LONQR 2

chester

Super Anarchist
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a fellow sailor's mother-in-law died a couple of years ago at 93: "she quit smoking at 90 but never gave up the whisky"! :D

 
Can this be legit?? 

Civilian Passenger Accidentally Ejects Himself Mid-Flight from French Fighter Jet. 

The 64-year-old manager at a French defense manufacturer had no experience flying in a fighter jet, nor had he ever expressed any desire to do so.  His colleagues surprised him with the gift of flying in a fighter jet he felt he couldn't say no. He didn't want to be rude.  But he was terrified. 

The man listened, stressed and confused, during a safety briefing when he was informed on how his ejector seat worked.  He was so nervous he didn't properly check his safety equipment.  But despite his inexperience and stress, the passenger was mostly in charge of securing himself in the cockpit.  This meant when they took off, his helmet had not been properly secured so it went flying in midair when he was ejected. 

The plane was subjected to a negative gravitational load factor, which can create the feeling of being upside down, the passenger reached for something to hold onto, but inadvertently grabbed the ejector handle. 

The man's parachute deployed and he landed in a field, sustaining minor injuries that required him to be taken to a hospital.  Despite the jet normally ejecting both the passenger and pilot when one of them pulls the ejector handle, the mechanism failed and only the passenger went flying.  The pilot remained in the cockpit and was eventually able to safely land the plane back at the airbase.

 

Burning Man

Super Anarchist
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Back to the desert
Can this be legit?? 

Civilian Passenger Accidentally Ejects Himself Mid-Flight from French Fighter Jet. 

The 64-year-old manager at a French defense manufacturer had no experience flying in a fighter jet, nor had he ever expressed any desire to do so.  His colleagues surprised him with the gift of flying in a fighter jet he felt he couldn't say no. He didn't want to be rude.  But he was terrified. 

The man listened, stressed and confused, during a safety briefing when he was informed on how his ejector seat worked.  He was so nervous he didn't properly check his safety equipment.  But despite his inexperience and stress, the passenger was mostly in charge of securing himself in the cockpit.  This meant when they took off, his helmet had not been properly secured so it went flying in midair when he was ejected. 

The plane was subjected to a negative gravitational load factor, which can create the feeling of being upside down, the passenger reached for something to hold onto, but inadvertently grabbed the ejector handle. 

The man's parachute deployed and he landed in a field, sustaining minor injuries that required him to be taken to a hospital.  Despite the jet normally ejecting both the passenger and pilot when one of them pulls the ejector handle, the mechanism failed and only the passenger went flying.  The pilot remained in the cockpit and was eventually able to safely land the plane back at the airbase.
Yep, its true.

 

Rasputin22

Rasputin22
13,399
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As requested, LONQR lives on....   :D

For those of you new here, "LONQR" means the "Land of Not Quite Right".  It's supposed to be an actual thing (not just a humorous meme) but it got fucked up in the translation, or it's going to cause injury or death due to stupidity, Someone thought it was a good idea but didn't think it through very well, etc.  LONQR can take on many forms.  Here's an example.

View attachment 355922
   I had a girl crew that was taking a year off from college and was out getting some travel and 'real world' experience. I found her on one of the 'CrewFinder' websites and just needed her for a delivery West from Puerto RIco until the owner of the boat could join us. Her profile looked promising and showed a good (enough) looking 6'2" gal that had some round the buoys racing experience and mentioned that she would arrive with her own foul weather kit, offshore harness, and handheld GPS and laptop with nav apps loaded. Who could ask for more! 

    She joined the boat about a week before intended departure and we took a little 'shakedown' cruise with an overnighter to the lovely beaches of Vieques. She exhibited a reluctance to join in on skinny dipping sessions and wore baggy basketball knickers down past the knees and those long sleeve UV sailing shorts even for a quick swim. She had one of those strawberry blonde complexions that would turn her into one big freckle if it weren't for UV cream applied with a spatula and i wrote her lack of enthusiasm for naked sailing off to that. She didn't seem to notice my tendency to drop trou and dive over the side once the anchor was down...

    She turned out to be a pretty good cook even under way and her aloofishness to her skipper cooled any further efforts to get to really know her any better under the situation. She would spend hours alone with an old fashion diary sort of notebook writing who knows what. No problem, any girl (or guy) who shows up well equipped for an offshore passage (not to mention cooking under way!) was a blessing on board. 

