Joke

valis

Super Anarchist
3,782
611
Friday Harbor, WA
aWYDp42_460swp.webp
objects_in_mirror.png


 

burndoc

Super Anarchist
1,290
337
South Jersey
Reminds me of the song "Took a baseball to your pretty little souped up SUV, and carved my initials in the leather seats", or something like that..
Carrie Underwood song. The one i was thinking of was done by Jerry Reed i think. The guy who played the trucker in Smokey and the Bandit. Couldn't think of his name

 

Glenn McCarthy

Super Anarchist
1,850
302
Elmhurst, IL
Am I safe here with people who have senses of humors, or do I have to take it to PA?

A Democrat walked into the bar and said to the bartender, "I'd like to try something new!" The bartender said, "We have a new drink called the Mueller Report." The Democrat said, "I'll have it!" The bartender handed him an empty glass.

 

warbird

Super Anarchist
16,673
1,420
lake michigan
Am I safe here with people who have senses of humors, or do I have to take it to PA?

A Democrat walked into the bar and said to the bartender, "I'd like to try something new!" The bartender said, "We have a new drink called the Mueller Report." The Democrat said, "I'll have it!" The bartender handed him an empty glass.
Safe? Homerun!

 

SloopJohnB

Super Anarchist
1,408
352
New Zealand
[SIZE=16pt]Guy: 'Doctor, my girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection
and the condom never broke. How is it possible?'



Doctor: 'Let me tell you a story. There was once a hunter who always
carried a gun wherever he went. One day he took his umbrella instead
of his gun and went out. A lion suddenly  jumped in front of him. In
order to scare the lion, the hunter used the umbrella like a gun, and
shot the lion and killed it!'



Guy: 'Nonsense! Someone else must have shot the lion.'



Doctor: 'Good! You understood the story. Next patient, please.'[/SIZE]

 

P_Wop

Super Anarchist
7,125
4,274
Bay Area, CA
"I ended a five-year relationship last night."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.  How are you doing?"

"Just fine, thanks.  It wasn't my relationship."

 

On The Hard

Super Anarchist
3,550
435
San Antonio
I thought I'd rerun this classic from page 4, Always gives me a chuckle..

 A penguin is driving into a small town and notices his engine is giving off blue smoke. He drives into a repair shop and the mechanic tells him it will be about an hour to check things over. The penguin decides to walk across the street to McDonald's for lunch.

Penguins' tastes being what they are, rather than a Big Mac, the penguin orders a fish sandwich, finishes it and heads back to the garage.

Seeing him coming, the mechanic solemnly shakes his head and observes, "Buddy, it looks like you've blown a seal!"

The penguin quickly wipes his beak with a flipper and replies, "No, that's just tartar sauce."

 




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