits. Says she got bored. Another word was never spoken about it until I was about 30. After dinner talk got around to my time in scouting. I mentioned how surprised I was to get all new stuff. Dad looked at me and said......”you know son, that’s why your Mother got a job for a few months”. I never put those things together. Mom smiled and looked down. I cried like a baby.

I was lucky.

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