    Once back in Fajardo I got word that the owner would be delayed and I should just recruit another crewmember and head on out to try and get some miles under the keel in hopes of reaching the canal before the Hurricane season arrived. We sailed back over to St John and headed for the Backyard Bar to do the press gang routine to get our 'cabin boy' Much quicker than CrewFInder and I had the tall blonde to generate interest in our voyage. I soon had a young guy who was nearing the end of his 'year off' from college. I think they call that a 'gap year' these days. So we had our full compliment of three and then word came in from the owner he was landing in San Juan and ready to go sailing! He expected to just catch an airport limo to his awaiting boat in Fajardo but was OK to just catch the puddlejumper to St Thomas and join us in Cruz Bay. I thought he was going to maroon the young fellow who had already cancelled his flight home but he was such a likeable kid that he soon won the owner over. The kid was pretty sharp and a quick study as he had gotten up early and fixed a full breakfast which was awaiting the owner on his first morning on the boat. Turned out he was an ever better cook that the girl.

     We did a quick hop back to Marina Del Ray in PR and did some major provisioning for the Big Leap towards the Pacific. When we headed west with plans for a stop in Jamaica all seemed well and I wanted to do a close run down the rather surprisingly scenic south side of the Dominican Republic.  We made a quick fuel stop at the last marina before Haiti due to having no wind since we shoved off. The boat was an early diesel/electric hybrid of sorts and the genset was woefully under size compared to the electric motors and really didn't motoring constantly. I had already swapped out the whole exhaust system to let the diesel breath better but once the battery bank really got tapped out most of the go juice was trying to recharge the batteries instead of spinning the props. 

    As we got back under way, the owner just kept motoring due South instead of heading West and it turned out he imagined hordes of desparate Haitians lurking under every floating pallet or clump of Sargasso weed like zombies! He insisted on getting more than 25 miles offshore despite me telling him that the Haitians so desparate to board and hijack an innocent boat such as outselves would be doing so on the North side of the Island not the South side where we were. It was shocking that you could see the border between  Haiti and the DR because the lush green jungle just stopped at the fenceline and the western end of the Island was nearly totally denuded by goats and fire wood gatherers. Once we reached the Windward Passage we headed to the North side of Jamaica and had the fastest sail of our trip. We made record time to Port Antonio. Once there we had a nice stay. The 'cabin boy' had done a great job finding local goodies like fungi and ackee for out meals and he even bought some cans of that Cock Soup shown above. By this time all three of us guys onboard had gotten rejected by out Amazon shipmate and the young guy asked me if had hadn't noticed her Facebook page in which she talked about and shared photos of her and her volleyball team! I hadn't even imagined vetting her on Facebook and he was appalled that I hadn't done my due diligence and we could have had an axe murderer in our midst. I asked if being on a girls volleyball team indicated to him that she might be gay and he just laughed and said, 'Dude! Grow up...'

    He went on to pull the Cock Soup out every night and carry out into the cockpit (see what I did there?) and ask everyone if anyone wanted Cock Soup for dinner. The girl would just sort of go into a slow boil and I began to think with abuse such as this she might really turn out to be an ax (or machete) murderer and we all might end up as fish chum. I told him to knock it off after a couple of days. On one of the next stops going down the North Shore of Jamaica I saw him buying the dried powder envelopes of the Cock Soup and asked if he had like the stuff in the can. He said it was still upopened onboard and that he had a better use for the dried powder packets. A month later when the girl finally left the boat in Belize, she waved to us from the water taxi and the kid had a sly smile on his face. He said that he doubted that the girl would even know what a Dick tasted like so he had buried the Cock Soup packets in the bottom of her backpack. She had mentioned him that she couldn't wait to get home to her mother and put her feet up while her mother emtied her pack on the laundry room floor and would wash her travel clothes, just like old time! He said he could just imagine her Mom see the soup packets from Jamaica and wonder if her daughter had finally 'Got Her Groove Back' while in Jamaica!

cock-flavored-soup-grace-1-7-oz-4.png


 

bowman81

Super Anarchist
1,339
173
Australia
Can this be legit?? 

Civilian Passenger Accidentally Ejects Himself Mid-Flight from French Fighter Jet. 

The 64-year-old manager at a French defense manufacturer had no experience flying in a fighter jet, nor had he ever expressed any desire to do so.  His colleagues surprised him with the gift of flying in a fighter jet he felt he couldn't say no. He didn't want to be rude.  But he was terrified. 

