Designing a marine bidet

[Rasputin22]

The Portal...

 

[The Lucky One]

Tie that into a sensor in the holding tank, and make it glow red when the tank's above a certain level.

Once the others on the boat get used to it, wire in a hidden switch to override it. Flip the switch, then declare everyone's gotta hang overboard. Problem solved!

 

[Neutral President]

They've already designed a marine bidet.  It's called a corsair F24 trimaran.

 

[Zonker]

Rasp's picture is very close to what I saw.

I can see it featuring in a horror film... "The Portal"

with Alec Baldwin and Miley Cyrus. Who will get sucked in??!!

 

[Rasputin22]

Don't tell Baldwin that it is a 'Cold Hole'...

 

[Jud - s/v Sputnik]

I’ve had (and will have) multiple opportunities to use a very fancy lighted and heated seat bidet in a big Air B n B house we’ll be staying at for a big out of town electrical installation job next week.  Honestly, I just cannot deal with the idea of a toilet spraying water on my anus.  There, I said it.  I lived in Japan for four years - never there either!  It sounds awful.  And ineffective.  And sloppy wet.  There, I said that too.  Ewww. 

 

[The Lucky One]

I wasn't keen on the theory until this little thing called ulcerative colitis came in to my life. The bidet has been saving my butt ever since.

It also benefits the ladies... I've been told that it's very refreshing after certain activities, easing the "friction burns".

 

[DDW]

I believe a Dometic and perhaps also a Raritan model is already offered with a Bidet option. 

 

[slap]

The Portal...

You hear stories about snakes, lizards, big spiders, etc lurking in the bowl at night.   This way you can check before you sit when it's dark.

 

[slap]

View attachment bidet.mp4

 

[Ajax]

That's a little stronger than I had in mind. 

 

[Elegua]

That's a little stronger than I had in mind. 

Most you can adjust the power and angle of attack.  If you go full-bore, just remember to change it back to the original setting or the next occupant may get a surprise. 

 

[toddster]

You hear stories about snakes, lizards, big spiders, etc lurking in the bowl at night.   This way you can check before you sit when it's dark.

The town where I used to wurk took its water directly from the Columbia River.  Just went through some settling tanks, light chlorination, then out to the town.  Most older houses had toilet clams.   You’d see them just down there in the channel below the bowl where the brush doesn’t usually quite reach.  You’d sneak quietly into the bathroom to see if you could catch a glimpse before they… clammed up.  So yeah, your junk would be dangling right down there in front of the clam.  But they can’t reach out that far.  Probably.  

 

[TwoLegged]

I grew up in a house with a bidet.  When I left home, I lived for years without one, and missed it.

Then my muslim friends introduced me to a lota.   No complexity, and it does a great job.

I have several: brass, stainless steel, aluminum, and plastic.

The brass one is prettiest when polished, but I'm too lazy to polish it.  Stainless stays pretty, but although it's a lot lighter than the bronze, it's heavier than the aluminium.  The plastic one is lighter still, and its long spout is handy, but I don't trust plastic to stay clean.  So even though the aluminium one oxidises, it's the one I use most.

On a boat, I use a plastic one, 'cos it makes less noise when rattling around.

                 

 

[weightless]

I've been told that it's very refreshing after certain activities, easing the "friction burns".

Butt cleaning anthem?

 

[weightless]

On the lota theme:

 

[toddster]

Butt seriously… a locker full of toilet paper is like, the most ridiculous affectation on the boat.  “We have to turn back!  There are only four rolls left!”

 

[penumbra]

Kind of shocked the brain trust didn't already highlight a youtube flesh pusher's prior efforts on the topic:

 

[Elegua]

22 minutes ago, penumbra said:

Kind of shocked the brain trust didn't already highlight a youtube flesh pusher's prior efforts on the topic:

That's a white man's bum-gun, as posted in the first several posts.  

 

[loneshark64]

I’ve had (and will have) multiple opportunities to use a very fancy lighted and heated seat bidet in a big Air B n B house we’ll be staying at for a big out of town electrical installation job next week.  Honestly, I just cannot deal with the idea of a toilet spraying water on my anus.  There, I said it.  I lived in Japan for four years - never there either!  It sounds awful.  And ineffective.  And sloppy wet.  There, I said that too.  Ewww. 

I’m with you on this. I’m a traditionalist. Imagine you are at a bar drinking with Robin Knox Johnson, Bill Tilman and Larry Pardey, and you say “Hey guys, I’m going to put a bidet on my boat!” Just say no.