i'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting

LostDaggerboard

Super Anarchist
favorite so far:

(440): I love you

(720): are you drunk

(440): yes but I def love you, we should get married

(720): But I'm Jewish

(440): embrace Jesus

and this one:

(703): Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.

and:

(460) wrigley field is MILF paradise

 

War Dog

Banned
3,982
2
S.F. Bay
(360): I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock

Labels: (360)

:blink:

(631): Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?

Labels: (631)

:lol:

(310): Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?

Labels: (310)

Ok last one. From 209 area code SSC after the DDR??

(209): Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night

Labels: (209)

:ph34r:

 
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troy

Member
129
0
SSYC
my vote:

(310): i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.

 

Barkley

Super Anarchist
3,844
9
C eh N eh D eh.
(504): can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...

(703): Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)

(540): awesome babe! drinks tonight!

(703): Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.

Labels: (540), (703)

 
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Terrorvision

Super Anarchist
4,309
99
(214): your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.

(1-214): we're not divorced.

(970): Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.

(970): Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right

(601): How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?

(318): Alcohol?

(601): Sex with a fat chick.

 
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