The man listened, stressed and confused, during a safety briefing when he was informed on how his ejector seat worked.  He was so nervous he didn't properly check his safety equipment.  But despite his inexperience and stress, the passenger was mostly in charge of securing himself in the cockpit.  This meant when they took off, his helmet had not been properly secured so it went flying in midair when he was ejected. 

The plane was subjected to a negative gravitational load factor, which can create the feeling of being upside down, the passenger reached for something to hold onto, but inadvertently grabbed the ejector handle. 

The man's parachute deployed and he landed in a field, sustaining minor injuries that required him to be taken to a hospital.  Despite the jet normally ejecting both the passenger and pilot when one of them pulls the ejector handle, the mechanism failed and only the passenger went flying.  The pilot remained in the cockpit and was eventually able to safely land the plane back at the airbase.
Yep, its true.
I read that the pilot was able to land the plane after, I had assumed the rockets, explosive bolts etc. that the air-frame wouldn't be overly flyable after an ejection event.   

 

Burning Man

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Back to the desert
I read that the pilot was able to land the plane after, I had assumed the rockets, explosive bolts etc. that the air-frame wouldn't be overly flyable after an ejection event.   
Nah, in most two seat fighters - they have an option to either have the ejection sequence to individual or to both. I assume the Rafele 2 seater would be the same.
 

In individual setting, if the back seat pulls the handles - only the back seat goes. The front seater has to pull his own handles. if the front seat pulls the handles they both go - backseat first then front. Because if the front went first, the seat rockets would likely kill or severely burn the back seat guy. 
 

if the handles are set to both - whoever pulls the handles, they are both ejecting no matter what, but again the back always goes first followed by the front seater a fraction of a second later. 
 

Usually whenever we flew with non flyers in the back as “incentive rides” we would always set the handles to individual for the exact reason in this story. If the pilot stays in the jet, it’s not a big deal to land it. It’s just a convertible at that point as long as nothing else is wrong. Most jets have a robust windscreen that would protect the pilot from the wind blast as long as he slowed down. Many a jet has been landed with the back seat and canopy gone. 

 
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bowman81

Super Anarchist
1,339
173
Australia
Nah, in most two seat fighters - they have an option to either have the ejection sequence to individual or to both. I assume the Rafele 2 seater would be the same.
 

In individual setting, if the back seat pulls the handles - only the back seat goes. The front seater has to pull his own handles. if the front seat pulls the handles they both go - backseat first then front. Because if the front went first, the seat rockets would likely kill or severely burn the back seat guy. 
 

if the handles are set to both - whoever pulls the handles, they are both ejecting no matter what, but again the back always goes first followed by the front seater a fraction of a second later. 
 

Usually whenever we flew with non flyers in the back as “incentive rides” we would always set the handles to individual for the exact reason in this story. If the pilot stays in the jet, it’s not a big deal to land it. It’s just a convertible at that point as long as nothing else is wrong. Most jets have a robust windscreen that would protect the pilot from the wind blast as long as he slowed down. Many a jet has been landed with the back seat and canopy gone. 
Interesting, thanks for the detail. I assume the rectification bill after such an event wouldn't be couch change. 

 

Burning Man

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Back to the desert
Interesting, thanks for the detail. I assume the rectification bill after such an event wouldn't be couch change. 
In the grand scheme of things, fairly minor.  A new seat and a canopy - not chump change but it won't break the bank.  Probably the largest bill will be trying to remove the seat cushion from that gentleman's rectal orifice.  

 

Grande Mastere Dreade

Snag's spellchecker
Nah, in most two seat fighters - they have an option to either have the ejection sequence to individual or to both. I assume the Rafele 2 seater would be the same.
 

In individual setting, if the back seat pulls the handles - only the back seat goes. The front seater has to pull his own handles. if the front seat pulls the handles they both go - backseat first then front. Because if the front went first, the seat rockets would likely kill or severely burn the back seat guy. 
 

if the handles are set to both - whoever pulls the handles, they are both ejecting no matter what, but again the back always goes first followed by the front seater a fraction of a second later. 
 

Usually whenever we flew with non flyers in the back as “incentive rides” we would always set the handles to individual for the exact reason in this story. If the pilot stays in the jet, it’s not a big deal to land it. It’s just a convertible at that point as long as nothing else is wrong. Most jets have a robust windscreen that would protect the pilot from the wind blast as long as he slowed down. Many a jet has been landed with the back seat and canopy gone. 


bet the pilot was     WTF WAS THAT

 
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