You Melbourne guys clearly had different names for your puerile behavior. Be a bit fraught with danger pressing your junk against a cold window on a cold Melbourne winters day. I thought all you Victorians had small dicks because of that gay football you play down there but it turns out it is only the cold.No it's not - that's a squashed frog.
A pressed ham is simply your naked arse up against the window. And a gargoyle? well, that's a more convivial proposition.
Didn't you pay attention in high school?