Joke
- Thread starter JOD
- Start date
TheUltimateSockPuppet
Anarchist
mainsheetsister
Super Anarchist
SloopJohnB
Super Anarchist
Just a quick word on my divorce we decided to split the house she got the inside I got the outside
burndoc
Super Anarchist
d'ranger
Super Anarchist
- 29,477
- 4,543
On that note (pun) and in honor of the season I submit "Drop Kick Me Jesus Through The Goal Posts of Life"
billy backstay
Backstay, never bought a suit, never went to Vegas
Reminds me of the song "Took a baseball to your pretty little souped up SUV, and carved my initials in the leather seats", or something like that..
burndoc
Super Anarchist
Carrie Underwood song. The one i was thinking of was done by Jerry Reed i think. The guy who played the trucker in Smokey and the Bandit. Couldn't think of his name
SloopJonB
Super Anarchist
Snowman.
AKA Cledus Snow.
AKA Cledus Snow.
Glenn McCarthy
Super Anarchist
Am I safe here with people who have senses of humors, or do I have to take it to PA?
A Democrat walked into the bar and said to the bartender, "I'd like to try something new!" The bartender said, "We have a new drink called the Mueller Report." The Democrat said, "I'll have it!" The bartender handed him an empty glass.
A Democrat walked into the bar and said to the bartender, "I'd like to try something new!" The bartender said, "We have a new drink called the Mueller Report." The Democrat said, "I'll have it!" The bartender handed him an empty glass.
Grande Mastere Dreade
Snag's spellchecker
warbird
Super Anarchist
mainsheetsister
Super Anarchist
SloopJohnB
Super Anarchist
[SIZE=16pt]Guy: 'Doctor, my girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection
and the condom never broke. How is it possible?'
Doctor: 'Let me tell you a story. There was once a hunter who always
carried a gun wherever he went. One day he took his umbrella instead
of his gun and went out. A lion suddenly jumped in front of him. In
order to scare the lion, the hunter used the umbrella like a gun, and
shot the lion and killed it!'
Guy: 'Nonsense! Someone else must have shot the lion.'
Doctor: 'Good! You understood the story. Next patient, please.'[/SIZE]
and the condom never broke. How is it possible?'
Doctor: 'Let me tell you a story. There was once a hunter who always
carried a gun wherever he went. One day he took his umbrella instead
of his gun and went out. A lion suddenly jumped in front of him. In
order to scare the lion, the hunter used the umbrella like a gun, and
shot the lion and killed it!'
Guy: 'Nonsense! Someone else must have shot the lion.'
Doctor: 'Good! You understood the story. Next patient, please.'[/SIZE]
P_Wop
Super Anarchist
"I ended a five-year relationship last night."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. How are you doing?"
"Just fine, thanks. It wasn't my relationship."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. How are you doing?"
"Just fine, thanks. It wasn't my relationship."
SloopJohnB
Super Anarchist
Miracles Do Happen
Trovão
Super Anarchist
Grande Mastere Dreade
Snag's spellchecker
On The Hard
Super Anarchist
I thought I'd rerun this classic from page 4, Always gives me a chuckle..
A penguin is driving into a small town and notices his engine is giving off blue smoke. He drives into a repair shop and the mechanic tells him it will be about an hour to check things over. The penguin decides to walk across the street to McDonald's for lunch.
Penguins' tastes being what they are, rather than a Big Mac, the penguin orders a fish sandwich, finishes it and heads back to the garage.
Seeing him coming, the mechanic solemnly shakes his head and observes, "Buddy, it looks like you've blown a seal!"
The penguin quickly wipes his beak with a flipper and replies, "No, that's just tartar sauce."
A penguin is driving into a small town and notices his engine is giving off blue smoke. He drives into a repair shop and the mechanic tells him it will be about an hour to check things over. The penguin decides to walk across the street to McDonald's for lunch.
Penguins' tastes being what they are, rather than a Big Mac, the penguin orders a fish sandwich, finishes it and heads back to the garage.
Seeing him coming, the mechanic solemnly shakes his head and observes, "Buddy, it looks like you've blown a seal!"
The penguin quickly wipes his beak with a flipper and replies, "No, that's just tartar sauce."
Cal20sailor
Super Anarchist
^^^^. Classic, but I find it better with the ice cream cone.